Doesn't anyone else think Rich's behaviour was rude even by "American standerds"? He puored soy sauce on the food that was meant for everyone else, and drank so much wine...
If he were at my family's table doing any of that, my uncles would probably kick him out... But aside from the Chinese manners doesn't it still seem a little rude?
yeah, definitely
sharei actually think that's how all americans are at dinner........sort of. he wasn't that bad but he could've at least done better.
isaiah 53:5
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A common thread the two books by Amy Tan that I read (this one and The Kitchen Gods Wife) is the way of chinese modesty. In the book it explains that it is common for the cook to condemn her own cooking for the sake of not seeming too proud. The people eating it are then supposed to reply saying that it is a wonderful dish, not to be silly, NEVER agree with her or attempt to tell her "it isn't that bad, nothing a little soy couldn't fix".....lol. In the book she actually states this is her mothers "best" dish and goes on to explain the "routine" at her table of her mother regularly belittling the dish and her family then giving it 5 stars. Silly by our standards but very common in asian culture. Though I don't think it's too different than our women putting themselves down whenever we receive a compliment ie: "oh, this old thing? Just something I had laying around." After we went out and spent 2 bills to look good..lol.
shareNo Americans do not dump condiments on food to be served for everyone.
The wine thing was forgivable.
I'm a white American married to a Filipina and had no problems traveling to the Philippines. The basic approach is to be as polite and conservative as possible until you know what is ok and not and to pay attention to the advice your spouse gives you.
I guess the Rick character was trying to hard fit in. In any event a very funny moment in the film that makes for more funny quips later.
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Filipinas are light years different than Chinese. Filipinos are almost like Caucasian westerners, same religion etc.
shareI didn't understand the soy sauce, 'cause according to general American custom, you would probably just pour it onto your own plate (a la salt and pepper). I think he was honestly trying to help out, but as we would say, he ended up "bang dao mang"--helping backwards and making things worse.
As for the wine... I think it's normal for people to knock back the first glass, and he probably didn't realize that Chinese don't work that way.
Although if he went to China now, he'd probably have a hard time keeping up.
Gothic Author
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Rich's character seemed like an innocent goof ball to me. He didn't know he was being rude. But, yes, Chinese manners or not, he shouldn't have poured soy sauce into the whole dish.
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The soy sauce on the dish. That was a simple honest mistake. You see, Waverly (simple ass) didn't exactly fill him in on Chinese manners and customs that her family has. The thing was that Lindo, who was an excellent cook, always says something bad about her own cooking to get the family to eat it and say it was the best thing they ever had. This particular dish was not salty enough, hence Rich pouring on the soy sauce.
share^ I'm sorry, cerelle, but I don't think that was Waverly's fault.
That would be exactly the same as pouring hot peppers all over everyone's pizza or a bunch of salt in someone's soup.
He REALLY should have known better.
This time, Effie White's gonna win.
Whitney was wrong. Children are no longer the future.
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This is something that's apart of Chinese culture that someone who didn't grow up in it wouldn't understand. Our culture is very dear to our hearts, so don't be mean. I wish everyone could appreciate this movie and understand it to the full value, but many things are lost in translation (culturally).
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I have to agree with you that it seemed weird. I can't feature anybody, Asian or American, doing that. It just didn't ring true. I'm not trying to be nitpicky here but it wasn't Rich that stands up to his mother it's the other guy, I'm not sure the name, you know, the cheater.
share<It just didn't ring true.>
No. It didn't. I've never seen ANYBODY do that.
God save Donald Duck, vaudeville and variety
Rich was a nasty pig!! It's not even "Chinese Customs". It's just good 'ol manners to not HOG ALL THE FOOD and POUR SOY SAUCE ALL OVER THE FOOD
shareI thought it was incredibly rude. Perhaps Americans have different manners, but you don't touch food other than your own, nor do you make a glutton of yourself at the table.
And any man should know that when a woman self-deprecates, she doesn't really mean it.
Totally rude. I thought he was just an idiot, Chinese or American manners. Okay, a cute goofball type of idiot, but his behaviour just made my jaw drop.
shareI'd allready read the book before seing the film, so I knew what was gonna happen. But I once saw the film with my dad, and when we came to that particular scene my dad coughed violently and then asked: "where did this woman pick up this guy??"
He had good intentions in mostly whatever he did, but he lacked so much in social learning, and that made him a complete idiot.
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They blew up Congress!!! HAHAHA!
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... coincidentally I had a similar experience during dinner last Christmas at a friend's place. A non-Asian couple basically started eating before everyone was seated and grabbed gobs of food. So I guess perhaps Amy Tan's examples are not THAT far fetched :-)
shareI realize this is an is an old thread, but I do hope that some (not all :) of the posters have relaxed over the years :) I mean, c'mon, why take the whole "Rich at dinner" scene so seriously? It was comical, at the very least quirky, but certainly not an attempt to deliberately insult Chinese tradition without care or forethought. Some of the posts on this 5 year old thread take it too far, and ridiculously so.
JLC makes it clear Rich was a lovable "oaf". Waverly ADORED him. She also made it clear she failed to brief Rich on traditional Chinese custom fully expected. How else was he supposed to know a "small spoonful" to start, or a "taste" of wine? Was he supposed to be a mind reader too? What Rich knew is (almost) exactly what the American celebration dinner is supposed to be, "eat, drink and be merry." Anything LESS would be an insult.
Now. Pouring soy sauce over the ENTIRE dish? Thoughtless at best, I completely agree, but in no way intended to purposefully ruin the dish without care or concern. Since mom completely insulted her OWN cooking and said "it not good to eat" it looks like Rich followed the very same lead mom set for the table. In his own odd way he tried to save the WHOLE dish, since mom said the WHOLE dish "not good to eat" in the first place (as absurd as this may be)
This is one of my favorite scenes in the film, and am surprised so many tried to take it to this level. And besides, for as much callousness and crudeness shown throughout some characters in this film, Rich is the least of them all. If Rich's sole intention were heartless in nature, we'd KNOW it for certain and not up for debate.
*Worth a mention off topic, these are some of the most beautiful women in the world ever captured on film. Incredible movie altogether, no matter how different from the book it may seem.
The man was nervous and was trying to help- he's obviously not even a cook because no one just throws soy sauce over everything to make it taste better! lol.
I mean seriously no one here has every done something stupid when trying to help out and nervous?
BTW I agree that it was the daughter's fault she didn't tell him any of the customs like tell mom her food is delicious, don't take more than a few bites, etc.
I think people are taking it wayyyyy tooo seriously.