gender swaps, race swaps, and Bruce's attitude toward Alfred

I don't mind the first two if they make sense in the story.

Gender swap for character is fine if it makes sense. The female Penguin is not the Penguin. Period. She was a mean Burgess Meredith in hot pants. Yes, that looks as bad as it sounds.
I actually like the idea of a female crime lord and one so sociopathic that she has no issue with killing her own children. That is not Penguin. Create a new character.

Race swapping the Gordons is fine, but red hair on Barbara? If white folk wearing dreadlocks is cultural appropriation, then I am pretty sure a black person dying their red is too.

Bruce's attitude toward Alfred doesn't make sense. Bruce is so condescending that Lucius calls him out. As a boy Bruce goes to Alfred and asks for his help in revenge, et al. So why 20 years later does Bruce treat him so poorly? Doesn't make sense.

bonus question: why do all the men have shoulders as wide as a 57 Chevy?