Favorite Wings Quotes
Lowell: "How long has Helen been a hooker?"
Massive storm on the island, and the house Joe and Brian grew up in is about to fall into the sea. Roy's informing Joe the house was condemned by the town council and they're tearing it down -- says it's no big deal.
Joe: "It is a big deal, it's my old house!"
Roy: "Well you didn't see me cry when they tore down the house where I spent my childhood."
Joe: "That's because it was a House of Pancakes Roy, there's a chain of 'em."
That was such a funny exchange because Joe so rarely 'went there'.
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Wait a minute... who am I here?
You're absolutely right. Any time Daly got a great line like that it was amped up by the tiny shock of his character crossing his own boundaries.
Even though all of them were incredible of course, across the board I've always thought Weber was the funniest of all the actors; on top of the swift delivery skills he shares with the rest of the cast*, his physical humor was just incredible -- picture him doing that quick little jig in the episode where Joe's unsure about pretending to be injured... uggh, always gets me! But even though I think Weber was the funniest, I find Daly's little lines to be some of the best because it almost looks like it pains Joe to say those things.
* Speaking of delivery, picture Alex at the lunch counter and Helen behind it, going on about how desperate she is for a table at sold-out La Maison for dinner with Davis. Lowell gets on the lunch counter wall phone and calls La Maison to try to schmooze a table out of them by speaking French, and he's on hold...
Alex: "Lowell, I didn't know you were bilingual."
Lowell: "Oh I'm not. I'm just being friendly to the guy because I need a table."
This is the quick, subtle stuff that gets me time and again with this show... such impeccable timing and delivery from these people. (And the credulity THChurch exudes doesn't hurt!) So many others shows/casts try to pull this stuff off and it either lays there flat or is just so belabored.
"Marriage Italian Style"
In the airport at Helen's lunch counter:
Sconset Sal: "Hey, I ain't the Holiday Inn!" (after plucking lice/tick/flea out of her hair, squashing it, and flicking it into the air)
At Helen and Antonio's "wedding":
Sconset Sal: "You kin sit there and pretend like you don't know me, but that New Year's Eve was the best night o' yur life!"
Roy: "Give me a break! I was young and impetuous. It was a lifetime ago!"
Sconset Sal: "'Twas last year!!!"
Too funny! Susan Tyrell was a scream!!
ANYTHING written by Christopher Lloyd!! And that cast could ALWAYS deliver it!!
shareJoe to Helen, in the elevator: "How can you even think of marrying Lynch, having children with him? That's OUR marriage. Those are OUR children. That's OUR life."
Brisn: "Helen, you're a woman."
Helen: "That's the rumor."
Alex: "I've been to boot camp. I can hurt you."
Lewis: "I'm a salesman. No, you can't."
Brian: Try me mime something
I just like how he said that line and his face expression.
Then later when when joe trys to get out the door but he acts like the wind is pushing him back.
*Someone's a@@ is ringing and it aint mine*
From an episode in Season One,
Joe to Brian (in his office): If "if's" and "but's" were candy and nuts, we'd all have a wonderful Christmas...
I didn't take the time to read all the previous ones to see if this had been used yet.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Ron G. from Sunny (& Hot!) Orlando, Florida
Antonio - I have managed once again to sneak in just below the poverty line
sharefrom the final season.
Lou: "Am I boring you?"
Brian: "No Lou, please tell us again about the Great Cole Slaw scare of '62."
"Blow it ouchyer ear, Reiger..!" Louie De Palma
"Coffee is for closers." Blake
Okay...one more. From when Alex was on the show and Brian was trying to get back with her, singing from the terminal mic;
Brian: "I just found oooouuuut......that nothing ryhmes with Alex......wait......no......nothing ryhmes with Alex."
So funny........lol
"Blow it ouchyer ear, Reiger..!" Louie De Palma
"Coffee is for closers." Blake
I know this has been said....But I think the song Brian sang to Alex was one of the funniest scene of all 8 seasons.
Gosh, there were so many funny lines....it's hard to pick just one.
This is not a quote, but one of my favorite scenes is when Lowell is trying to decide to go into the witness protection program......the serious convo that him and Joe had.
Lowelly
Joey
I love that Brian called them that
Roy: "He forgot to say Simon says."
shareLowell: I wonder if Mr.T is related to Mr.Coffee?
Roy: I wonder if your mother is related to your father?
Lowell: I wonder if Mr.T is related to Mr.Coffee?
Roy: I wonder if your mother is related to your father?]]
A good one..
Lowell to Joe: I need to speak to you in private
Brian to Lowell: it is okay. You can speak to Joe in front of me because there is nothing which I dont have to explain to him later!
or Brian about Joe: meet Moogli, the jungle boy!
Brian: "It's not like she sold rap music."
"Blow it ouchyer ear, Reiger..!" Louie De Palma
"Coffee is for closers." Blake
Be there or be stupid...Lowell, you can be both
shareI like the one where Brian and/or Joe are waiting at the top of the Pru for Carol (or was it when Joe was chasing Helen?), and the security guard talks about all the things he's seen up there over the years, and pats his gun and says "I've even had to use this baby a couple of times".
"How long have you worked here?"
"Oh, I don't work here." and he wanders away.
Lowell (about his wife Bunny): She's the U-word.
Joe: The U-word?
Lowell: Unsatiable
Joe: That's the I-word, Lowell.
Lowell: No, the I-word is Indiscreet.
I also really loved that "Happiest man I've ever seen" quote someone else mentioned by Joe about the picture of Casey's husband sailing away from her. The way he delivered it was so good.
"I've got a video camera that shoots in the dark."
"I've got a gun that does the same thing."
When Joe is taking care of Helen because she had her wisdom teeth pulled:
"Can you do one thing for me? Can you say 'You have dishonored the Corleone family?"
"Once, when I was out of underwear..."
"I'm Mark. Your waiter. From the Crab House. I served you. Crabs."
What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.
"Old soldiers never die, they just Faye Duvaye"
Joe and Helen are arguing over thier wedding plans and he tells her "You're just going to have to compromise" and she replies "I already have"
Roy trying to convince Sylvia that she still loves him "Your lips say no, but your eyes... well, they say no, too. Your husband is a plastic surgeon, who knows what your eyes are really saying!"
I don't have an opinion. The word "opinion" implies the possibility I'm wrong.
all 17 pages and none of these...these are some of my faves!
When Brian and Joe confront Alex, thinking she is playing them against each other:
Brian: "We are the Hackett Brothers, do you have any idea what that means?"
Alex (With a complete dumb look): "I think it has something to do with cough drops?"
Antonio discussing his family:
Antonio: "Scarpacci men reach their adult height at age 13. The rest of our growth is just...Hair!" The look on his face is priceless.
And Lowell's Christmas song:
Lowell: "A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight...walkin in my winter underwear!"
"End of Line"
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