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My heart melts for a different reason, I am using this movie to try to understand what's happening and as a medication and explanation.. but so far, it seems to be mostly just a silly comedy. However, I love the private detective guy, he's extremely sleazy! The actor nails the role.
That would have been a seriously good idea!
Yeah, that was a really weird scene that I didn't quite understand.
In a normal world, this kind of thing shouldn't be such a big deal. It's just basically gentle caressing of a body part for awhile, nothing earthshaking.
And yet in this kind of a world, it certainly feels very weird that she just lets him do it. Maybe I missed something in the movie, but wouldn't her first reaction be something like 'yaaaan! (sorry for the japanese, I don't know the english equivalent), what are you asking??' (while covering her bosom with her hands out of protective reflex)
I am half curious to perform a survey of this type, just asking females if momentary caressing of their bosom would be deemed acceptable, and then seeing what answers come back. I am guessing there would be at least SOME unconsented slappage involved from the women towards the asker's sensitive cheeks, unless the asker has very quick reflexes and a self-preservation instinct.
The thing about Rubik's Cube is that it's really a 'party trick'. It's explained in the manual that comes with it. 'Solving' it is not necessarily a measure of intelligence - once you know how to do it, you can do it every time.
Sorry to burst anyone's cube-shaped bubble, but solving a Rubik's Cube is not a sign of genius.
That's exactly it. The rubbing ONE out only calms the hormones down for awhile, so that 'human interaction' can actually be possible. If there's rubbing THREE or FOUR out, then I'd see the point that the fourth or fifth might be a bit of a struggle.
Rubbing out only one doesn't prevent a future coitus the same night in any way, even if it is to happen within the next hour or 30 minutes.
Once a day?! I salute you. I could never limit myself like that.(And I just meditated 2,5 months in a row, every morning)
You obviously don't understand men's sex drive.
Also, you think homosexuality and goats are preferable to a simple and quick self-satisfaction?
It can thus be helpful in removing an obstacle that would hinder the process otherwise.
However, if you are shy and it's hard for you to talk to women, rubbing one out might actually make you even less able to talk to women, and thus might be detrimental to your mating goal.
So it all depends on various factors, even the mood, the moon phase, how much coffee you have had, have you meditated, what kind of wingmen you have, how much alcohol is in your bloodstream, and so on and so forth.
Of course in the end, it's going to be a win-win-situation. If you manage to get laid, you will experience a small euphoria that lasts for whole hours!
If you don't manage to do it, you avoided an incalculable danger that might have ruined your life in the form of STD, pregnancy, false accusation, or worse; a long-term relationship with all the nagging and limitations that come with it, or the worst: a marriage.
So in one way, it's true, that releasing your pressure balances your hormones and clears your head and you can more freely focus on nonsexual things to talk about, and be more in control of what you say and do.
On the other hand, you won't have an urging drive to push you forward and to force you to 'get some', because as far as your biology is concerned, you already got some, so that drive can now sleep until it's needed again.
It of course depends on how big and powerful your libido is. If you hardly ever think about naughty things anyway, it's not gonna make much of a difference, but if all you see are curvy protusions and cavernous bodies in your mind's eye when you try to talk to women, it's not going to help the seduction process, unless you are a natural alpha or a celebrity.
So if your libido is on overdrive without doing that, doing it will help balance it out and come down from the lustful madness enough to be able to talk.
Well, this thing is not a simple as all that. It can be thought from many angles, and I for one, can't decide, which angle is the best. Perhaps it's not a 'one-size-fits-all'-solution, but depends on the people, libido and behaviour alteration power of onania.
From ONE perspective, people need to be hungry to go gather food, so be effective (think of cavemen running in a forest trying to forage food). After eating, you get to be sleepy and think, 'why bother, it's just food'. But when you have no food and you are hungry, you are really focused in getting that food.
It's the same for mates - if you have just satiated your urges, you have no 'biological reason' to acquire a mate for the night (or the week, year, life, whatever the case may be), so you are not going to be very effective in attracting, searching for, selecting and picking up / seducing a mate. Your biology is not congruent with your now purely intellectual (or perhaps partially emotional) choice, so you are going to come off as insignifigant or boring in that game.
But if you think it from ANOTHER perspective; when your hormones are raging and your wood is up, it's hard to have a proper conversation with another human being, it's hard to be witty with all your blood packed to the lower portion, it's difficult talking in a civilized way about travels and expanding your horizons, when all you can think of is various female curves and body parts, and when various pumping activities fulfill your imagination, as your eyes rudely and without anyone's consent caress the other people's clothes and would penetrate deeper if they could.
So when you want to chat up women, talk with them, be witty, use your intellect and brain power, and display your amazing, charming personality, your brain can be a bit disconnected while your naughty bits take over your thoughts and imagination, and you will look like a caveman, only able to say 'urgh' or 'vaggy', when asked a question about today's political landscape.
) .. but if you take the movie's message symbolically and metaphorically, and not directly and literally, and apply it to real life, then it's a pretty accurate description of the MADNESS the men's loneliness and women's sexual-social power can create.
One guy literally gets HIVES.
Most 'regular men' don't have the courage to approach super beautiful or super sexy girls, they figure those girls are already so popular, they're out of the men's league. So they try to aim lower, something more human, something more approachable, something less scary, women they could at least have a conversation with.
Of course this leads to wonky situations sometimes, because the men don't realize all other men think the same way. PUAs and Alphas (CEOs, outlaw bikers, celebrities, etc.) pick up the super beautiful ones, and all the regular, average men (that women love to call 'creeps', because women aren't turned on by 'average') flock en massé towards the 'cute neighbour girls', especially those that have a special 'radiation' about them.
Women can't change their hypergamious (hypergamic?) nature any more than men can change their lust for visually attractive, 'cute' or even 'kind/good' women (for the lack of attractive ones - cute + kind would be a jackpot for most men, even if she's not otherwise all that beautiful).
This world would be a better place, if both genders would be sexually turned on by goodness and kindness, instead of looks (men) and hypergamy (women).
There are woman that have a 'radiation' about them.
However, since there are billions of lonely, horny men, whose sexual needs are not met, and since men have higher sex drive than women, and since women have abundance of sex, sexual partners, access to sexual satisfaction on all possible levels and ways, while men struggle to find anything even from the 'paid' side of things, it can get really weird, and the situation is a disaster on this planet.
No matter how kind and good a woman tries to be, the sexual power is always going to be a powerful temptation. These 'cute neighbour girl' types are often the ones with so many potential suitors, in real life and in the internet (and there are so many venues in the internet these days), I wouldn't blame them if they went completely bonkers from all this social-sexual power.
There's no place a 'cute' girl can go (especially the 'radiating' ones), that doesn't have zillions of horny men ready to bonk her if she even hints at that direction.
Honestly, in this kind of a world, in this kind of a situation, a woman has to have a _SERIOUS_ deformation or level of ugliness/obesity/old age to be in as poor a situation sexually (and socially/romantically) as a good, hardworking, average man is.
You can find the most grotesque women in camgirl sites and porn videos - men are actually paying pretty close to actual MONSTERS for some kind of sexual release.
So, basically, almost literally ALL women are the ones men want, but there are those special 'radiating' girls that do not have to be 'super beautiful' - they can be 'cute in a quirky way that takes awhile to fully see/appreciate', while being a little bit obese, and yet be desired by thousands of men.
Women's problem is that they have too many men lusting for them.
Men's problem is that they have no one to satisfy their lust with.
It's a weird, sad world, when it comes to this stuff, and this movie exemplifies just how crazy it can get (though in an exaggerated way
Movies are a visual medium, of course, so casting is important. They didn't find a 'radiating girl' (they're rare, and hard to find), so they just cast someone 'good-looking' to tell the STORY of there being something about Mary.
We don't experience it as an audience directly from Cameron Diaz, but we can still understand it through the passion and actions of the men that suffer from the infatuation.
We can know it second-hand through the STORY, not directly the visuals or personality of Cameron Diaz herself.
The easiest way to understand what that 'something' is, is to experience it about someone else, and then relate that feeling to what these men must be feeling. We can realize this movie is the story about this kind of thing happening, and the problematic ludicrous extremes that this kind of overly powerful infatuation can lead to.
Of course this is a comedy, so it takes things to a silly goofiness, and it's a hollywood movie, so it has a happy ending (though these stories usually don't have that in real life).
The best thing is to not take it so LITERALLY and DIRECTLY (as if it was about Mary, Cameron Diaz, etc.), but more METAPHORICALLY and as something to RELATE to, when you are experiencing this 'something' about some woman that you suddenly feel something powerful about (even against your own consent).
Also, a good-looking, attractive, sexy, young woman with pretty face and good body doesn't really NEED to be anything other than a 'bore' - these women get enough male attention of all kinds, regardless of how boring they are. Women aren't required to entertain or to be witty, or even to have an interesting personality, like men are. They can get by solely on their looks.
The problem with Cameron Diaz is that in the end, she can't -quite- pull it off - she comes off as an 'ordinary' woman with 'ok looks' instead of super-attractive Cosmic level 'something'. She looks good, but she's not "super beautiful".
Having short man-hair doesn't help..
"No girl worths that much effort
"Especially the one seen the movie. Why go through all that effort?"
That's your logic, rational mind, brain, intellect talking.
When your heart starts talking, it will tell a completely different story. What we have shown certainly doesn't seem to warrant the effort, but if you ever encounter someone that has 'something' about them, you will understand. Without the powerful feeling, it all seems really silly and superficial.
The feeling makes even this kind of silly comedy make almost perfect sense (except for the happy ending), at least as far as 'unexplainable desire for someone that seems so special for reasons your mind can't understand'-effect goes.
It's like love songs do not make sense without some kind of 'emotional content' - even if it means parasocial infatuation or unrequited love. If you just listen to them emotionless, analyse them purely with intellect/mind, they're just boring clichés without nothing interesting about them musically or lyrically.
But when it hits ya, they suddenly make perfect sense and have the power to make you bawl uncontrollably and hysterically for the whole duration.
Even if a man agrees that no one is worth that kind of effort, in a sudden situation like that, the heart feels like if there's even the slightest chance, it will make you do pretty much anything.
The trick is to NOT listen to your heart, no matter how you suffer as a consequence, and just let the emotion pass until you can be rational again. That separates simps from others - a simp doesn't question the heart, but follows it 100%, and then wonders why it didn't work (and wastes effort, money, useless toil, while creating problems for everyone).
..maybe nothing specific about the actress, but more like a symbolic expression of the character; meant to embody the typical 'unrequited love'-situation that can so easily open up a man's chest for emotions he didn't even know can still exist.
Once it hits ya, you can understand the title of the movie. If it has never hit ya, consider yourself lucky, and try to keep it that way.
This kind of 'there's something about her'-phenomenon can ruin lives.
But I am glad they never explained what that 'something' is in the movie, because that's how it is in real life. You never know what 'it' is.
You won't know if you will ever find out. The emotions only 'feel', they won't 'tell'..
..you only know there's 'something' about her.
The brother is no problem, if you treat him well. The dog is not a problem, if you have watched even a couple of episodes of 'Dog Whisperer'.
The 'something' is probably symbolic. This movie is not claiming that Cameron Diaz has any special 'magic' about her; the movie just exists as a metaphor and expression of the ailment that can strike any man like lightning out of the clear blue sky, where you helplessly and uttely fall for some woman you had NO plans even having any kind of relationship with.
It can be a parasocial or real-life, and it can take months or even years to fully recover from. It's something you can't help, emotions can take control so easily even if they have lied dormant for a decade.
I think this is how simps are created; the simp doesn't understand that it's just 'emotional lust' or 'hormonal reaction' or even if it is something deeper and stretches beyond one incarnation, it's still crazy and emotional, and the problem is not that you can't have the woman; the problem is that your emotions want that woman.
This movie presents the typical hollywood solution to any emotional dilemma; the unrealistically 'happy ending' with an unattainable woman (in real life, a young woman like that would have about 10000 suitors, 200 simp 'providers', 50 'friends with benefits', 10 'animalistic alphas always ready-to-go', 5 marriage candidates, and a history of numerous, numerous 'partners'. If she decides to do some kind of easy 'camwork', she will probably have also 'too-many-to-count' paying customers.
When a man falls for a woman like that, in real world, it can only end in tears, sorrow, trouble, problems and even in the best-case scenario, a horrible trap.
Sometimes even a 'not-techically-that-attractive-but-slightly-cute' woman can make a man's emotions open up with enough kind interactions and effective-enough presence of some kind.
So that's what they can 'see in Mary'..
Contrast-based focus concentration?
I mean, if you want to emphasize a color, you can make everything else colorless. If you want for people to focus on a performance, you can make everything around it bland, so nothing disturbs that focus.
But at least the PEN is blue!!
It's not very similar at all.
Also, 'All of Me' is not that funny, but 'Liar, Liar' is.
Maybe she did have parental consent for the marriage contract, but pre-nuptial agreement isn't valid even with parental consent?
They did have a lot to think about, and powerfully confusing emotions to mess with their heads, minds and behaviours. I've made similar mistakes in such situations, where so many forces are affecting my decisions, focus and memory.