MovieChat Forums > Jodaeiye Nader az Simin (2011) Discussion > What decision did the daughter make?

What decision did the daughter make?


Very interesting movie. I loved the care taken to show how gender plays a part in modern Iranian culture and how young Iranian women are forced to make decisions about how they choose to live their lives.

The father Nader was the most interesting character to me; he was between a rock and a hard place in virtually every area of his life. He felt compelled to stay and take care of his ailing father (maintaining tradition and valuing patriarchal values over everything else), he wanted to make a good stable home for his daughter (giving her a basis of security and hope for the future), and he wanted to get along with his wife (but she seemed totally unwilling to compromise in any way). He tried to do the right thing in every area of his life, following his traditional values, but like any human, he floundered and made mistakes along the way.

His intentions were good, but at the core, did he do good? And was he a good father to his daughter? Did he live as the sort of example she needed in life?

The one time I felt Nader took a very wrong step was near the end when he put all the responsibility of whether he went to prison onto his daughter. She knew him to have lied about a very important point in his case and he knew that he had disappointed her and betrayed her trust in him as a moral, upstanding man. But then he said (and I paraphrase), "If you want me to tell them the truth, I will," knowing full well if he did, he would go to prison.

A father shouldn't put all that responsibility on a child; the decision about the fate of his life, not to mention everyone else's lives, should be his own decision and no one else's. He was responsible for the reality he had created; his daughter was not. Giving her all that power effectively put so much responsibility onto her that she would carry guilt with her for the rest of her life, no matter what her decision.

At the end, like probably everyone, as Nader and his wife waited in the waiting room of the court, I considered everything, and wondered which parent the daughter decided to go with. She didn't seem to even like her mother, and obviously preferred her father as a person, and she loved her grandfather. But the daughter never considered anything lightly, and I know her "likes" and "dislikes" wouldn't have entered into her decision. Which parent would have given her the best life? A mother who runs away from everything and denies her past when the going gets tough? Or a father who cannot give up his past because it gives him comfort to stay there?

I suppose the end of the film raisesd the question: how should the next generation of young Iranian women behave, living in a patriarchal culture which gives men most of the power in life but puts the moral onus onto the women?




Man will never be free until the last king is strangled by the last priest

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> was he a good father to his daughter?

Certainly a better parent than the mother, leaving everyone behind and pretty much causing this whole mess as a trick for them to go abroad, having intentions of coming back to live with them. Good parent and humans in general deal with their issues by talking, not by fleeing, lying and manipulating anyone, much less the people they love, much less their own family.

> He was responsible for the reality he had created

Was he? You give a very light answer to a central question of the film. Was he responsible for her wife leaving? For his father getting old? For the miscarriage and subsequently the other father harassment in school? If you think any of those are obvious you should watch the movie again for it gives no easy answers.

Also, he did to his daughter what reasonable people do when they make a mistake. You try to make it right. If he was wrong he lied he asks her: should I go tell the judge that now and spend 2 years in prison? Of course she doesn't want him to! What can he do now, go back and change the past? Everyone errs but no one thinks he should pay for this mistake by going to jail as a murderer and leaving grandfather alone to die.

> which parent the daughter decided to go with

If I would answer to your questions I would say the father, he is the best choice for her. But she cries so much and asks to be alone with the judge and that seems to me like she is ashamed of her own decision. Just like her mom she will make a stupid choice and hurt the person that loves her most. It is her only mistake in the movie (except for lying to the judge before) but she is young and being a girl it makes sense that she would do something stupid just like her mom acts in a stress situation.

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I dislike movies that leave us hanging.

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It wouldn't have mattered who the daughter chose because there was no solution to their problems.

For that reason, it was the perfect ending imo.

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She chose the mother. There's a cinematic, visual hint when her parents go outside and a woman with a young girl passes right by them. This movie is very visual, a lot of things are shown through these little clues. Pay attention to windows and broken glass, for example, a lot of social commentary there. The ending scene is so powerful and perfectly sums up the movie and what the director thinks about the 'separation' of men and women in iranian culture, yet not a word is spoken, only noise, it just awes me.

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The father shoved a pregnant woman near the top of the stairs. He lies to himself, he could have paid the other coupe the money without admitting responsibility (and the angry man would not have done any serious harm to his daughter), he could have stuck with the plan to leave Iran without meaning his dad was completely abandoned.

The mother was the only person who was willing to sacrifice everything for their daughter. She is willing to come back if the father will stop putting his pride first (which he can't see).

I'm just offering counter arguments to the posts above. Everyone in this film is both innocent and part responsible, it is near impossible to objectively choose which parent is most right.

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