Avi is by far my favorite character and when he said:
And this schmuck is gambling? You're talking about Franky "I've got a problem with gambling" *beep* Four Fingers Doug.
I lost it! Anyone else like this qoute?
'Oh Tyrone, what have you done?'
After they run over Boris. That line just kills me.
Anytime Tyrone says; "Course I am."
Everybody Dances To A Happy Beat!
Curious Little S*** Aren't You?
one of my absolute favorites that no one has mentioned is when boris is selling the gun to tommy and says (discussing the perks of owning a heavy gun):
"heavy is good, heavy is reliable... and if it doesn't work you can always hit him with it"
the delivery and the look on his face is incredible... rade sherbedgia focking rocks everything he's been in, and plays the character of boris like no one else ever could... his parts made me laugh throughout :)
Avi: Should I call you Bullet? Tooth?
Bullet Tooth Tony: You can call me Susan if it makes you happy.
Turkish: You take sugar?
Brick Top: No, thank you, Turkish, I'm sweet enough.
Bullet Tooth Tony: And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your guns... and the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle .50" written down the side of mine should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now, *beep* off!
Policeman: What's in the car?
Turkish: Seats and a steering wheel.
Vinny: Now, if you wouldn't mind telling me who the *beep* you are, apart from someone who feeds people to pigs, of course?
Avi: Find my friend a nice Jewish doctor!
Plus, every "ze Germans" line.
Come and get one in the yarbles, if ya have any yarbles, ya eunuch jelly, thou!
"You stop me while I`m walking again and I`ll cut your *beep* jacobs off"
"You`re right, no human being would stack books like this" - Venkman (Ghostbusters)
Tommy: "What's wrong with this one?"
Turkish: (Door falls off it's hinges) "Oh nothing Tommy. It's tip-top. I'm just not too sure about the colour."
Boris' scene against Tony, and when his gun jams on Tyrone. "You lucky bastard!"
The fact that Tony empties 6-8 rounds into him. LOL
"Oh I'm sorry I couldn't get the bi-noc-u-lar's out in time..."
"Why does he have a tea cozy over his head?"
"To keep his head warm.."
"It's a free country ain't it?
Well it isn't a free shop is it?
So, **** OFF!"
You show me how to control a wild *beep* gypsy and I'll show you how to control an unhinged, pig-feeding gangster.
Never trust a woman or a government - Captain Yellowbeard
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Tony: Avi, where's the case?
Avi: Put the gun away
Tony: What's Boris doin' 'ere? Boris...what are you doin' 'ere?
Boris: F()ck you!
*Tony shoots Boris twice*
Tony: Where's the case?
Boris: You piece of crap
Tony: Don't take the piss, Boris!
Boris: I show you.
*Tony shoots Boris four more times*
Boris: F()ck you!
*Tony shoots Boris one more time*
Boris: Almost had it.
Tony: For f()ck's sake...
*Shoots him an eighth time*
I aplaud discourse and abhor discourse-challenged trolls.
Sol: "Show me your hands!"
*man with a case does so*
Sol: "You have five fingers... GOD!"
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the way he delivered those lines was just hilarious
This film is LOADED with great lines!
Vinny: The dog! The dog must've ate it.
Avi: I'm getting heartburn, Tony do something terrible!
Avi: Should I call you Bullet? Tony?
Bullet Tooth Tony: You could call me Susan if it makes you happy.
Turkish: Have you ever crossed the road, and looked the wrong way? A car's nearly on you? So what do you do? Something very silly. You freeze. Your life doesn't flash before you, 'cause you're too fvckin' scared to think - you just freeze and pull a stupid face. But the pikey didn't. Why? Because he had plans of running the car over.
Errol: Hey, fvckface, who's speaking to you? He asked him, didn't he?
Turkish: *beep* I like that one Errol. I'll have to remember that one next time I'm climbing off yer mum.
Sol: He's a natural, ain't you Tyrone?
Tyrone: 'course I am...
[reverses into parked van]
Vinny: A natural fvcking idiot.
Customs official: Anything to declare?
Avi: Yeah. Don't go to England.
(probably my favorite joke from Farina besides the heartburn one haha!)
Mickey: Ah, save your breath for cooling your porridge. Now, look, I want the hector two roof lights, with the discover cushions and the matching side stripe caravan. Right. And she's terrible partial to the periwinkle blue, boys. Have I made myself clear, lads?
Turkish: Yeah, that's perfectly clear, Mickey. Just give me one minute to confer with my colleague. *turns to Tommy* Did you understand a single word of what he just said? (Gets me everytime haha!)
*after Tyrone takes all of that time to get out of the car*
Vinny: I thought you said he was a getaway driver. What the fvck can he get away from, eh?
Turkish: What's happening with them sausages, Charlie?
Sausage Charlie: Five minutes, Turkish.
Turkish: It was two minutes five minutes ago.
Sol: What the fvck is that?
Vinny: Heh heh. This is a shotgun, Sol.
Sol: It's a fvcking anti-aircraft gun, Vincent.
Vinny: Well I wanna raise some pulses, don't I?
Sol: You'll raise Hell. Never mind pulses.
Brick Top: Do you know these tits, Errol?
Errol: I know a lot of tits, Guv'nor. But I don't know any quite as fvcking stupid as these two
Vinny: What the fvck do you mean, replicas?
Sol: They look the *beep* don't they? And nobody is gonna argue. And I've got some extra loud blanks, just in case.
Vinny: In... Oh, in case we have to deafen them to death?
Sol: I'm not in here to make a fvcking bet.
Female Bookie: 'Preciated, but all... bets... are... off. If all bets are off, then there can't be any money can't there?
Sol: I'm not fvcking buying that.
Female Bookie: Well that's handy, 'cause I ain't fvcking selling it. It's a fact. (I just loved how calm she was when he had the shotgun aimed at her LOL!)
Vinny: Bad Boy. Sol.
Bad Boy Lincoln: Easy.
Sol: No, it's a moissanite.
Bad Boy Lincoln: A what-in-ite?
Doug: AVI!!
Avi: Shut up and sit down, you big bald fvck!
Sol: You ain't from this planet are you, Vincent? Who is gonna mug two black fellas, holding pistols, sat in a car that is worth less than your shirt?
Turkish: My name is Turkish. Funny name for an Englishman, I know. My parents to be were on the same plane when it crashed. That's how they met. They named me after the name of the plane. Not many people are named after a plane crash. That's Tommy. He tells people he was named after a gun, but I know he was really named after a famous 19th century ballet dancer.
Mickey: I'll tell ya what. I'll do it for a caravan.
Turkish: For what?
Pikeys: For a caravan.
Tommy: It was us who wanted a caravan. Anyway, what's wrong with this one?
Mickey: It's not for me. It's for me ma.
Turkish: Your what?
Pikeys: His ma! *hands him a picture of his mother.*
Bad Boy Lincoln: What has he got a tea cozy on his head for?
Sol: [sarcastic] To keep his head warm.
Bad Boy Lincoln: Well, what's the matter with him?
Vinny: He's been shot in the face, Lincoln. I would've thought that was obvious.
I LOVE this movie, so quotable!
"I am the ultimate badass, you do not wanna `*beep*` wit me!"- Hudson in Aliens.
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