1. EVERYBODY worships the devil except you
2. All cars explodes when the flip
3. In this universe, there are no interstates, only small 2 lane highways!
4. Devil worshippers are far more socially connected and resourceful than I initially imagined.
5. The smallest of small-town libraries stocks reference books with graphic illustrations of pagan rituals (see also The Wicker Man 1973).
I think we're the green thingy.
ha this thread points out alot of funny things. This is the type of thing I know we do to movies of today, those teen flick horrors since the formula is all the same these days. im wondering if they thought the same back then
shareMore believable in The Wicker Man as the Island was a Pagan community.
share6. If you're a hot chick in a bathing suit, you'll only have men staring at you if they're Satanic and want you dead.
Elements of the past and the future, combining to make something not quite as good as either.
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Oooh, this is fun!
11. When you pull your R.V. over for some Martini's, a ring of flames suddenly erupts around it for seemingly no apparent reason and everyone from the Satanic villiages around Texas managed to follow you without you even noticing.
No matter how far you drive, Amarillo is still unreachable.
No. But if you've ever been there, you know it should be.
convenience stores will sell shotguns to anyone passing through.
Never been to Texas, have you? Back then you could buy a trunk of .45s, anywhere from the local Guns & Drug Store to Myrtle's Beauty Emporium and Target Range.
4 people can wrestle around in an RV with 2 rattlesnakes for 5 minutes and not get fatally bit
It helps when the driver stubbornly refuses to apply the brakes and keeps hurtling down the highway at 65 mph until he hits a tree.
Hysterical screaming accomplishes even less than I previously thought.
Lara Parker accomplished a career out of it. That, and she makes Loretta Swit look like a bulldog in comparison.
--Oh, and one addition for the list:
When you are sitting in the RV outlining your plan for bringing in the Amarillo police to find the dead body and boasting about how you'll fix the satanists good--and you're also worried the guy fixing your broken rear window might actually overhear your plans and make things turn out really bad--THEN make sure you close the porous plastic screen because THAT will stop him from hearing you for SURE!
14. If ever you are in need of a makeshift weapon and only have the choice between a ski pole and a toothbrush, choose the toothbrush.
share15. Always pull over and stop on roads you aren't familiar with to have a good stiff drink when they are still out to get you. Cheers!
Mommy to two little monsters
16. 4 people can wrestle around in an RV with 2 rattlesnakes for 5 minutes and not get fatally bit
17. When you're hiding from Satanists in an RV you can lock the door to protect yourself even though earlier the Satanists were snashing windows to get in.
I got beat to number 12 on this list.
I might add:
Never EVER stop your vacation, even for human sacrifices;
Ignore the fact that school busses ARE, in fact used for sunday schools/churches, so ram that ol' car to make way;
When a creepy, overly friendly couple invites you to a bar-brawl, leave somebody with the dog....besides SATAN, that is.
Don't take a wuss lotsa-appsole mini dog w/ you...one word: PITBULL.
just a few elaborations on previous items learned:
-It's also not a good idea to stop off in some middle of nowhere rest stop to drink martinis, even if you are near Amarillo, especially since that's exactly the kind of place all your troubles started out at.
-Gun shop owners are not satanists, they're the only ones you CAN trust.
now a few originals:
-Follow the regular vacation crowds, better to be a follower than a leader in this case. Dead of winter is NOT a prime vacation time.
-NEVER stop driving
-satanists don't fit our initial stereotypes. They can be friendly, republican, trailer park neighbors that love steak, beer, country music and bar-brawls.
Peace is not the absence of affliction, but the presence of God. ~Author Unknown
Hysterical screaming accomplishes even less than I previously thought.
The rock in the stream will only become an obstacle when you are running (or driving) for your life.
- If you see a school bus on a Sunday, don't 'believe' it and floor it.
- Satanist prefer RV's with real wood.
- Never leave your dirt bikes unattended when there's satanist around.