My grandma had a black maid in the 50s in the south

I'm sorry, but I need to comment on this post. I realize it's meant well, but... well, I guess it's naive.

I grew up in southern Georgia in the 70s. This is AFTER the civil rights movement, mind you. We had a black maid, too. Every white family did. Nobody thought they were racist, because of course racists want to kill blacks, right? That's what the word means. So we weren't racist. Blacks were treated with courtesy as long as they kept to their own side of town and didn't get "uppity." Grown women - like our maid - called me ma'am when I was seven years old. Now, when I was five years old, it was decreed that my town had to integrate the schools. It had been required years before that, but our town was dragging its feet. Claiming that the expense was not feasible, yadda yadda. But they were ordered to get it done. The white parents FREAKED THE *beep* OUT that their children were going to be going to school, possibly sitting right next to black children.

But, seriously, they were not racist! They were very polite to blacks when they saw them, as long as they only saw them in places that were appropriate for colored folk to be.

Don't let anybody tell you that there were people in the south or parts of the south that were okay for blacks back then. It just isn't true. Watching this movie made me weep with shame, because it recalled so much of my childhood, things I want to remember fondly and know that I can't do so.

Your mother probably does think they treated their black maid well. Maybe they treated her better than their friends treated their help. But she had a job, she worked hard, and yet she lived in a shack. She was exploited by people who "treated her pretty well." Perhaps you're right that a lot of black women were thankful to do that well in life. That's just more reason that all southern whites should hang our heads in shame.

I appreciate your post and will respond back to you in respect.

I just have this to say. You say GRATEFUL.. I see this as a misguided word that maybe you don't understand how you are using it is disrespectful. It is like saying "I'm grateful I get to shovel manure every day" instead the proper word would probably be "I'm thankful I have a job even if it is shoveling manure every day" There is a big difference between grateful and thankful. Back in the 60's when dark skinned woman of American decent were treated like Negroids they did not have much of say. Some of the only jobs they could get were as maids. To say they were grateful is a UN-justices. They were probably more thankful that they could get a job to support their family. Just as in today's world where half of us are struggling to find jobs are thankful we can find a good one. Now would you be grateful to be a manure shoveler or be thankful for the job if you could not find any other. At least at the end of the day you can provide something to your family.

All I'm trying to do is point out the difference in the word. Grateful should not be the one you are looking for. It comes off as some what racist in the content that you put it in.

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Poor OP, you are quite misunderstood.

I am Filipino and I totally understand.

Filipinos are now the ones greatful to be maids by foreigners or in foreign countries.

We call them OFW. See Hongkong and Singapore. They often hire Filipina help.

"Haha!" - Nelson Muntz ... pointing at you. :)

There's a difference between an immigrant working their way up from the bottom and being systematically prohibited from progressing and impoverished. I'm sure there's no Jim Crow laws in China and terrorist preventing Filipinos from progressing.

I realize China is a third world country and there is a huge gap between wealth and poverty, what I didn't realize is that China was a country with such hypocrisy that it's government and constitution would promise freedom, people's rights and equality to one race of people and in turn either look the other way or support a domestic terrorist group by prohibiting the progression and government influence of another race. There are many third world countries out there but what makes people frown upon America's past is the hypocrisy. Blacks living in slums and being trapped in the life as sharecroppers was not the result of a poor economy it was a corrupt government. America a country known for the land of opportunity, freedom, and equality was actually a lie. Even Blacks who were educated and qualified found it difficult to obtain the American dream. I'm sure aware of what happened to those who dare to defy society's backwards standards.

As I was told here by 3 different users, Your Grandma's maid didn't like here and you were a child and didn't know but she wasn't part of your family. That maid was there because she needed something. If she hadn't needed work, do you think she would have cared at all for your family. She went home and told stories on your family and her so called loyalty was fake just like your grandma's. If the Maid had not needed ya'll, she surely wouldn't have been around you. They didn't like you or your family and you were a child and didn't have better sense. She didn't respect your grandma cause she just had to work and probably resented the fact she had to be around white peoples all day. Do you think she was there because she wanted to be?

Yes I know, it hurts. that was what was told to me with a story just like yours. Only My Grandparents had a great big farm and lived strictly off the land and the neighboring Blacks respected my family very well and would voluntarily come over and help out and my Granddaddy took very good care of them in return. They played with us children. We would have gotten the worst spanking for disrespecting one of them. They sat at our table many, many nights and ate supper and the farm house would be full on every porch after canning and cooking all day. These people have so much hate they find it hard to believe that people actually did care about each other regardless of color. It has only since I have been on here that I have reflected back on my childhood with a different perspective of the motives of the Blacks who filled my Grandma's house. Not one or 2 but up to 8 on a working day. We all had good memories. My Aunts and uncles had maids too but that was a crime even though they were treated in no way close to "The Help". It was a well paying respectful job for them. Most colored people were known and Respected for WHO they worked for and it gave them social status back then. The maids of the socialites were to be revered. But here, it is HATE and Bigotry. I'm surprised to see you didn't get the backlash I got. But I share your similar memories. Amazing how hate can really change our perception of things.

And treated her well.