The first 20 or so minutes is some of the best stoner comedy material ever. How about:
"Hey you wanna get high, man?"
"Does Howdy Doody got wooden balls, man?"
"I even smoked that tied stick."
"Tied stick?"
Yeah you know, that stuff that's tied to a stick."
"I could probably smoke this whole joint, man, and still walk away."
"What's your name?"
"....Isn't it on there on the license man?"
"Uh, his name is RAAALPH, man."
This...is my SIGNATURE!!!
"I'm not lookin' at your neck!"
shareI hope your dick is bigger than that man.
A week. A d-d-d-day. A weekday.
_______________________
Guacamole in my choos
the opening scene w/chong and his parents, classic...
DAD, cool and calm: "son..(deep breath) your mother and me would like for you to cozy up to the finkelstein boy, he's, eh, a bright kid, and, eh, he's going to miltary school, and...remember he was an eagle scout-..."
MOM: "Arnold, he's a retard-"
DAD, PUSHED and P!SSED: "WOULD YOU SHUTUP!...WE'RE NOT GOING TO HAVE A FAMILY BRAWL!"
and lastly
DAD, FED UP and LIVID: "...YOU GET A G0DD@MN JOB BEFORE SUNDOWN OR WE'RE SENDING YOU OFF TO MILTARY SCHOOL WITH THAT G0DD@MN FINKELSTEIN SHYT KID!... SON OF A B!TCH!"
check it out...a must-see and best son-of-a-b!tch ever...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TS1v7m6tgs0
"LED ZEPPELIN!"
shareI think Chong belching at the blender alone made me LOL!
"I'm going to really enjoy this."
- Jud, The Badass Indian (Lust For Freedom)
and lastly
DAD, FED UP and LIVID: "...YOU GET A G0DD@MN JOB BEFORE SUNDOWN OR WE'RE SENDING YOU OFF TO MILTARY SCHOOL WITH THAT G0DD@MN FINKELSTEIN SHYT KID!... SON OF A B!TCH!"
check it out...a must-see and best son-of-a-b!tch ever...
"Start out with strawberries and you can work your way up to those GOD DAMNED BANANAS!! WHEN, BOY, WHEN... ARE YOU GOING TO GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER??!!!!!"
"BUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPP!!!"
"Oh good God almighty me. I think he's the antichrist."
When the cop that pulled them over gets high as he walks to their van and says "What do you want?" when he approaches the driver's window.
shareYou just did the most acid I've ever seen anybody eat in my life!
Hey, man, I never had no acid before, man.
Jeez, I hope you're not busy for about a month...
How do the angels get to sleep when the Devil leaves his porch light on?
"Hey man, am I driving okay?"
"I think you're parked, man."
And I can't quote the whole thing, but that part where Cheech is manning the police dispatch is hilarious... "This is hardhat." "Lardass?" "No, hardhat; hardhat!" "Okay, Lardass." Or something like that, lol.
James: You ain't high, man??
Chong: No, man. You must get high on lawn clippings, jack, cause this ain't weed.
James: Awww, Our partner Curtis came through for us, man. I'm ANNIHILATED.
Hey, man, if we're gonna wear uniforms, let's all wear something different.
This is the new cut. Y'all be bad.