What I call a 'Greyhound Bus' Movie

When a movie has notable Hollywood stars, and a script this hideously awful, and hits just about all the formulaic/genre cliches, and looks like a slightly glorified sit-com, it's the kind of thing the driver of a Greyhound bus will toss on the DVD player, and everyone will groan who isn't already asleep or on their damn cellphone.

Anyway, I can hardly think of a more damning insult than to simply say, this is a Greyhound Bus movie, and in this instance, there is no greater (i.e. more awful) recipient of this honor. Well, perhaps "P.S. I Love You." Such films are obviously not "great," but nor are they egregiously bad enough to be remembered as such. They are instantly forgettable, disposable, perfectly mediocre entertainment-product.

To wit: (as others have summed up elsewhere on this board) The story goes absolutely nowhere for much of the time, aimlessly following one after another shallow/non-dimensional "character." Actually, the characters behaved so inconsistently, I felt sorry for the actors who must have realized they were rudderless (and yeah, the pun is intended, Paul Rudd.)

The corporate subplot is a non-starter: no one cares about the mystery, but it is dragged out as though there will be a giant revelation of stunning proportions. I agree with those who also deemed Nicholson's performance disastrous. The weird attempt at masquerading the sound of a corporate world's lingo was embarrassing.

Zero chemistry between the characters/actors, because their lines had completely implausible motivation. Reese's cipher of a character is anyway just a foil, a trophy in one or another man's closet -- she is made to be ignorant, classless, null. At least she's loyal to her gal pals.

As it happens, I caught this pablum on a Delta flight, not a Greyhound bus (same thing). The other forgettable, mawkish, ugly features were Mr. Popper's Penguins and Arthur (Redux, i.e. Acid Reflux). Case closed.