Im married to my best friend.. He liked me first n i slowly got used to da idea.. He was very persistent and it all turned out good!
"If you cant see the light at the end of the tunnel, march down there and switch it on yourself"
wat is determined as da friend zone b/c in one post somebody said they waited like a month to see wat was going on. if dat da friend zone i know a few people dat hv got out of it. they stuck it out awhile finding out the likes and dislikes before making it a stable/benefit relationship. i just thought the 2 week month wait was to see if u liked the girl enough to date or so she don't tell everyone ur just a dog.
shareha. I have been in a similar situation.
I liked a girl, didn't know how to go about it so i became a friend of hers. After a while i told her how i felt, she said she is not interested. I called her the next day to make sure she is not interested, she told me the same so i have never spoke with her since them.
So i escaped the friend zone a little depressed and heart broken but i survived, years past since then, and now i hate her and slowly beginning to lose the respect i used to have for girls.
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The "Friend Zone"; a construct of entitled guys who think women are vending machines that sex falls out of when you put kindness coins in.
shareYes, many times...the friendship turned into FWB then some wound up as BF/GF.
shareI eacaped the friends zone once and it was a total disaster. He dumped me for a younger cheerleader (I was the exact opposite of that). It was for the best though because two months later I met my husband.
shareI think I have a couple times. Once I was at this girl's house while her boyfriend was in the hospital. I pretended to trip on something and grab her breasts to break my fall. When she giggled, I knew I was in like Flynn. Though now I'm starting to think that I was never really in the friendzone in the first place.
shareI have many female friends, but they all have one thing in common. Each and every one of them are either married, engaged or seriously involved with a guy when I meet them.
Many of them are with mates of mine, so that accounts for a few of them. Many women find me funny, and a nice guy. But they are all "spoken for".
I don't know. It seems that I act more "myself" around these girls, because I don't need to prove anything. I know where I stand, and she knows where she stands. I have a good reputation of not stealing my mate's girls, so most of these girls trust my intentions as being a "friend".
In some ways, it is good, because there is no chance of heartbreak. I can hang out with these women, when they are with my friends, and there is no awkwardness. Some of them have even wanted to set me up.
It seems that, when the girl is single, and I could be interested, I get more awkward, can't relax, and act totally differently. It is like being in with a chance makes me do things I wouldn't do around those girls who know me and trust me.
If I could hit it off with a girl, who turns out to be single and unattached, like I can with women who are "off-limits", then I would be set. But somehow knowing I have a chance plays a part in actually jepordising my chances.
I think, often, many people's expectations of what they are looking for in a future partner are way too high, so when someone nice comes along, they get put in the "friend zone" rather than be considered a potential prospect.
Think about this. People will stay in the crappiest job possible, and put up with a lot of other things that are below their expectations, yet when it comes to a relationship, they over-analyse so much, and have a "checklist" to find a mate.For some reason, their expectations of a relationship are so much higher than they are prepared to tolerate in other areas of their life.
Society also plays a part. They tell you that you "deserve the best" and that Prince or Princess Charming is out there, waiting for you. I hate to say it, but they are fairytale characters, and believing that you will hook up with him or her is a fairytale too.
Isn't a relationship simply a friendship, with the affection, kissing, hugging, sex etc, thrown in? Aren't the best marriages when you marry your "best friend" of the opposite sex? Yet people treat friends and lovers totally different, and act like the same person can't be both.
Why do things change when you go from friends to more? Shouldn't romance and love enhance the friendship. I mean, here is someone you trust, confide in, enjoy doing things together, like spending time together and know each other. Sounds like a good basis for a relationship. I mean, who wouldn't want to go out with someone who is like that. Yet, people will often start relationships with people they hardly know, and have just met, and then wonder why it doesn't work out, and don't take the "safe" route of picking the person who knows you best. I have never got it.
If more relationships and marriages were based on what you want from a friend, and then some, then I think we would have much less divorce.
Seeing that this post is 12 years old it's hard to believe that people still use this stupid term! LOL
But seriously, why do idiots self-apply this description when in reality it's just a euphemistic term to water down the fact that
someone you're attracted to doesn't feel the same way? Why the FUCK are you considering them friends at all after that?
I'll admit that I was rebuffed a couple of times, once in HS and later in college, and it got awkward after finding out that the feeling wasn't mutual. The best thing to do is move-on, but to pretend that you're still friends is just plain stupid. You were never "just friends" to begin with. The very least you could do is be upfront before you even forge any platonic level of friendship. Those kind of people who linger about after the fact are just creepy losers.