Worst film ever made. - Swept Away (2002) Discussion

[–] metalmennace 22 years ago

I'm fascinated by the hatred that continues to loom over this movie. I don't really understand it. It certainly wasn't a good flick but I can think of dozens upon dozens of other movies that are far worse. I think anyone that HATES this movie is just jumping on the 'I-HATE-MADONNA' bandwagon. I hate her too and I don't think that Guy Ritchie is that talented either but at least I'm not accusing people who may have liked it to be intoxicated. You should smoke some maybe you'll calm down.

Pretend it's an indie movie that isn't a remake and pretend that Madonna is someone you've never heard of before. I guarantee you wouldn't have felt so strongly about it. You may have even liked it.

Plus it was great watching Madonna get slapped over and over.

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[–] trilbynhiss 22 years ago

No no no! I refuse to watch either Madonna or Jennifer Lopez in a movie. Call me narrow minded, but both are over-hyped, mediocre "talents." I used to respect Guy Ritchie's work, but he's apparently been henpecked by his wife to include her in his latest projects. She was quoted as saying her only concern was not having any cellulite show... yeah, that shows her priorities about acting, doesn't it? Grrr, some celebrities are just so loathsome, you can't help hating them. She's at the top of my list.

PS... that fake English accent she's affecting in "real" life annoys me too.

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[–] seashellz 22 years ago

Me too...i loath JLo...if she didnt have that ass, she would still be washing dishes at a Dennys' somewhere.
In other words she is a telentless hack that came out of nowhere, going from the bottom to the top in a couple of years-that is NOT the way true talent works.... Maybe fate will be kind and bury her soon, like Paula Abduhl-who cant even land in infomercials these days. BTW, I think the original SWEPT AWAY is a classic...

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[–] sacrednerve 21 years ago

Me too...i loath JLo...if she didnt have that ass, she would still be washing dishes at a Dennys' somewhere.

That is the greatest thing I've heard anyone say here in a long time. I am still laughing.

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[–] 21 years ago

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[–] tynabop 20 years ago

Serious! LOL the only good thing about "J-Lo's" acting in "Jersey Girl" was she died early on!
Denny's- thats funny :)

Hey old man river! Zip it, before I break your hip!~~~~Tyna

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[–] GremlinLenoreDoesHollywood 21 years ago

yeah....the accent is worst.everytime she comes on i have to change the channel.

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[–] LorneTheHost 22 years ago

No, Guy Ritchie is very talented, Lock, stock and two smoking barrels and snatch are brilliant. Snatch being one of the funniest movies ever with some of the best characters i've seen.

Swept Away is simply another thing on the list of why should we put madonna out of her misery, guy only made it for her

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[–] theman1101 22 years ago

Nah, Ritchie sucks. All he did was copy Tarantino's stuff and water it down.

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

I am going to comment on several things I've read in all the previous posts. First, off I have have to say many of you don't make any sense. You say you hate Madonna, yet you go see a movie in which she is starring. One person said he/she refuses to ever see a Madonna movie, yet takes the time to comment on one. If you really didn't care about her, then you wouldn't go out of your way to slam her. You wouldn't even think of her let alone post crude remarks about her or pay money to see her movie. Also, for those who had the pleasure of seeing this in a theater, it was only playing two weeks in a very limited run. What was the rush to see it if you didn't care? Two possible reasons for this unjust animosity are: 1. You actually LIKE Madonna and don't want to admit it so you talk trash in order to force yourself to believe otherwise (or) 2. Quite simply you are jealous. For those who say she has limited talent, you obviously don't know anything about her career. She is not just a singer. She is a phenomenal songwriter. She is an amazing dancer. She is also involved in the production of her music. She has more top 10 singles than the Beatles. She is the most successful, influential, groundbreaking female artist of all-time and so much more. If you can't see that you are dumb or just can't except reality.
Thank You. Goodnight.

"Words/They cut like a knife/ Cut into my life/I don't want to hear your words/They always attack/Please take them all back/If there yours I don't want anymore" -Madonna, "WORDS" (1992)

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[–] justsomeloser 22 years ago

What if they were a fan of Guy Ritche and they wondered if it was a good movie and had nothing better to do, and the reason they are bashing it is because their mad that this movie stole their 6 bucks? I think that would make more sense.

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

So then they would attack Guy Ritchie since he is the one who wrote and directed it. They would leave his lovely wife alone because she is not to blame. The movie would have flopped whether it was Madonna or Meryl Streep. Acting is not the main problem. However, since it is Madonna people blame her just because of her celebrity status. If they are Guy Ritchie fans than it is him who they should blame. He is the captain of this ship. It is he who let them down. Madonna is actually all that kept this film afloat. You should be thanking her for that. Without her this movie would have gone unnoticed.

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[–] justsomeloser 22 years ago

I think these people WANT the movie to go unnoticed. hehe

I just thought it was really weird that you said you'd have to be jealous to hate her. That's wrong. I hate her and I'm not jealous. I just don't like her music, I don't think she's attractive and I think she has too big of an ego.She just bugs me. Why would I want her life? I didn't really get it.
Anyway, people have a right to dislike a movie and I do recall alot of them blaming Guy just as much as Madonna.

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

So if you don't like her then why waste your time making comments on her. So even if you don't like her music is that a reason to HATE a person. Everyone has they're own musical tastes. I completely understand that. If someone says they don't like her music, that's fine. I do think they probably don't know enough about her music to make such a remark, but hey some people can't be saved. As for her not being attractive. WRONG. She IS the most beautiful woman in history. As for the ego comment, if you would like to talk about someone with an ego problem go talk about Michael Jackson. And I never said people don't have a right to dislike a movie. I said to stop bashing Madonna. If you don't like a movie she is in, then talk about the movie. There is direction, writing, music, setting, lighting, other actors. Not just Madonna, Madonna & Madonna. If you didn't like her acting then say so in respectful manner. There is no reason to be so nasty all the time. You are right in saying Guy to get blamed as well, but I was referring to the extremely rude people on imdb. And if someone is jealous about someone else, do you think they would admit it? I think not. If someone isn't into Madonna's music or Madonna, but are constantly bashing her instead of ignoring her, one has to wonder what they are trying to accomplish. All I can think of is they're trying to prove something that don't believe to no one but themself.

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[–] snoman8086 22 years ago

madonno, why are you taking this so personally?

Remember, the internet is "a place where people can get together to share pornography and bitch about movies. There is nothing you can do about it short of going to each and everyone of their houses and beating the s*it out of them."

You can't change people's minds. Just state your opinion and move on.

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[–] cronix 22 years ago

actually, i do believe madonno actually IS madonna. that would make sence wouldent it? we all know she's the Derek Smart of the music industry.

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] elperrosato 20 years ago

Snoman- Total props for the Kevin Smith Reference. For real Madonno 83, don't take this stuff personal if we all have different tastes. It's obvious that a lot of people like Madonna's music and the impact she has made in our popular culture, but even a lot of her fans have trouble with her acting.

Let's be honest about Madonna's movies. With the exception of "Truth or Dare" (which was a documentary), all of Madonnas movies have been panned by critics and hated by everyone but the most dedicated of her fans. Anyone remember that awful "Who's that Girl"? What about the so bad it's almost good "Shanghai Surprise"? (you can't blame bad acting on that one as she co-starred with an oscar winner in that dud). Oooh, and then there was her so bad it's gone past good and back to bad again role in "Dick Tracy"? Or "Body of Evidence", a movie so awful that it almost destroyed Willem Dafoe's career as well? Madonna's only halfway decent movie was "Desperately Seeking Susan" which was made at a time when she was young, fresh, and changing the world. However, 1984 was 20 years ago, and we've had plenty of newer, better looking, better dancing and much more interesting female musicians to gawk at. Yes, Madonna will always have a place in music history (like say, Aretha Franklin or Diana Ross), but for her to keep making movies is beating a dead horse that should have been buried in 1987.

As for Guy Ritchie, I dug his first two movies. They did have a Tarrantino feel to them, but the characters and humor was very unique and had that "ties it all together nicely" feeling that is often missing in movies.

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[–] abc_and_d 19 years ago

Remember, the internet is "a place where people can get together to share pornography and bitch about movies.
Good definition of Internet!

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[–] jesse_olson 22 years ago

i think you're off your bloody rocker my friend

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[–] jesse_olson 22 years ago

(that was to madonno83)

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

I am just a dedicated Madonna fan and I can't stand how harsh people can be when talking about her. If you don't like her then don't waste your time talking about her. People have no consideration for others. If you did not like the movie then say so in a respectable manner. This is not an invitation to Madonna bashing which is tired and old. I'm not saying this was the greatest movie in history, but it is enjoyable. It is not at all what the critics made it out to be. Quite frankly Ebert and Roeper can take their thumbs and stick them up their ass. That goes for every other movies critic as well. I don't need somebody to tell me if a movie is good or bad. I am perfectly capable of making that decision for myself. Besides everybody has different tastes in what they find good. So the real people who are "off their rocker" are those who take posting a review on a movie and turn into an attack on Madonna. What do they hope to gain by doing this. My assumption is that it makes them feel better about themselves and their boring lives. Take it out on a person who has everything they never will. Someone who has worked hard to get where she is. Pure jealousy on their part! Being that every negative review is actually lame Madonna bashing I do question the validity of it. How many people actually saw the movie before posting?

"HATE DESTROYS THE ONE WHO HATES AND EVERYONE SUFFERS THE SAME" -MADONNA "REVENGE"

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[–] tmolthan 22 years ago

The only people who look more foolish than Madonna does in "Swept Away" are her fans who continue to defend this lame excuse of a movie. EVERYBODY else hated it. EVERYBODY. Here are a few quotes from seasoned critics: "If there's one thing worse than a Guy Ritchie film, it's a Guy Ritchie film with Madonna in it"...."What Madonna does in this film can't honestly be called acting; it's more like talking, and moving, and sometimes gesturing, and sometimes all at once"...."In the scene where Pepe finally grows tired of Madonna's whining and smacks her, you want to stand up and shout 'What took you so long?'"...."Madonna's voice in the film resembles a broken, ratchety ambulance siren that begs for medical attention"...."If Madonna washes up on a shore near you, I suggest you throw her back"....

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

Just because you didn't like the movie doesn't mean no one else can. And the only people who look foolish are those who continue to attack Madonna not those who defend her. Other people do it too. I read posts on 8 Mile and if you say anything negative about Eminem you will got a response. Mariah fans defended Glitter. Janet fans defended Poetic Justice. Whitney fans defended Bodyguard. Michael fans defend everything he does. I already said Swept Away isn't the greatest movie. I just think the critics made out to be worse than it could have ever been. The truth of the matter is I wouldn't even be posting anything here if people could just post their differences in a polite manner. I don't care if you like the movie or not. It's the Madonna bashing that makes me so defensive. I would prefer to just ignore the stupity that is posted, but unfortunately I can't. I have a question for tmolthan. Let me make myself clear by first saying that I am not attacking you. I read in another post of yours you said that you USED to like Madonna and hoped she would make in films but it is obvious that will never happen. Does that mean that you turned your back on the music because of her tainted film career. By the way Swept Away got a good review in Entertainment Weekly. Thank you. Goodnight.

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[–] tmolthan 22 years ago

I am no longer a Madonna fan because, in both her movies (always) and now her music, she seems to think that "just because she's Madonna", that should be enough. Anyone who is that smugly self-satisfied is a major turn-off to me, and apparently MANY others. And to the fans who say "people unfairly criticize her movies because she's so famous for her music and they don't want someone to be a superstar of both" is pure hogwash. Have these people never heard of Elvis Presley, Barbra Streisand, Diana Ross, Bing Crosby, and the dozens of other legendary singers who "made it" in the movies? SORRY...nice try...

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

First of Barbra Streisand and Diana Ross don't have nearly the same status as Madonna. They have never had the same impact in their music as Madonna. Both of their careers have faded. Diana Ross hasn't done anything noteworthy since the early 80's and she hasn't made that many movies to begin with. In terms of music Barbra Streisand is nothing more than a voice. Her style of singing is all about "look how well I can hold a note for 10 minutes" That's all she does is sing. Her concerts consist of her standing there singing. She has not conquered the music world like Madonna. So people except her as an actress. They don't have a preconceived image of what she should be like. Bing Crosby is from the 40's and music world from then and now has changed greatly. Besides that practically ever movie he did was a musical. Elvis is your only strong point. However this is a male dominated world. Women have to work harder to prove themselves capable of anything. Eminem makes his first movie and every critic raves about it when he is playing himself. The same reason that justified Madonna's good performance in DSS. And also Elvis'movies seemed to be mostly musicals. As for your reasons for not liking Madonna anymore, let me say she has worked hard to get where she is and deserves to be proud of her accomplishments. Her music is still brilliant and fresh and MANY MANY people agree. It is unfortunate you feel they way you do about someone who has never personally criticized you on the way you live your life. If you are turned off by her as you said they why bother seeing Swept Away to begin with. That does not show disinterest. If you are disinterested then don't go see her movies, change the channel if you see her on tv, change the station on the radio, flip past any article on her in magazine. Don't read, listen or watch and then dwell on it.

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[–] tmolthan 22 years ago

As everyone reading this exchange, Madonna fans can make up an excuse for EVERYTHING. She's not exactly like this one or exactly like that one; GIVE ME A BREAK!!! All the people I mentioned (oh, yeah I also forgot Frank Sinatra), were HUGE superstars known as celebrities because they were singers BEFORE they made films...that's all anybody knew them as and it didn't stop them in movies. Of course, you will argue with this and try to illustrate the differences while ignoring the similarities. Never mind that Diana Ross paved the way for all the divas that followed, and in her VERY FIRST film was Oscar-nominated for playing Billie Holiday in "Lady Sings The Blues" for only one reason: BECAUSE SHE WAS GOOD. What is so sad about your blind defense of Madonna's acting is that you, like the people around her, aren't really her friend. If she had any real friends (and she obviously doesn't) is that if she did, the one true friend would say (as true friends are supposed to and should): "Look, I love you, but you suck!". If this doesn't make sense to you, then you don't have any more real friends than Madonna does. AND THAT'S THE SAD THING....

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[–] madonno83 22 years ago

As I already said for someone who hates Madonna you sure spend a great deal of time talking about. Maybe you should get YOURSELF some friends. I have plenty. And who are you to say Madonna has no friends. Do you know her personally? Everything you said is bs. You can keep saying all Madonna fans can keep defending her. But what about Madonna bashers such as yourself? Of course you are going to tear her apart for everything she does by making up excuses. For someone who hates Madonna you do have an unhealthy obsession over her. I would look into psychiatric treatment if I were you. Your life is what is really the sad thing. I look foward to response which I know won't be long.

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[–] tmolthan 22 years ago

There you go, people. It's up here for everyone to see. The righteous commentator who begs everyone not to judge anyone "they don't know personally" has just proved the only person they are asking everyone not to attack is Madonna, yet they don't hesitate to attack me, even though they don't know me personally either. Pretty much speaks for itself. I'll be sitting here, waiting for Madonna to rush to your defense as quickly and blindly as you rushed to hers; don't hold your breath, SUCKER!!!!!!!

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[–] Aphostile 21 years ago

Even though I'm not a fan of R&B, many of Madonna's concepts and her successful, but not terribly creative approach towards staying musically relevant by adopting and incorporating the latest trends into her music- I will give credit where it's due.

She's a talented singer and dancer, but she just can't act. She should stick to musicals since she did well with the one she was in and they've been making money lately.

She seems to be the sort that will just keep plugging away when told she can't do something so I won't be surprised if we'll see more train wrecks. The only good performance she ever delivered in a film was in Evita. Her delivery of spoken lines is just too wooden and uninspired.

I find it surprising in a way because often singers can make for at least passable actors. She understands how to put spirit into her singing voice, but for some reason she can't put that into her acting. If she could, she would have by now. She's certainly had enough opportunities. I'm not jealous of her success or anyone's for that matter. More power to her.

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[–] MoonsofJupiter 22 years ago

How can it be that you don't like Barbra Streisand???????

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[–] xander-cane 19 years ago

You think Madonna bashing is old and lame? Your critic arguement is worse. Critics don't exist to tell you what to watch, they aren't forcing you to listen to them or agree with them. This isn't A Clockwork Orange, Ebert is not tying you to a chair, peeling your eyes open, and forcing you to watch a movie.

Your argument that people shouldn't bash things on the internet they didn't like is also a tired argument. Your defending her to people that didn't like her performance is just as or more pathetic then whining on the internet. People have a right to have an opinion and share it with other who agree.

By the way, having a Madonna quote in your posts and having an unoriginal already taken name based off of her isn't going to help you in the eyes of the 'bashers'. You come across as completely blinded and hypnotised by Madonna like she could *beep* in a jewel case, sell it to you, and you would worship it saying it is the best music ever made. You claim everyone bashing her are probably just jealous but if anything that is you. Your izolization of a celebrity that is long past her expiration date is just kind of... sad.

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[–] adora_sakura 19 years ago

i've actually met her.. and a relative of mine used to work for her for many many years... she has NO ego.. she's very down to earth.. and believe it or not.. Sweet. my relative has worked with a lot of celebrities.. but Madonna was one of her favorites because of that. However.. the people who manage her.. around her are all .. evil, greedy, dishonest, manipulative people. Her personal secretaries included, they used to steal the hefty tips Madonna ordered to give to employees. Madonna is pretty clueless to it all though. She's pretty trusting of everyone...

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[–] xander-cane 19 years ago

Madonna defenitely kept "A Certain Sacrafice" a float...

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[–] curlygurl1482 19 years ago

Mmmmm, I think the only reason people saw this movie is because it was a rainy saturday during the winter and it was the only thing on satellite. Or they were in the middle of lunch and just needed some sort of minor entertainment until they finished eating.

I know those are the only reasons I saw it, I don't know why anyone would rush to the movies to see it. I knew her acting sucked, but I do like her music.

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[–] 19 years ago

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[–] 19 years ago

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[–] pennyneeds 19 years ago

Look dear, We'll try to make this as simple as we can.
Madonna makes good records that we all like to spin around to dizzily, getting all giddy.
Madonna does not have any acting ability. She is dreadful and should stop it.

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[–] 19 years ago

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[–] ewalls-2 22 years ago

I have to agree with a couple of points made by Lego"my ego"las here...yeah, the film wasn't brilliant and yes, the visuals weren't breathtaking...but honestly..what did you expect?

For the most part, Madonna was decent...she did slip up on some lines, but that should have been expected. She was absolutely sexy..which helped. The sexual tension was not very immanent, as you hinted. I felt awkward trying to sympathize with their relationship at the end...not much of a relief when they finally "fell in love".

I wouldn't recommend the movie, but if you happen to rent it, don't feel bad for doing do..but, try not to set high expecations. Also, don't expect this to be much like the previous films by Guy Ritchie. Our friend Lego here went a little overboard on his review....he seems to have too much time on his hands and too much tension stored inside of himself. The beauty of cinema is it's ability to produce less than brilliant work...Calm down and move on buddy.

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] patterwing 22 years ago

Potent, indeed.
Poor Guy Ritchie. Because he married her, he's got to put her in his films. Because she's also buffer than he is, she would probably beat him if he refused.

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] patterwing 22 years ago

EXCUSE me for my incorrect grammar: Madonna is "more buff" than Guy Ritchie. Are you satisfied? No, I am honestly not offended. You just must be very bored. To cure your boredom, I recommend that you go to Denny's, steal all of the forks, and escape through the bathroom window.

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[–] gsiebert 22 years ago

If you are so bored then why don't you spend your time to do something
productive like improving your spelling skills ("grammer")...

And though I realise that I am doing the same thing with you, I just
have to say that I don't understand why people are picking on others'
imperfections. Does it make you feel good? Don't you have a more positive
approach to life than that?

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[–] Insane2986 22 years ago

http://www.suntimes.com/ebert/ebert_reviews/2002/10/101105.html

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[–] Howlin Wolf 21 years ago

... and I'll make up my own mind before I listen to Ebert, ta.

Howlin Wolf (TM)

I said "Always" because 'True love never dies'.

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[–] madonnamaniac 22 years ago

It might just be me, or is everyone in this forum coming out with reasons why they hate Madonna and not really talking about Swept Away as a film? I mean, what does Paula Abdul or J-Lo's tush have to do with Swept Away? And whats with the people who are writing stuff like "Well Madonna's a good songwriter"? What does that have to do with this movie? And then there's the peeps saying Madonna has no friends... :-S

I thought the imdb was for opinions on movies, not the actors personal lives...

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] daChiLLy 22 years ago

aaaallllright now... I didn't read but up to about half of the thread, but there are some things that those who hate this film (...count me in, then ^^) should be aware of as well as the madonna-fiends:

- (dis)liking certain kinds of music is a question of personal taste and
therefore not something to argue about.

- SO IS BEAUTY!

- acting is different: being an actor myself, I reckon myself totally
justified when saying that Madonna IS a bad actress. There might be worse
ones in 80's horror-flicks, but Madonna severely lacks skill, though ;-D

- Guy Ritchie impressed me with "Lock, stock and two smoking barrels" as well
as "Snatch" (actually, I prefer the latter), but "Swept Away" is a disgrace
to his art. Might be, because there isn't any Tarantino-beach-movie he could
steal from ^^

...so long,
ChiLLy

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] ace_erath 19 years ago

dude... are you like 9 or something? do you honestly believe that anyone thinks you misspelled GRAMMER (sic) on purpose? that's just dumb
you obviously don't get out much

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[–] ace_erath 19 years ago

dude... are you like 9 or something? do you honestly believe that anyone thinks you misspelled GRAMMER (sic) on purpose? that's just dumb
you obviously don't get out much

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[–] ThrillzillA 22 years ago

I don't want to get personal with Madonna...or maybe I do. But I can't stand her. All of a sudden she was talking with a Britsh accent. And her videoclips, man she tries desperately to make her videoclips controversial just to get people to watch them. And she absolutely made a horrible James Bond theme. Not only that I think she is not pretty so she should stop wearing tight clothes. I only liked madonna in a Leaque of their own.

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[–] 22 years ago

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[–] sgtslut 22 years ago

I'm gonna keep this short....Swept Away was the worst film of 2002....Guy Ritchie is possibly the worst filmmaker of his generation.....I hated Snatch, I hated Lock Stock.....and wouldn't you know it, I hated Swept Away....any thoughts on a Razzie lifetime achievement award for Mr. Ritchie?

You will suffer a fate worse than death...you will become a legend - Alphaville

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[–] theymbg 22 years ago

well, it looks like good ole Mr. Ritchie is throwing in the towel and accepting his status as a one trick pony that was lucky enough to get to perform his trick twice for international audiences...

Snatch 2: Guy Ritchie is looking to do a sequel with Brad Pitt expressing interest in returning according to Moviehole http://www.moviehole.net/

"Kiri, Kiri" - Asami Yamazaki

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[–] Howlin Wolf 21 years ago

Snatch 2: Guy Ritchie is looking to do a sequel with Brad Pitt expressing interest in returning according to Moviehole

Oh, Please God, no!!

Howlin Wolf (TM)

I said "Always" because 'True love never dies'.

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