They had a conversation on the bed before the kiss and she admits her first kiss was at age eleven with "Robert". Then she says, "He was my dad's boss." Charlie barely reacts and she just told him she was molested.
shareYes! She was.
"Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people."
i also found it a bit weird, how neither of them really reacts to it.
perhaps he was too into getting kissed soon
I mean, it didn't turn into a therapy session but I remember him looking a bit taken aback and saddened.
shareIt would be totally over-the-top Hollywood and Shakespearean to react more than what you saw. In fact, it was quite realistic how Charlie and Sam portrayed the scene.
And when a person flinches, like 'in his mind', some might not jump up, throw around the furniture, open a window and yell from the top of his lungs: "woe, woe, a rape doth happened yesteryear and beyond!, my heart cries out fro thee!, my heart is broken!!, my kingdom for a horse" Some people would just sit there, listen, look you in the eye and let you talk for a while.
From personal experience, the best talks I've had about trauma, would be with people who would just stay. Stay, look me in the eye, nod, ask a few questions, maybe even shed a tear.
A person who is in control (not saying Charlie was in control all the time) of his emotions in a certain moment, would NOT jump up, destroy some furniture, yell stuff from the top of their lungs and break down themselves and start sobbing uncontrollably.
So, just sitting, listening is the best sign of connection. I've had talks about bullying myself and how, being a victim, it ruined me as a person. I have a "dysthymic disorder" to cope with, probably for the rest of my life. I cannot accept love and do not believe people who say they love me - to some degree, that is. (If you would like to know how it is, just watch or remember the guy Sutter from 'The Spectacular Now', minus the booze). Some people would, if we talked, make the conversation about them and their feelings about what happened to me. And not in a way that they're truly concerned, it's more like they hijacked my problem, made it their own and started feeling sorry for themselves. They might even tell my story to a third party and ball their eyes out.
What Charlie does is terrific: Sam has pain from her younger years, she shares, she cries, she shares some more, she is completely open about her doubts and self-esteem issues - Charlie looks at her, he lets her talk, he says some kind words, he lets her problem be her problem (in the sense that he doesn't hijack, and gives her the full right and opportunity to feel whatever she feels) and is just there for her and makes her feel safe and loved. That's also what eventually wins her over as his girlfriend.
Hey, I'll be a part of this world.share
Yes, and both their reactions looked very realistic for teenagers who have learned to live hiding their problems, and who care for each other.
share