But people who commit suicide for no good reason other than they're depressed get no sympathy from me.
You're right. Being depressed is not a good reason to commit suicide.
However, when you're depressed...and I mean
truly depressed, to the extent that you wake up crying for no reason...don't shower for days, let alone get dressed...have to give yourself a pep talk to get out of bed to go to the toilet...can't concentrate long enough to read a single sentence (assuming your eyes aren't swollen shut from all the crying)...and every single thought you have is filtered through a lens of depression...
you aren't reasoning.
Your ability to reason has been taken away from you and all thoughts are being filtered through "depresso-logic", where all roads lead to "this world would be better off without you in it".
It's that internal voice that tells you that all those people in your phone you think are friends don't really want you to call them, and don't want to be burdened by your non-problem that's "all in your head". It's that internal voice that says that now that you can barely look after yourself, let alone work or study, that you're just a giant waste of space, sapping the time, energy and resources from everyone you care about.
Guess what! I've been through a major depressive episode. I still have dysthymia and anxiety, but they're being managed pretty well. Anyhow, I saw how deep that pit of depression went, and I don't want to go anywhere near it again. That place is frickin' scary!
Fortunately I went on meds before I got to the point where I was an actual threat to my own life, but I can guarantee you that all my thoughts were leading me down that road.
You don't need to have "sympathy"...but a little "empathy" would be nice, especially since you never know when and who might be struck down by this insidious disorder.
Judgment from someone like you is a depressed person's number one fear. They already have a crap-load of inappropriate guilt, so they really don't need someone else making them feeling guilty for feeling the way that they do on top of everything else.
Depression could strike down a sibling, a parent, a spouse or partner, a friend...or even you.
I truly hope you and the people you care about never go through what I went through (or worse)...but believe me when I say that statistically it's very likely, and you might want to change your attitude to one that's a little more compassionate.
You don't have to endorse suicide to understand why someone might feel that way. Actually, if you can understand someone without judgment (even if you don't agree with them) it's one of the biggest gifts you can give to someone who is in mental turmoil.
Deep down they probably know they're not thinking straight...but having someone who can both think straight AND understand them at the same time is exactly what they need to bridge the gap between them and the health-care services that will save their life.
So...ready for that attitude adjustment?
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