Can someone remember a conversation where their personal lives were brought up?
It was a fling. They gelled in their conversations and hit it off. No strings attached.
If she would have lied about her family, she would be a B.
But basically, it was don't ask, don't tell.
And the reality is that it happens more times than not.
Shame on a desperate detached Clooney.
OK, this is really minor but but...does it bug anyone else when actors' real names and characters' names get all mashed up as if they are interchangeable?
Apparently, dogs are wolves with Williams-Beuren Syndrome.
It was still pretty cold of her. She's not entirely wrong that they both signed up for the same thing, but he was a generally likable guy, and she had been likable up to that point, and she could have made her point a lot less harshly.
shareShe was a cold hearted bitch who was effectively cheating on her husband and kids. Her quite pathetic line to clooney when he found out of "im a adult, call me if you want to see me again", summed her up: she had no regard for anyone but herself! She was either in denial a socio path or both?
shareMaybe she had her husbands permission. We are sure she has been sleeping around so she has maybe made a mistake before. She hardly seemed conservative.
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She did not have her husband's permission or she would not have freaked out when she answered the door, and blasted him on the phone afterwards for stalking her.
Very good. But brick not hit back!share
Did you see her in Never Forever? She was pretty cold hearted in that movie too. She's good at playing crazy detached women...She's "Norma Bates" Norman Bates' mother in "Bates Motel" on A and E.
shareYES! Those were my thoughts exactly. She is such a fing c.
She had a thing for spontaneous guys like him, and she played/betrayed him. It's clear she meant to conceal her family from him during that stupid part where she describes her "perfect guy"... where she flirtatiously describes pretty much her online dating profile, "...likes kids, wants kids... hopefully some hair on his head... though that's not even a deal breaker these days." Wtf!! It's not like she's dreaming here, she actually DOES have a husband.
In this conversation she should have said, "Well, when I met my husband I was looking for..." blah, blah. But instead she made sure Ryan was deceived. He was just a toy to her. What a bitch.
She was a cold hearted bitch who was effectively cheating on her husband and kids. Her quite pathetic line to clooney when he found out of "im a adult, call me if you want to see me again", summed her up: she had no regard for anyone but herself! She was either in denial a socio path or both?
Very good. But brick not hit back!share
little of both, i felt she was cold when he was bringing her to the wedding and everything to not be like oh hey red light. she just went with it like oh ok i can go anywhere in your boundaries, just stay out mine.
when she asked what he was thinking showing up to her house, i would have asked what were you thinking being my date to my sister's wedding? how did u expect me to behave?
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Hey Laser Lips Yo Momma Was A Snow Blower - Johnny 5
Cold hearted bitch! Sorry but thats how I feel.
A. Clooney's character signed up for a fling which he THOUGHT was a single person like himself. She gave off all the signs that she was just this casual, fly-by-night kind of person and probably WHAT attracted him to her in the first place. I'm sure if found out she was really a soccer mom with a lot of frequent flyer miles, he wouldnt have been anywhere near that. The mystique was finding a mirror image of himself in her.
B. How would you feel the entire time you were sleeping with a MARRIED woman, but didnt know about it? What happens if she breaks down to the husband one day and he goes looking for him over something he thought was just innocent and fun? Or what if he just feels BAD sleeping with someone elses wife?? He wasnt perfect but he didnt come across an ass either. You give him the FULL info first and let him make a decision from there. She said he couldve ruined what she had. Bitch if you TOLD him the truth, he wouldnt have shown up in the first place.
C. She gave him hopeful signs like going to his sister's wedding, getting to know his family, introducing herself as his date....married people who have flings dont go to their mistresses important family functions and introduce themselves as the person they been seeing heavily if they are secretly married? I know this is all just make believe, but ONCE she did that, SHE pushed it to the next level. She shouldve just said no, keep it VERY casual or just told him the truth from that point on.
End of the day, she wanted her cake and eat it too. She knew once she told him the truth, he would bolt, so she was trying hard to keep both worlds going out of her own selfishness and didnt think about him.
Ok, but he was a big boy. I'm sorry, but at that age, I would kind of mix in asking the typical questions such as "are you married" or "do you have any kids". It was absolute unrealistic thinking on his part.
If she lied, that's one thing. But i really gather from the story that he WAS indeed living in a fantasy world.
There is no way that I would assume a woman of her substance to be uninvolved.
He was detached from "reality". Traveling 320 days a year and accumulating 10M miles are staggering to me. His life was passing him by and Alex was absolutely 100% correct in her assessment of him...cold and hard but true.
Sorry, but no. Let us go through the movie, starting with the scene where Natalie (Ms. Keener) is upset because her boyfriend left her in a text message. While trying to console Natalie, Alex (Ms. Farmiga) describes her ideal man, while staring at Ryan (Mr. Clooney). There, she lets Natalie believe that (1) she is single and (2) Ryan is her ideal man. She lets Ryan believe both of those claims, too.
As the film progresses, Natalie challenges Ryan about this. I am paraphrasing, but she calls out Ryan on his "bull**** philisophy" and points out how Alex runs Ryan's "gauntlet of tests and comes out the other end smiling", and yet Ryan still treats their relationship like a casual fling. She challenges Ryan to "grow up" and commit to Alex more deeply, and coming from a rather young character like herself, that leaves an impression on Ryan.
When Ryan invites Alex to be his guest at the wedding of his relatives (and thus meeting his family, however estranged he may be from them), Alex should have told her something about her personal life, rather than leading him on further. This is especially true when Ryan shows Alex where he grew up, went to school, etc.
*******Alex should have told her something about her personal life, rather than leading him on further. This is especially true when Ryan shows Alex where he grew up, went to school, etc.*******
Sure she should have. But again, Ryan is a big boy. He might have been wise to once mix in a significant question about her personal life.
He was not "grown up" at all.
Can we agree that the answer to my question is both? Alex was cold-hearted and Clooney (Ryan) was naive.
I agree, it was both.
shareAlso, she doesn't wear her ring. Ryan asks her early on if she's in a relationship. Alex says that's a topic she doesn't want to talk about. (at least according to my translation) So, I think both Alex is a cold-hearted b* and Ryan is a little naive for not picking up on that.
shareSometimes people hear what they want to hear. That's a pretty neutral way of saying it. "I don't want to talk about it"...it just slips through without registering.
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A bit of both I guess, but I would blame Alex a bit more for accompanying Ryan to his sister's wedding, and thus leading Ryan into believing that their relationship can grow into something more.
Hey there, made you look at my signature - didn't I ? . . :-)
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We call women sluts for having affairs but never men. That is crap. Men are bigger sluts but we don't label them with that. She just wanted some on the side, kind of like millions of men for thousands of years.
shareBull.
Ryan was a flawed man but not purposely deceitful as Alex was.
Had she wanted it to remain a fling she should not have accepted the invitation to his sisters wedding.
She was needlessly cruel and dishonest.
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What you wish will come back upon yourself.
shareTheir fling was based on the mutual understanding that neither was looking for an emotional attachment. Ryan "falls" for her, why? Because she is the female version of him? Because he opened up to her and shared stuff about himself?
I haven't seen the movie in a while, but I don't remember him ever trying to get to know things about her. If you're really interested in someone, you want to know everything about them. If my memory is correct, he's just a narcissist. He doesn't have feelings for her, he has feelings for himself.
Alex is clearly the more deplorable character because she's betraying her husband and basically living a double life, but that doesn't mean Ryan is the good guy or the victim. He was not victimized by Alex.
He gives seminars about having no personal attachments. He forms a relationship based on that understanding, and we're supposed to feel sorry for him when he suddenly wants more and it turns out she isn't the perfect woman and she doesn't run and jump in his arms?
I don't think he was naive, I think he was arrogant. I'm sure there would be several women in his past that he treated just as poorly, if he were real.
He took her to meet his family so she should not have accepted that invitation unless she was going to be honest about hers.
The fact she went implied she was being honest and was single. She didn't wear a ring and certainly behaved as if she was single.
Assumptions, assumptions. First he wanted a no strings affair with no emotional commitment and they both made that clear. He never told her he was feeling differently or was serious now. The girl wondered why someone like him would go to his sister's wedding and he said he just wanted a dance partner and not to be "the guy alone at the bar." Women aren't mind readers. Without telling her anything had changed he had no right to just assume that she had also changed and knew he had changed and suddenly they're supposed to be wildly in love. She was no worse than any average traveling business man has been since time immemorial.
shareI'd say both but it's more on Alex. Alex was purposely being deceptive to avoid talking about her personal life. But at that point, it was still AOK since there were no strings attached.
Ryan was up-front about his personal life though and valid reasons to believe she was the same as him (single). But he should have been more cautious and asked first to avoid the big shock.
Where Alex is responsible is when she accepted going to his sister's wedding and then to visit his old school. This was obviously setting off alarms of 'I want this to become a little more serious' and she needed to set boundaries at that time by refusing. But by accepting these things, she led Ryan to believe 'She's okay with this. I can try to take the next step now.'
And of course, she tries to pin the blame on him, when most of it belongs to her because she was flat out deceptive about being married. He's a big boy though, he should have asked at some point but this goes both ways - she saw the signs he was becoming more serious and she refused to set boundaries to have it both ways, because she knew telling him she was married would mean he'd bolt. She knew what she was doing.
^^Agreed. I don't think he was naïve either, he took her at her word. I agree, she was pretty cold & cruel to him over the phone. He was upfront with her, even taking her to his sister's wedding. I think it's more so on Alex.
"I am the ultimate badass, you do not wanna `*beep*` wit me!"- Hudson in Aliens.
I completely agree with you Koffee. And the poster you agree with.
Acting is behaving truthfully under imaginary circumstances.
- Sanford Meisner
A bit of both, Ryan was definitely naive, but Alex was not cold or cruel to him, just honest. However, it is pretty messed up how fine she is with cheating on her husband
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