1. French women carry a rope at the back of their cars
2. You can drag a car with a rope downhill even if the car's breaks do not function
3. French cooks speak English in their kitchen with a heavy French accent
4. When moving into Europe there is no need for a work visa, only a profession
5. Charlotte Le Bon looks exactly like Audrey Tautou
6. Sometimes brakes break for a reason.
7. French women always ride charming old-fashioned bicycles with baskets.
8. Attempting to bribe the customs official with a samosa isn't going to work.
9. It's very easy to pick poisonous mushrooms by accident.
10. If you can't find mushrooms, you can always pick flowers instead.
11. If you leave a young attractive French woman while you head off to Paris, she'll still be single on your return many months later.
12. Badly burning your hands in a fire is no obstacle to beginning your chef's training the next day.
13. Being a mayor in France involves lots of free food.
No tears please, it's a waste of good suffering.share
14. Michelin-Star restaurants and Indian restaurants seem to be interchangable in the minds of French customers, which would be the only explanation for the fierce competition.
15. Michelin-Star restaurants are only supplied by the town's local market and surrounding woods and apparently have no alternatives should one ingredient no longer be available.
16. Michelin-Star restaurants will change menues according to what the sous-chef finds by chance near the river.
16. Michelin-star restaurants chefs are apparently prone to attack other restaurants with Molotov cocktails in their free time.
17. Pictures are apparently sufficient proof that chickens have not been vaccinated.
18. First complain to your father that you should stop travalling around, only to complain 10 minutes later when he announces that he'd like to settle down.
19. It's apparently sufficient to put on traditional Indian clothes and a Turban to fill your empty restaurant to the brim.
20. If point 19. doesn't work immediatly, it's okay to force/trick the first clients into coming.
21. Be sure to act offended and surprised if the person you've given French cook books actually starts to cook French meals.
22. After you've been accepted into a Michelin-Star restaurant because you cooked an omelette with Indian spices in the first place, be sure to use this technique only after certain amount of time.
23. When you accept to start your training in the Restaurant literally across the street, you appararently are no longer allowed to sleep in your home.
24. Michelin-star restaurants in Paris look like chemistry labs or "Master Chef" sets and only serve dishes in the moleculaire style.
25. Sea urchins are apparently a serious no-go for this type of cuisine.
26. Indian spices seem to be even rarer in Europe than in the Middle ages; one suitcase has to last you a long time. Importing these comes a a surprise to our main hero.
27. Apparently dramatic changed looks imply merely to grow a beard for our main hero.
27. CGI-fireworks seem to be a big thing in France.
28. If your friend burns his hands seriously, be sure to ask the sensible and casual question if the hands in fact do hurt.
LOL these were spot on!
- "is this the secret headquarters of the gestapo?"
- "It was"
First of all I want to preface this by saying I loved this film, even though most of it was pretty predictable.. but hey, it's a Hollywood film.... so I'm not having a dig at it but wanted to play along with this silly game. :)
29. If you're a young, single woman (French or otherwise) you would actually choose to live in the middle of nowhere in a town of population of what seems to be about 200 (given that women are more social, if they are young and single, French women rarely live alone and if they do it's going to be in a city of a sizeable population).
30. If you're a young, single French woman who sees an Indian family on the side of the road you'd stop for them (I have lived in France and still live in Europe and this is highly unlikely. Strangers don't just approach you like they do in Anglo/other countries).
* 31. People drive cars and wear clothes from 50s or 60s, and use rotary phones, even though the film is set in modern day times (prices at the market are in euros) * Why is this?
32. An Indian person knows all about mushrooms which grow in French forests
33. If you get a new job in Paris, it's sure to be in a place with floor to ceiling glass windows and a perfect view of the Eiffel Tower.
34. (as with all films): When something nice or romantic happens, it's always sunny (and sunset/dusk time), if something bad or sad happens, it'll be raining
35. Indian people eat sea urchins in India
36. If you're a child or teenager, you don't need to go to school. Working in a restaurant is sufficient enough education.
37. If you're a child or teenager, you don't need any friends or peers or potential love interests
38. You will definitely fall in love if there is someone who happens to be close to you in age, and who happens to be single and living nearby
39. French people call Bastille Day Bastille Day (they don't)
40. It seems to be Bastille Day more than once a year
41. It's OK to choose an English woman to play one of the lead roles as a French woman, because clearly there aren't enough French actresses...
42. As with many other films, if you hate someone at the beginning, you end up liking them a lot (and becoming best friends or romantic partners) by the end of the film
43. That it's easy to become a top Michelin star chef
44. That it's easy to get by in a tiny French village by speaking only English
45. A young, single girl feels perfectly safe riding through a forest after dark to get home
46. Taking dancing lessons and picking flowers with Helen Mirren is almost like having a girlfriend. Almost.
47. Unsolicited samosa and pigeons with truffles will be refused.
48. Molecular chefs get on the news, but also mope around their restaurants after closing time.
49. La Baleine Grise restaurant in Paris believes in three words: Innovation, Innovation, Innovation.
50. Busy immigration officials in Holland will patiently listen to you recount your whole life story.
51. If there is fire, make sure to walk right into it
52. If you catch on fire, whatever you do, DON'T stop, drop & roll
53. If your hands burn for 20-30 seconds, no problem, you can ride a bike the next day and you will heal in a week
54. Hot girls with great bodies like men who look like terrorists and smell of curry
55. Sending spices from India are cheaper than a flight ticket
56. A 2 Michelin star kitchen can also used for a quickie
57. French girls, who are sous chefs, always want their loaned books returned; "when you no longer need them"
58. Children should not interfere when their dads are bargaining a salary
59. Because a 200 year old recipe is long enough
60. A suitable alternative to pigeon and truffle sauce dish is chicken
Ari Vederci
=0)
61. If you are working in a fancy Paris restaurant, it is totally normal stay after hours and eat the dish your wife prepared for you, instead of, you know, actually going home.
62. It is very unexpected for a innovative, molecular restaurant to use cardamom, or any other spices from India, which is a tiny unheard town on Mars.
63. Indian men are like catnip to French women in food industry.
64. If you feed Beef Bourguignon to children, they will spit it out and be dramatic little *beep* about it.
65. The sellers in French markets will keep the items they already sold on display, because it is more fun that way.
66. It makes total sense for you to move across to road when you start a job there. It also makes perfect sense that French chick who has been working there for ages, to live elsewhere, above some grumpy French neighbour.
67. Most sea urchin sellers in crowded India bazaars actually have time to observe how children are reacting to their products.