50 Cent.... what a goofy name.

Oh, come on, now! Don't be giving all the credit to hip hop stars. Country, rock and roll, pop rock, blues, rhythm & blues, jazz, folk, bluegrass, and even classical composers can represent quite assertively when it comes to goofy names. Worst thing about some of them (particularly the classical composers) is that these are a few of their real names. But, most are stage names, and goofy as hell, though we've probably heard them so many times that we don't realize just how goofy the names are. Hell, "Elvis Presley" would be on this list if not for the fact that his name is so incredibly well-known. I included a couple non-musicians who put out albums in their day, like the comedians "Cheech & Chong" and "Chevy Chase," but almost all of these are music artists. I'm also excluding most band names. These are mainly individual artists' stage names. These are coming mostly from my memory, so I'm leaving a lot of names out because my memory isn't what it used to be, but consider ...

Cannonball Adderley
Adam Ant
Little Anthony
The Big Bopper
Little Stevie Wonder
Bono
The Edge
David Bowie
Dizzy Gillespie
Nuno Bettencourt
Duke Ellington
Dwight Yoakam
Lady Gaga
Merle Haggard
Doc Watson
Ace Frehley
Gene Simmons (whose real name is much goofier)
Paul Stanley
Vinnie Vincent
Ginger Baker
Gary U. S. Bonds
Sonny Bono
Cher
Ringo Starr
Flash Cadillac
Chubby Checker
Cheech & Chong
Commander Cody
Nat King Cole
Dee Dee Ramone
Joey Ramone
The Ramones (any of them, really)
Billy Idol
Sid Vicious
Johnny Rotten
Alice Cooper
Marilyn Manson
Bing Crosby
Christopher Cross
Johnny Cash (my favorite artist, and that's his real name)
Mac Davis
Skeeter Davis
Doris Day
Kiki Dee
Elton John
Desmond Dekker
John Denver
Chevy Chase (took his stage name after the name of a city in Maryland)
Dion
Bo Diddley
Neil Diamond
Muddy Waters
Fats Domino
Donovan
Bob Dylan (probably better than Robert Zimmerman)
Mama Cass
England Dan
Fabian
Freddy Fender
Cat Stevens
Crystal Gayle
Boy George
Gary Glitter
Slim Harpo
Screamin' Jay Hawkins
Jimi Hendrix
Billie Holiday
Buddy Holly
Wolfman Jack
Mick Jagger
John Paul Jones
K.C. (of the Sunshine Band)
Ernie K-Doe
Chaka Khan
B.B. King
Ben E. King
Kris Kristofferson
Englebert Humperdink
k.d. lang [officially, no capital letters]
Geddy Lee
Tommy Lee
Nikki Sixx
Mick Mars
Vince Neil
Liberace
Little Richard
Little Eva
Courtney Love
Spanky MacFarlane
Madonna
Manfred Mann
Barry Manilow
Meatloaf
Eddie Money
Van Morrison
Jelly Roll Morton
Juice Newton
Billy Ocean
Tony Orlando
Ozzy Osbourne
Buck Owens
Gram Parsons
Johnny Paycheck
Peaches & Herb
Iggy Pop
Johnny Cougar/John Cougar Mellencamp
Prince
Suzi Quatro
Eddie Rabbit
Boots Randolph
Paul Revere
Smokey Robinson
Axl Rose
Slash
Duff McKagan
Izzy Stradlin
Gilby Clarke
Sam the Sham
Boz Scaggs
Seals & Crofts
Dee Dee Sharp
Shep
The Singing Nun
Grace Slick (my favorite female rock star vocalist)
Dusty Springfield
Edwin Starr
Sting
Sly Stone
Booker T
Johnny Thunders
Tiny Tim
Shania Twain
Conway Twitty
Vangelis
Junior Walker
Howlin' Wolf
Timi Yuro
Weird Al Yankovic
Frank Zappa (real name, and his kids' real names are Dweezil, Diva, Moon Unit, and Ahmet Emuukha Rodan)
Tracii Guns
John St. John
Blackie Lawless
Jizzy Pearl
Chip Z'Nuff
Lemmy Kilmister
Flea
Captain Beefheart
Napoleon Murphy Brock
Elvis Costello
Twiggy Ramirez
John 5
Rob Zombie
Randy California
Perry Farrell ("peripheral," anyone?]
Percy Sledge
Thelonious Monk
Angus Young
Bon Scott
Mick Cripps
K.K. Downing
Geezer Butler
Nicko McBrain
Rev. Horton Heat
Joe Strummer
Billy Zoom
Black Francis
Freddie Mercury
Buster Poindexter (David Johansen's lounge singer alter ego)
King Diamond
Johnnie Guitar Watson
Johnny Winter
Edgar Winter
Warren Zevon
Rikki Rockett
C. C. Deville
Bobby Dall
Snowy White
Syd Barrett
Bootsy Collins
Fee Waybill
Tommy Tutone
Rivers Cuomo
Trent Reznor
Slim Pickins
Slim Chance
Grandpa Jones
Motorhead Sherwood
John Lee Hooker
Nick Cave
Tony Iommi
Zoot Horn Rollo
Nelly Furtado
Woody Guthrie
Brody Dalle
Sufjan Stevens
The Cramps (who are "Lux Interior" and "Poison Ivy")
Nick St. Nicholas (Steppenwolf)
and my favorite, Dick Hyman
Don't even get me started on Classical composers names! Hector Berlioz? Gustav Holst? Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart? WTF? Worst part: Those were their real names!

That's a lot of goofy! But hey, I ain't judging anyone. Whatever gets you noticed and makes people remember you is a good stage name!

Christopher Wallace got the name "Biggie," when he was a kid growing up in a tough neighborhood in Brooklyn, NY, the nickname obviously based on his size, him being a rather robust lad. It's no different than calling a big dude "Big'un," or calling a younger person "Lil'," or "Little," like "Lil' Wayne," "Little Richard," or "Little Stevie Wonder."

"Biggie Smalls" is a reference to a character in the Sidney Poitier/Bill Cosby film, Let's Do It Again (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073282/), as well as a nod to his stature. He stood at 6'3" and weighed over 300 pounds. "The Notorious B.I.G." came about because of legal issues using "Biggie Smalls" as his official stage name, since it was already trademarked. Nonetheless, it remained a nickname for him. The "B.I.G." acronym actually stands for nothing. He just liked how it sounded. That said, there is a charity setup in his honor, The Christopher Wallace Memorial Foundation (http://cwmf97.blogspot.com/2011/03/our-mission.html), which holds an annual black-tie dinner called the "B.I.G. Night Out" to raise funds for children's school equipment and supplies. For this particular event, "B.I.G." is said to stand for "Books Instead of Guns."

Biggie also sometimes referred to himself in his raps as "Frank White," which was the name of Christopher Walken's drug lord character in King of New York (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099939/), thus marking himself as the king of NYC.

According to FBI documents, at the time of his death he was wearing size 48 Karl Kani jeans, size 13 Timberland shoes, and a size 54 Bernini sweater. In his pockets were 3 Magnum condoms, which are the condoms especially made for well-endowed men. So, I guess his junk was as big as the rest of his body, LOL. http://www.thewrap.com/media/article/biggie-smalls-carrying-magnum-con doms-weed-time-death-26220/ He also had an asthma inhaler and some weed in his pockets, according to the documents: http://i.cdn.turner.com/dr/teg/tsg/release/sites/default/files/assets/ biggieitems.jpg

His legacy is that he is considered to be the hip-hop star that revived the NYC rap scene, which had at the time been overshadowed by LA's G-funk style of hip hop music, immortalized in the classic album The Chronic, by famed producer Dr. Dre.

I know that you were just making a joke, and you probably don't care about any of this, but some folks might. I love this kind of info/trivia.