Is it realistic?

Is the gay relationship played realistically? I found I could totally relate to it but I don't know if it was a good representation

Good question. A thorough answer would require a scene-by-scene analysis, as it's kind of hit-and-miss, but in general (and from an American perspective), no, it's not very realistic. Especially for the time period in which it was made, and the age of the characters.
Firstly, this "closeted but curious school jock/stud" fantasy figure is just that - every closeted schoolboy's WILDEST fantasy. These creatures are EXTREMELY rare in the wild, and even if you do happen to stumble upon one, it's very unlikely that his first serious "experimentation" would be with the mercifully teased, barely pubescent, cute-ish nerd AT HIS OWN SCHOOL. That is very much against the "rules." As Steven's friend Wendy said, "You have to be more discreet . . . people aren't stupid."
Secondly, by the time we join the story, the jock's "mates" would have suspected something (as would the girlfriend). Parents, on the other hand, are tricky . . . you just never know, but you should never underestimate the power of denial.
Third, the cliched "hag" BGF (although played wonderfully by Charlotte Britain) is also a dead giveaway.
And the biggest unrealistic scene of all is - of course - the "coming out" scene. Even though it's sincere and well-acted, it's highly doubtful that coming out in front of your entire town and school at a school assembly would be quite as sweetly liberating as portrayed here.

I suppose I had a little more empathy for the John character, as we were seeing what his life is going to be like - constant pretending/sneaking/lying/falling in love and having to end it badly - over something he really can't control, while Steve seems like the type who would go on to be very happy.

That said, I enjoyed the movie for what it was - and was somewhat surprised that it came from England - a notoriously homophobic society. "Beautiful Thing" is a less "mainstreamed and glamourized," more realistic vision of the situation (the characters don't look like Abercrombie models, nor do they live in huge houses with pools in the English countryside).

All in all, very much worthwhile - everyone gets an A- for effort, but . . . no, not very realistic.

I also found it interesting how the actors ended up. Ben Livingstone went on to become so well-educated it's ridiculous (several degrees from Cambridge, Oxford, London School of Economics - some of the best schools in the world - now practicing law in London). I believe Groton is still in the TV/Movie world in Britain.

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This movie was earth shattering realistic to me as it was to many people I have met through this blog over many years.

Ben Silverstone, in an interview for Attitude Magazine 2009, said that much of his mail was about how the movie had affected the lives of the viewers and how it had helped them with their own lives as it has done with mine. Patrick Wilde is a skilled writer and Simon shore a superb director. It is now being shown occasionally in London. It is on Netflix and Amazon prime.

To sum it up, I was perusing YouTube in 2013, stumbled onto this movie and It reached out and grabbed me like nothing has ever done in my life. It has taken several years to back off to normalcy and continue my life without obsession. And that's the truth.

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This is an archived web site at its peak of activity showing the enthusiasm for this movie:

http://wayback.archive.org/web/20050206180106/http://bensilverstone.net/bsfanfiction.asp

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