MovieChat Forums > The New Normal (2012) Discussion > Shocked by this week's episode

Shocked by this week's episode


I'll say right up front that I love this show.

That said, I was stunned when Gary said he meets only losers, then they cut to a scene of a date revealing to Gary that he discovered when he was six that he was intersexed. What??? Soooooooo many things they could have done with the loser concept and they go with taking a swipe at intersexed folk? I was dumbfounded, disgusted, and disappointed.

BTW, I refer to Gary's date as "he" above because it appeared that the date identified primarily as male.

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Seriously? that shocked you? Are you intersex and that is why you are offended?

I don't know anyone who is intersex but i know plenty of drag queens, transsexuals, transgendered and i do know that scene was funny.

TRUE BLOOD*DEXTER*NURSE JACKIE*TWIN PEAKS*COUGARTOWN*WALKING DEAD*BREAKING BAD*HAPPY ENDINGS*

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One need not be intersex to be offended by the suggestion that they are losers.

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Humor should be open to everyone and everything. So you wouldn't be offended if they did the joke, but a nerd was sitting there, or a Jersey Shore type of guy, or a Goth guy? All considered losers at one time or another.

It was just a joke. Lighten up.

TRUE BLOOD*DEXTER*NURSE JACKIE*TWIN PEAKS*COUGARTOWN*WALKING DEAD*BREAKING BAD*HAPPY ENDINGS*

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Not a valid comparison. The implication was that a simple birth trait renders a person a loser.

What if Gary said he only meets losers and they followed that with a dialogless shot of a black or Asian guy, or a redhead?

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I understand exactly how you feel, LightningBalt. It's always hurtful when a show we particularly enjoy makes a snarky jab like that, -like having a favourite dog snap at you as you try to pet it. I love several sitcoms, but I'm always dodging those deadly snubs. I have several traits that, in the Gospel according the Judd Apatow, brand me as a loser. I've been in a Bach choir, I play the harpsichord, and I prefer bicycles to skateboards. As Rocky would put it, if I were any more lame my surname would be Cratchit. Oh, snap.

New Normal is surprisingly delinquent in this respect. Like the "lesbians with gingerbread men bodies" remark, -something you really wouldn't expect in a show co-written by Ali Adler. Don't let it get to you. When I was just 12 I watched a friend starve herself almost to death because she'd been exposed to a zillion implacable media blows warning her that chubby = does not deserve to live. At one point she was afraid even to drink water, fearing 'bloat'. Pam is far from the only one, yet they've learned nothing in the twenty years since. Gary's niece?? Don't let the bastards wear you down, LB.

Reading empowering books like Jean Kilbourne's Can't Buy My Love: How Advertising Changes the Way We Think and Feel really helps in decoding the nefarious subtext.

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"Reading empowering books like Jean Kilbourne's Can't Buy My Love: How Advertising Changes the Way We Think and Feel really helps in decoding the nefarious subtext. "

This sounds like a really interesting book. Can you share a little more about it and after you read it, what you personally got from it. Thanks.

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- taopolis on Mon Jan 14 2013 15:02:52
"Reading empowering books like Jean Kilbourne's Can't Buy My Love: How Advertising Changes the Way We Think and Feel really helps in decoding the nefarious subtext. "

This sounds like a really interesting book. Can you share a little more about it and after you read it, what you personally got from it. Thanks.


Sorry it took two days to get back to you, taopolis, but I'm taking organic chemistry so I'm completely distracted! It's a fantastic book, and I hope you'll get a chance to read it for yourself. In the meantime, I've copy-pasted the following from JK's website. (And no, I am not connected to her; but I'm notorious for recommending books online!! )


Touchstone + November 2000 + 368 Pages + ISBN: 0-684-86600-5 + $14.00 paperback

Can’t Buy My Love is the paperback edition of Deadly Persuasion: Why Women and Girls Must Fight the Addictive Power of Advertising, published in hardback in 1999.

Visit independent book seller IndieBound to buy.

Book Jacket

“When was the last time you felt this comfortable in a relationship?” — An ad for sneakers

“You can love it without getting your heart broken.” — An ad for a car

“Until I find a real man, I’ll settle for a real smoke.” — A woman in a cigarette ad

Many advertisements these days make us feel as if we have an intimate, even passionate relationship with a product. But as Jean Kilbourne points out in this fascinating and shocking exposé, the dreamlike promise of advertising always leaves us hungry for more. We can never be satisfied, because the products we love cannot love us back.

Drawing upon her knowledge of psychology, media, and women’s issues, Kilbourne offers nothing less than a new understanding of a ubiquitous phenomenon in our culture. The average American is exposed to over 3,000 advertisements a day and watches three years’ worth of television ads over the course of a lifetime. Kilbourne paints a gripping portrait of how this barrage of advertising drastically affects young people, especially girls, by offering false promises of rebellion, connection, and control. She also offers a surprising analysis of the way advertising creates and then feeds an addictive mentality that often continues throughout adulthood.

Table of Contents
Foreword by Mary Pipher
Introduction: “A Girl of Many Parts”
The Making of an Activist

“Buy this 24-year-old and get all his friends absolutely free”
 — We Are the Product
“In Your Face … All over the Place!” 
– Advertising Is Our Environment
“Bath Tissue is Like Marriage”
 — The Corruption of Relationships
“Can an Engine Pump the Valves in Your Heart?”
– Crazy for Cars
“Please, Please, You’re Driving Me Wild”
 — Falling in Love with Food
“The More You Subtract, the More You Add” — 
Cutting Girls Down to Size
“Forget the Rules! Enjoy the Wine” — Alcohol and Rebellion
“What You’re Looking For”
 — Rage and Rebellion in Cigarette Advertising
“The Dream Begins as Soon as You Open the Door”
 — Advertising an Addictive Mind-Set
“In Life There Are Many Loves, But Only One Grande Passion” — 
Addiction as a Relationship
“You Talkin’ to Me?”
 — Advertising and Disconnection
“Two Ways a Woman Can Get Hurt”
 — Advertising and Violence
“Relax. And Enjoy the Revolution” — 
Redefining Rebellion
Notes
Bibliography
Acknowledgments
Index

Reviews

“Backlash meets The Beauty Myth … a scathing attack on the powers that tell us
what, how much,when and why to buy.” –SELF magazine

“A profound work that is required reading for informed consumers.” –Publishers Weekly

“Jean Kilbourne’s work is profoundly important, and like many others I know I eagerly await her new book. She’s one of those people who makes a difference in how we see the world.” –Arlie Hochschild author of The Time Bind; Director, Center for Working Families, University of California, Berkeley

From Kirkus Reviews

A powerful, sobering call to arms by the documentarian (Killing Us Softly, Slim Hopes, Pack of Lies), lecturer, and scholar. Jean Kilbourne has an axe to grind, as she is refreshingly honest about admitting right up front. She is appalled by the power that various industries exert over the media, and has spent the past 30 years researching the pervasive and insidious nature of advertising in society. Here she examines the influence that advertising has on consumers, focusing particularly on how it contributes to the problems that girls and women already face in terms of economics, violence, and physical and emotional health. Kilbourne does not naively attribute any of the problems that women face directly to advertising; indeed she frequently states that no one particular advertisement or campaign can be blamed for anything. But her incisive interpretation of research and statistics points out with precision the advantage advertising companies take of the public’s tendencies toward addiction, and, even more importantly, the ways corporations use their economic hold over the media to withhold information from their customers. Kilbourne is specific and often humorous as she displays and deconstructs various ad campaigns and their methods of co-opting the human desire for connection; referring to a BMW ad that claims, “If you do shiver, it’ll be from excitement,” she asks, “Are we supposed literally to be turned on by the experience of driving these cars (or simply being inside them)? Is it progress that both men and women can now experience the thrill of having sex with their cars? Will people go parking by themselves before long?” One of the most egregious results of the ever-present sales pitch, explains Kilbourne, is the fact that those who buy whatever is being sold are often trying to fill an internal emptiness and inevitably failing. A broad and provocative look at the ads that bombard us, and what they do to our culture. (100 b&w illus.) (Radio satellite tour) — Copyright ©1999, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved.

From Library Journal

Kilbourne is mad as hell and is not going to take it anymore. In this all-out assault on the advertising industry, she expands on the landmark studies of Wilson Key to accuse advertisers of deliberately creating an atmosphere that encourages addictive behavior. Through an adolescent world view emphasizing narcissism, immediate gratification, and rebellion, they target the most vulnerable, and highly desirable, marketing demographic–young women aged 15 to 30. In graphic examples, Kilbourne, a visiting scholar at Wellesley College and a popular national lecturer, illustrates the ways they concoct a virtual reality in which addictive behavior, especially that connected with alcohol, tobacco, sex, and food, is presented not only as normal but also as the solution to any problem. Women whose self-image is shaped by ads depicting them as childlike and ineffectual are particularly susceptible to the premise that the purchase and use of certain products will make their social, emotional, and financial difficulties disappear. In this regard, the chapters on alcohol and sexual violence are both powerful and persuasive. Although strident at times, this is an important work. Highly recommended for public and academic libraries. — Rose M. Cichy, Osterhout Free Lib., Wilkes-Barre, PA Copyright ©1999, Cahners Business Information.

From Publisher’s Weekly

No longer confined to 30-second TV spots and newspaper and magazine columns, advertisements now find their way into movie plots (as product placements) and high school lessons, onto municipal buses, sports scoreboards, clothing and even food. Kilbourne, best known for her documentary film work (Killing Us Softly; Pack of Lies), has extended her anti-advertising crusade into print in a profound work that is required reading for informed consumers. She adeptly illustrates that advertising encourages buyers to lavish affection on products rather than on other people, and pitches these trivialized relationships most fervently to girls and women. Worse, according to the author, addictive products are touted as outlets of expression and rebellion and are advertised to an increasingly younger demographic. She writes, “Advertising doesn’t cause addictions. But… [it] contributes mightily to the climate of denial in which relationships flounder and addictions flourish.” Drawing on a combination of psychology, feminist critique and media studies, Kilbourne cites numerous ads that downplay romantic commitment or healthy self-esteem in order to sell these qualities through products like backpacks or diet pills. She exposes the way advertisers take advantage of women’s and girls’ stifled feelings of rage and loss of control, and cause gender stereotypes to flourish. Likely to spark intense controversy, Kilbourne’s passionate treatise is a wake-up call about the damaging effects of advertising in our media-saturated culture. Copyright ©1999, Cahners Business Information.


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FYI--Judd Apatow produced a FANTASTIC, little known series called "FREAKS & GEEKS."

One episode deals with an intersex character is a BRILLIANT way.

By the Amy that series is now available on Netflix, and it's positively genius. I recommend it to everyone, and in return I've only gotten "wow how did I not know about this show!?!?"

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Then the loser he met at that time happened to be black, asian, or a redhead. What if it was a white guy?

Are all white people losers now?

Don't read into it that much. No mater who they showed there, someone is bound to be offended because they have something in common with them.

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I agree with the OP...to a point.

Intersex is a topic which so few know about, and most are truly shocked (I WAS!) when they learn how frequently it naturally occurs.

This show says LOTS of things that are sarcastically offensive to get a laugh--practically every line from Arkin's "Nana" is that way.

But I don't think the writers intended to portray intersex-born people as "losers."

The only persons this show has painted as losers are bigoted, intolerant types.

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I've been enjoying how Jane's been slowly maturing/evolving into a better person.

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I agree. It was a revolting scene. I'm surprised GLAAD wasn't all over that.

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It is comedy show . Lighten up.It is just showing mentality of Gary who thinks that intersex people are loser.It doesn't preach a social commentary through Gary's character "that intersex people are loser".

Take for example Nana.She says lots of things against gays, blacks and jews.That doesn't mean writers are propagating negative views about these groups through Nana character.
They are just showing what kind of person Nana is .


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True, but we expect that from Nana.

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I also agree with you that Nana is mean and we can expect that from her while Gary is comparatively nicer guy.
But I think you must have met many nice people who have their own set of prejudice against an individual or any group .I think even I also may have some prejudice (May be people close to me can point it out).

May be Gary represent those people.
Having said that I also admit in real life nice guys like Gary needs to have broadminded view about intersex people.


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Can someone explain the term "intersex" to me?

Children know that magic
makes the world go 'round.

Qqumba Zoo

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An intersex person is born with both male and female genitalia. A small percentage of the population is born that way.

I too felt that the crack about intersex people being losers was shocking, and ridiculously inappropriate for a show featuring gay characters. Gays as a group have been marginalized (and even outlawed) for much of their existence. So for a show that should have much of awareness of marginalized sexual minorities such as themselves, it's inexcusable for them to have slipped that "joke" in there. Love the show, but this was a low point, for sure.

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Thanks for answering my question.

I admit to missing the joke, but agree that it is one told in poor taste. Too bad they have to resort to such humor.

Children know that magic
makes the world go 'round.

Qqumba Zoo

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Okay...let me ask you, as one who was offended, this question,

Did you feel like the show, by the intent of the writers, painted all intersex-born people as losers?

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I was aware of the genetic possibility of this human outcome for quite some time.

However until I did some light research after seeing a documentary that included a real intersex character, I WASN'T aware how surprisingly FREQUENTLY this occurs in nature and how experienced some doctors were at "corrective" surgery that yielded a clear sexual assignment.

In fact, some persons born intersex were never aware that they were born that way until much later in life.

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Some people need to get a grip! People are too easily offended these days! It's a bloody COMEDY show! The shows producers/writers obviously weren't being nasty towards intersex people!

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