You know the drill....lets go
Chinese milk is available from the moon and is trusted
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You kill the aliens from behind and ignore the tentacles that can strangle you
That nerdy guy has a heart of a warrior
Don't use guns on aliens, just two machetes is fine
if you can't sense your pants aren't on you need someone to tell you
bump
shareAn old Jewish man in a small boat, can outrun a giant wall of water, as well as a gigantic ship's massive gravitational pull.
Being Queen of a massive alien hive, means someone is going to not only build you a giant bio-suit with shields, but also a BFG for which to take aim at puny alien scum!
"Thanks, guys." "So long, partner."
- Toy Story 3 (9/10)
The right way to distract an alien is peeing.
Most people during an alien invasion will stay in their lanes while driving. A a few may drive off the road.
Cars can move around in knee deep water and not stall their engines.
Hospitals are extremely efficient at evacuating, except for the one off newly born child and its mother.
You may be a hotshot pilot, but when it comes to saving your Mom...just sit back and let the professionals do the saving.
Nothing alleviates tension of massive death and destruction around you, then making a joke about the death and destruction around you.
If the Secret Service agent assigned to protect your father fails at his job at least 3 times, it's perfectly fine not to ask for a replacement.
90% of the times, alien spacecraft controls will be configured just like the ones your own ships were designed off of!
"Thanks, guys." "So long, partner."
- Toy Story 3 (9/10)
dinner first when asking a girl out
shareNailed it!
share[deleted]
Despite building up the Aliens as a warlike species whose means of sustenance is harvesting other planets and who has already clashed with us in the past...
1. Don't use military tactics in any capacity
1b. Only cause damage through the act of landing your massive warship, but then don't actually attempt to attack or disable any defenses of the planet youre harvesting.
1c. Send the ONLY important member of your species to the frontlines, immediately, with weak protection that can easily be overcome by lesser, outdated versions of your own tech.
1d. Design your ships so that any foreign object can easily fly into a giant hole in the bottom and come face-to-face with the only important member of your species. Don't build any kind of structures inside the craft and absolutely no security of any kind is necessary.
1e. Even though you have advanced tech, the only defenses you need are some canons that fire in arbitrary trajectories and can't hit anything, ever
1f. Expend ALL resources to attack the last remnant of a defeated species because it could, maybe, eventually, help lead a species that barely understands spaceflight to a distant cache of weapons
2. Security is totally unnecessary
2b. Build ships so that another hostile species can perfectly fit inside and use immediately with no learning curve.
2c. Have the ability to control your ships via mind control or whatever, but only use it to make ships arbitrarily fly in a circle around you and not to stop stolen ships or anything
3. Instead of drilling for 30 more seconds to reach the core, you should just abort immediately.
4. Having a huge hole going all the way to the earths core has absolutely no effect on the earth whatsoever.
5. America can single-handedly fight off a vastly superior invading species with the help of only a single Chinese pilot, and it can easily be done in an hour.
6. Buddhist monks living in a remote location in the mountains have CB radios lying around
7. Will Smith was a great man
Limon Hemswoggle does not have the charisma nor the wit to be a Will Smith Replacement.
shareAllowing a moon laser to fall onto your base and crush everyone inside is a better idea than having the 20 space tuggs that placed it there try and stop the fall.
Jeff Goldblum is a real dick and hasn't spoke to his father in a year and a half.
Jeff also doesn't care about Connie anymore, or she died (oh wait, we didn't learn ANYTHING about Connie).
If you are a giant intelligent white orb and build an entire planet to resist the attach from the aliens from ID1 (that planet with shields) just go to earth without any kind of intelligence on Earth and scare the shi*t out of the entire moon causing them to shoot your shield-less space transport.
Every other nation will sit back and allow aliens to go to war with Africa without stepping in and stopping it because the African leaders pride.
Every girl in the future is super skinny and even children wear low cut shirts. Oh, and children do not have to be supervised at all while their parents are at Grandmas.
Will Smith made a good decision.
Dr. Okun was gay but we had no idea until they mentioned a scarf.
I will never be able to get my money back that could have been spent on seeing a better movie.
You could threaten with a gun the ticket seller to give you your money back! I'm sure the judge would clear the case! LOL
I'm not rich!I'm just a poor man with money. :) (from the movie: Love in the Time of Cholera)
The aliens have Netflix which allows them to stream President Whitmore's speech from the first film.
shareIf you're a woman, you're either the daughter of someone who dies, the hero's mom who dies or the much younger girlfriend to the much older hero. Or you're the US President. Who of course is totally incompetent when compared to the previous male President.
shareYou can have giant aircraft that uses alien adapted tech, but we will still drive the same cars for some reason.
shareWhen a giant drill is digging to the core of the Earth, its good to waste a few minutes by shaving.
shareIf we traverse the entire globe for the best fighter-pilots....the Top-5 will include a skinny young woman, a skinny young Chinese woman, and skinny young nerd.
As for ground fighting....nerds have the heart of a warrior. They just don't like working-out apparently.
An alien ship with a 3000 mile diameter can be attacked very easily. Just go around the front side of it or whatever.
NASA and the entire United States government has a severe shortage of qualified scientists and engineers. We needed to recycle 2 or 3 old nut-jobs from 20 years ago just to figure out that an alien crate needs to be sawed open.
Entire cities were completely destroyed. A couple states were completely destroyed. But thank goodness the wreckage pile-up stopped literally 1 inch from the White House. Thank goodness the wreckage from all that was just hanging over the White House and didn't land on top of it.
1. That the mothership from the first movie must have had a queen they didn't know about, also, that no one has ever killed a queen so it couldn't have had one.
2. That aliens hate Africa, because while every single one of them crashed and became catatonic after they blew up the mothership, the one over Africa decided "screw the mothership, we're gonna land here and fight these Africans for the next ten years".
3. That aliens who comes here with an attack plan and gets defeted is gonna come back with no plan at all.
4. That the biggest threath to a species of high tech hostile aliens is a ball with no sheilds, no defences and nothing that can help us kill a queen that can be taken down easily by a few small ships.
5. That a species of aliens that's ravaged the universe, harvested millions of planets and exterminated countless species are totally gonna lose their cool if a human pisses in their spaceship.
6. That someone else should have written this movie.
to interrogate an alien, you put your own life at risk by letting them strangle you
share1. That the mothership from the first movie must have had a queen they didn't know about, also, that no one has ever killed a queen so it couldn't have had one.