Emotion is ther in areas, just not promoted by drawn-out scenes. Ed gave Charley piece of mind in his death, Charley felt guilt in several scenes, Peter was revieled to have been the surviver as his parents were killed by Jerry in end, The tears of the gf as Jerry bit her, the shh from neighbor as Jerry bit her to Charley, and the mom in hospital as Charley decided what to do where all moments.
Charley hesitated and agonized a few times over Ed's death and abandonment which if it was much more people would have complained of him being a pussy.
The club was done more as a you can't save anyone moment for Charley rather than a suduction of the darkness as in the original. This was the fifth person(Charley knew of at the time) he failed to save(Adam, Ed, Neighbor(Doris), Mother, and now his gf)
I agree they could have added some more to define the characters like the original did. Slowing down knowledge of Jerry to build speculation we could see the changes in Charley to a jerk towards Adam and Ed. Maybe have the bullies pick on them then Adam's death. Ed's disappearance should have promted his parents to seek Charley and awaken his mother's concern of his affections for his gf costing him his original friends who are gone for some reason and he is oblivious! Then finding Ed's proof would have been the bomb that sent Charley reeling into the missing neighbor freeing.
Plus what happened to his gf's friends? She should have had scenes where they discuss her and Charley's relationship to inform us the audience if she always liked him or this new him. Then they would be good for the stoner friends to flirt with. This would give them more reason to hang out watching Charley's house. Charley hanging out with his gf and her friends would prompt the stake-outs! The frind's lack of seeing them following would alert Charley to their disappearance(otherwise we forget them until the showdown in Jerry's lair).
I liked Peter having an assistant gf, this gave him a reson to want to help Charley, he lost someone special again and wants to face Jerry (in essence growing up like Charley was in the film).
The charm of Jerry could have been used on Adam, Ed, and Charley's mothers to draw out the fathers and target the boys. This also would have been a way to introduce Peter's idea that killing the patriarch frees the victims. So when the hunt Jerry later it would be with the mindset that gf, surviving family members, friends, and either of them bitten can be undone once Jerry is ashes!
Anyone else notice Lisa Loeb was Ed's cute mother? I was wondering that until I checked credits and was thinking why didn't Jerry just use her to get Ed? She and Charley's mom where prime choices! Hot mom with average guy and a hot single mother, Jerry even said Charley's mom was putting it out there!(her avilible sint, not random hook-ups) guess Jerry was so sure of himself he didn't feel the need to place sleepers to make his job easier. I mean date with Charley's mom and boom one, then hit Ed's mom while hubby's at work and Ed's at school. Checkmate! Mom turns hubby, invites Jerry in for Ed, Charley's mom gets him conered for Jerry, and Friends take care of neightbors while crusing around. Jerry could have a whole neighborhood of infected or victims in a week!
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vhowall
11 years ago
CJMovieFan, your plot would do well for a Fright Night fanfiction story, in my opinion. If I enjoyed reading on this thread, I would definitely read it in full literate form.
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