I think this movie is brilliant. (bit of a review)

I just finished watching Nymphomaniac.... I'd read this. It contains important movie thoughts.

First of all, I have no idea what is with movie critics and this movie. Or the general public. It's as if they wanted to see a movie that this movie was not. Nymphomaniac either disgusts it's critic, bores them, or the critic likes it but refuses to give it a perfect score, as if they were well prepared to pick a fight with the movie knowing exactly what they would see. All-in-all, I've only found one great review of the film from a proud feminist who actually cared to look beyond the sex in the movie. And that's where my review will begin.

Nymphomaniac really isn't about sex at all, but of nature and the human being in conflict with what isn't natural: society. But Nymphomaniac is not the first movie to take on the subject of nymphomania. The film is most comparable to a 2009 movie, Diary of a Nymphomaniac, which is also a woman's life story of her difficulties balancing sex with a normal life. But where 'Diary' is the Lifetime movie equivalent of the subject of nymphomania, where the movie ends with the moral: it's your life, do what you want with it, and love yourself for it (Not exactly philosophical, especially when the whole of the movie doesn't feel real at all) Nymphomaniac tries to stay away from that simple a lesson.

Nymphomaniac is different in 3 ways: 1.) the director's cut is 5 1/2 hours long, compared to 'Diary's 100 minutes. 2.) we're left with much more challenging thoughts, with a very different epiphany for the ending. And 3.) 'Diary' begins with a montage of intercourse, then conflict, then continues through other erotic situations to establish the character's satisfaction and to add a little more conflict before the resolution. Nymphomaniac is actually quite the opposite. The movie is notoriously graphic, but we don't see that graphic imagery until 30 minutes in. And we're not lead towards a climactic payoff; we're actually lead down a road of pain and depression, where the sex gets less erotic, and spread out, leaving us with a climax that is about the story and not the sex. This reminds me of another exploitation movie, Irreversible, where instead of going through character conversations to be rewarded with a violent end, we're shown the more gut-turning material FIRST, and then we analyze what lead to the occurrence. Hence: Nymphomaniac isn't about sex or to stimulate eroticism; it's an epic story about what happens from the result of the character's sexual activities. This is the most overlook aspect from critics: that there's a real story going on and the movie isn't meant to be erotic. If anything, it's not about the feeling of sex, but the physicality and philosophy behind it, and what I mean by that is that the movie shows some very un-erotic sex and physical injuries as a result. But most importantly: no scene is unnecessary, I assure you. What we see and how graphic it is has a reason. And that reason is we're supposed to see the movie with the mind of the character, Seligman.

The movie is about Joe (the force of bodily pleasure) telling her life story to Seligman (the force of intellectual pleasure). Seligman is of liberal mind where Joe is surprisingly conservative. And with these two we are presented with the whole of human history, battling with eachother: Joe trying to shock Seligman, to convince him she is immoral, and Seligman with a rebuttal in comforting her, with examples of music, philosophy, science, and fly fishing, that she is no less a bad human being than the repressed society. It's actually a very comforting movie to those who wonder if they are ever good enough. That's what Joe feels, and she rewards Seligman's act of kindness with a battle of wits and with more knowledge for him to collect. But the brilliance in this movie is that we're being told 2 stories: Joe's past and her conversation with Seligman. 2 stories we're anxiously waiting to get to. We want to know where Joe's life goes, and then we want to know Seligman's responses, which are always fascinating and informative. Whether the director, Lars Von Trier had all this knowledge in his head or had to research it for the story I don't know, but what we're given in Nymphomaniac is INCREDIBLE dialogue and facts. And what's best is that it's not dialogue that is spluttered out. There's 2 kinds of dialogue: the dialogue that establishes character personality and naturalism, and the dialogue that reflects the story. This movie is all about using dialogue and images to build how we should reflect on the story, and it's wonderful just knowing when you're watching Nymphomaniac that you're getting something no other movie will give you.

Nymphomaniac leaves you enthusiastic about what comes next. You really do beg for more. Not just for the story, but you get wonderful characters and moments as well. Charlotte Gainsbourg is a fantastic actress. She's been in 3 Von Trier movies and her presence in each feels so different. And that's just great. Stellan Skarsgard also stands out like never before. Christian Slater is the best he's been in years, and Uma Thurman is a scene-stealer. Her short part in the movie is the best, only because it feels to authentic. And despite the bad criticism, of which critics seem to be ready to say before they watch the movie, Shia LaBeouf is perfectly fine. Actually, he fits the character very well: a bit of a wiener, a bit of a phony, a bit of a jerk, yet with that slight appealing charisma that we can understand why Joe is attracted to him yet doesn't want to be.

Nymphomaniac is a lot of things. Critics are harsh about this movie saying it is inauthentic and phony about women's sexuality. But the movie isn't about women's sexuality, it's about Joe's sexuality, and Von Trier can build a character to be anything he wants. But this is LEAST OF ALL a representation of the sexual emotions of women as a whole; of a luxury society who we can agree to define what love and lust and sex "must" feel like. This movie is about the idea of a rebellion against love, and with the most important lession, "Human qualities can be expressed in one word: Hypocrisy." The movie is also an expression of cinema and uses many techniques and references, and it feels like a direction where movies should go by drawing from visuals of cinema's past. I personally love how Von Trier can take you out of the movie and remind you you're not watching life, you're watching something organized and edited for expression. And this is a personal movie of Von Trier's: his own cinematic identity, making references to his previous films, and references to his own life, feelings, and a certain controversy one day at the Cannes Film Festival. What you get is an unbelievably well thought out film and nothing that you would expect. I didn't expect what I eventually saw, and I've been following updates and reviews on this movie like gangbusters.

Nymphomaniac will surprise you in many ways. For some it may shock to see the images of penetration and deep focus on genitals, but it does have a purpose to stimulate feelings, the last of which is supposed to be eroticism. Nymphomaniac is NOT that kind of movie. It is a very serious movie. All I suggest is 1.) Watch the director's cut. I can't imagine what was cut in the shorter version because it all feels so necessary. And this really is the kind of movie you want the absolute most of. 2.) Unlike Kill Bill where I feel I can watch Vol. 1 one day and watch Vol. 2 another, don't do that with Nymphomaniac. Find a lazy day where you can spare 5 1/2 hours. Vol. 2 of Nymphomaniac starts immediately and at a low, sadder pace that feels far more appropriate and is much more effective if you watch it right after Vol. 1 that starts at a pretty entertaining high. Nymphomaniac was meant to be seen as 1 entire movie, and edited to feel that way, so watch it that way.

It really is a rewarding film, completely underrated, and I couldn't be happier with buying it after a little moment of doubt I did have because of the unreliable and lazy reviews I've read. Keep and open and attentive mind watching it and you'll be rewarded.