MovieChat Forums > My Girl (1991) Discussion > Why do people have open casket funerals?

Why do people have open casket funerals?

posted 14 years ago by jenni_doll_1
30 replies | jump to latest

I've always believed it just makes it more traumatic for the mourners and I think it's especially inappropriate for a child's funeral. I can understand a viewing the day before the burial, but the service should be a solemn, respectful occasion. The "where's his glasses" scene has to about the saddest thing I've ever seen in a movie. I suppose as a movie goes, it was good for adding to the emotional effect, but things like what Vada did in that scene, do happen in real life. I've heard of people completely losing it and trying to pull the dead person out of the casket. Funerals are emotionally trying enough for the survivors without having to see something like that. My husband had a cousin he was raised with for six years who died at 10 in a hit and run accident, and after attending his funeral, my husband was unable to attend funerals for years after seeing the emotional trauma of all the adults breaking down in front of the open casket. His cousin's mom was so hysterical she reached in the boy's casket and shook him so hard his jaw broke, it was a horrible thing to watch. I would never want an open casket funeral, it makes the experience more difficult than necessary.

[–] SweetLady03 12 years ago

It depends on what the family wants, but a lot of times people have open caskets for closure. When I was a child a friend of mine died in a horrible car accident and her parents were a complete mess, but the funeral director advised an open casket because they would never except her death unless they saw her in it. Her parents were completely inconsolable and in denial about her death until the wake. Her father tried to take her out of the casket, it was one of the worst experiences I had to witness but the funeral director was right. Her parents needed to see her one last time or they may never have accepted that the was gone.

[–] veil182 12 years ago

OP I have to agree...it's obviously up to the family and I don't think it is "weird" or "creepy," but I hate that the last image of some of my friends/family is their dead body laying there, totally dead in funeral makeup. close that shi t please

[–] SayNoToRemakes 12 years ago

I have been to many funerals, and the only ones that had a closed casket were situations where the body couldn't be displayed due to fire, bad car accident, etc.

It's totally up to the family, and I highly recommend making your plans before you pass on if it's important to you. If I can't do my own hair and makeup, I don't want a bunch of people looking at me dead. I've given my family a list of invitees who can view my remains if they so desire, but I do not want to be put on display for people I haven't seen in years.

I'm 54 and could die today or 50 years from now. But my family knows what do when it's my time.

[–] TwinkiePon 11 years ago

I agree that it's creepy. I can't stand open caskets and I always have to have someone go up with me to view.
My grandfather did not look like himself. Neither did this young man in my church who died - now he was in an accident so I don't know how much reconstruction they might have had to do, but they made his skin WAY too dark (he was Filipino and they gave him almost a black skin tone), the glue they used to keep his eyes closed was all over his lashes and for some reason he was wearing gloves, which was just weird.
I guess for some perhaps seeing that person one more time gives them closure, and everyone is different and needs to grieve in their own way. But for me, I like to remember people as they were in life and not the way they look in death.

[–] theDut 11 years ago

My step-grandfather had a closed casket, and two years later, another grandfather had an open one. The casket was in a viewing room where people could see him if they chose, but when the casket was moved into the congregational hall for the service, it was closed. I do prefer open because it gives me one last chance to see the departed at peace. My grandfather that had the open casket didn't really look like himself either, especially since he had become very emaciated by the time he passed, but his unique hands looked exactly the same as they always did. In a way, I was glad that I was able to "hold" his hand one last time before he was buried.

[–] usersince03 10 years ago

None of my grandparents who are now deceased had an open casket funeral and to be honest I didn't want to see them in an open-casket, I want to remember them as they were.

[–] TeenGangDeb 9 years ago

A "wake" is a really old tradition that gives the person a chance to "wake up" in case they aren't really dead. Nowadays it's obvious they are dead, especially when embalmed. The whole Western funeral process is really overdone.

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Love means never having to say you're ugly. - The Abominable Dr. Phibes

[–] MusicLover3889 (314) 7 years ago

My grandpas friend was cremated, so all he had was an urn.