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The uncle's friend and some other observations

posted 8 years ago by wtbgc311
8 replies | jump to latest

Did anyone else worry the first time seeing the movie that the uncle's friend might be in on the abuse? I don't think he knew anything about it, but when I first watched the movie, I was afraid the uncle was going to pass Mackenzie off to his friend. I just didn't know how dark it would go. Mackenzie clearly didn't feel like she could go to the guy for help, in any case, even though he looked concerned when he saw her running off.

Another thing: how awful was it that the mother disappeared without leaving a way for Mackenzie to contact her! What was the girl supposed to do in case of an emergency? We don't know the extent of the mother's problems, but it makes me wonder how Mackenzie is going to track her down once she reaches Seattle, and what condition she'll be in when found.

And I thought it was kind of funny when the kite lady asks Bart if Mackenzie is his daughter, and he quickly says, "Niece." Mackenzie makes a face. Either she's put out that he won't pretend to be her dad, or she's reminded of her real uncle.

[–] Stovepipe99 8 years ago

I don't have much to add to your thoughts. It did also occur to me at first that the uncle's friend might be in on the abuse. But on the other hand, the uncle did seem to be very conflicted and guilty about what he was doing to her, so maybe he wouldn't want to share that side of himself with anyone.

I think that it was partly to show that McKenzie didn't really have anyone to confide in. It's just not realistic that a 14 year old girl would ask some random dude in his 30s/40s for that kind of help. She really was isolated and the only people she interacted with were the associates of her uncle.

[–] Tin Man-5 8 years ago

Looked to me like he was a working/drinking buddy who was completely clueless to me. Seemed like a nice guy. Molesting anyone, let alone your niece, isn't exactly something you're going to openly broadcast.

[–] Stovepipe99 8 years ago

Molesting anyone, let alone your niece, isn't exactly something you're going to openly broadcast.

It's not something you'd broadcast to a normal person.

Unfortunately, sometimes pervs of a feather fly together. In my area there have been plenty of cases of sexual predators "sharing" their victims (who are children/relatives) with others. One family here even "sold" their 17 year old daughter to a man in his 50s in order to settle a debt.

Even if the guy is totally innocent, it kind of steps up why McKenzie is so miserable. Speaking as a woman (though the same is probably true of younger men), when you are around men you do not know, you kind of depend on the people you do know to help enforce boundaries. In other words, say I were hanging out with my brother and some of his friends. I would partly be depending on my brother to step in if any of his friends got out of line with me.

But for McKenzie, her own uncle has victimized her. So how can she depend on him to protect her? Even though nothing happened, I got SO nervous when they all went into the woods together. It just gave me a horrible sinking feeling.

[–] Tin Man-5 8 years ago

Absolutely fair. As a man, I defer to your perspective.

As an Alaskan who lives in Juneau, I guess I didn't suspect him because, well... we all know that guy. The laid back friend who always comes over for beer. We all have one. So I didn't even give him a second thought.

This is a good conversation, actually, about an important issue.

[–] Stovepipe99 8 years ago

I think that it's a dynamic that extends beyond even man/woman experiences. Like, imagine that you went to visit a friend in a foreign country where you did not speak the language but your friend did. You would be vulnerable in that situation and dependent on your friend to protect you from harm--not necessarily physically, but just generally.

So imagine you're in this foreign country, don't speak a word of the language, and your friend does something to betray that trust. He/she allows you to think that you're ordering/drinking a non-alcoholic drink and you get dangerously drunk. Or he/she takes your debit card without permission and withdraws a huge amount of your money.

You'd probably have a horrible, stuck, helpless feeling. There would be things that in theory could help you (just as McKenzie could theoretically call the police), but if you had any reason to think that reaching out for help could make your situation worse, you'd probably be frightened and feel trapped.

McKenzie is basically that foreign traveler, and her uncle is like the gatekeeper. He controls who she sees and where she goes. He shows that he is capable of hurting her, of acting against her best interests.

I was glad that the friend didn't also abuse McKenzie (and I honestly didn't get that vibe from the way the actor played him), but I can imagine that McKenzie might have been very afraid of what would happen. And just because he didn't abuse her yet doesn't mean it wasn't going to happen. When children can't trust their adults--the people who are their first line of defense--it adds an element of uncertainty and anxiety to everything. Even stuff that is harmless.

[–] Tin Man-5 8 years ago

I think it ultimately can only be judged by what we see on the screen, which is:

1. There is no evidence that he was in on it by what the movie presented; at the same time, there is nothing to show the contrary, so it's open to interpretation.

2. If he's innocent and clueless, it makes the uncle's crimes more despicable because she didn't feel safe in the company of a good man. And he put her in that position.

[–] Stovepipe99 8 years ago

Agreed.

No matter what, she's in a crappy situation--whether he's a threat or not.

[–] wtbgc311 8 years ago

Thanks to you both for replying. I'm glad it turned into a good discussion. I agreed with a lot of your points. The friend turned out to be an innocent guy unaware of the uncle's actions. I suppose the parts that made me wonder were when the uncle introduced him to McKenzie at the office, and later when the friend was involved in the cell phone gift. The cell phone in particular I thought of as the uncle's "grooming" McKenzie in a way, making her feel indebted to him, maybe.