Terrible. Am I alone in this?


I've seen this movie twice, if you can imagine based on this post's title. The second time was very recent. To be more exact, yesterday. Anyway, upon viewing it a second time, I can see why I wasn't all that impressed the first time around. To start with, I don't really care for Jason Segal. More accurately, I am on the border of despising him, from his dotted appearance to his inadequate acting. Adding this to the formula, the whole movie itself was just a catastrophic disappointment, considering how much I like Emily Blunt. Despite my intense dislike for Jason Segal, I do adore Emily Blunt and her adorably British personality.

The key issue in the film was the dreadful pacing. A romantic comedy, first of all, should not take two hours to last--the ideal length is about ninety minutes. No, Five-Year Engagement was much too long, taking nearly five years to get on with it and end. When the writers intended to make the audience laugh, as with their "hilarious" sex/penis jokes, it was just awkward and painful. More like aggravating than painful because, for it to be painful, you have to actually like the writers at least a tad. Aside from the fact that it took a literal five years for Jason Segal and Emily Blunt's characters to finally get married, the entire duration of their on-off engagement was so pointless and uninteresting. Plus, for a movie that takes two hours to finish, you'd expect the writers to explain absolutely everything that happens within that excruciating time frame. I won't give anything away (because you'll most definitely want to watch it), but I'll simply say that there were many scenes that could have easily been erased.

Referring to the so-called humor of this movie, writers Jason Segal and Nicholas Stoller composed the type of movie only they would find amusing, as well as people like them. In other words, the film was just a collection of their own real-life situations as well as personal inside-jokes. To make a successful movie, the jokes must appeal to all audiences. Just a tip for you aspiring writers out there, including Jason Segal and Nicholas Stoller. (I'm no writer myself, but I'm confident that it's good advice.) Overall, the movie is an unorganized mess of awkward dialogues that take far too long to wrap up and supposedly sweet twists that really are just annoying because you want the movie to end. And an exceeded amount of boring montages.

www.movieriot.blogspot.com

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I so wanted the movie to end in the "fourth year", Segal getting psychotic and shooting Blunt and the professor with his bolt.

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Why did you watch it twice? I watched it once and will never watch again. I kept thinking, "why don't you just go the courthouse and get a marriage license?" Have your reception/party when you get around to it.

Only scenes I thought were funny was when Segal turned into the mountain man/hunter for a little while.

http://www.coolblaster.blogspot.com/

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I agree with this. That would have made sense. duh.

Life is Like a Dream

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The movie just plain sucks.........

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Yeah...I'm not sure why this has such a high rating. The first thing that came to my mind when I was watching this was: who the hell edited this? it just does not flow well. Everything was off about this movie; the premise, the characters (don't get me started on the sister's lame ass story line), the randomness of certain scenes (the chef cutting her finger? WHY WAS THIS A NECESSARY SCENE?!?), etc. and it was about an hour too long. The whole extra thing with them breaking up and them being in other relationships was painful to watch.

I really wanted to like this movie too because I like Jason Segal(to a certain extent) and I have a weird obsession with Emily Blunt (Flawless queen imo) but it just wasn't happening...

BOO!

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The writer's made Emily Blunt into a total, unlikeable bitch. I wasn't supporting them getting back together, I was hoping Jason Segel's character would get over her for good and restart his life.

Watching this film actually made ma angry, especially with the whole Rhys Ifans affair subplot.

And the comedy aswell... so immature and cringe-worthy most of the time. Really bad.

http://benendsbasement.blogspot.com/

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No. You're not. I have no idea how this movie doesn't have a rating of 1. I watched the first hour, then had to turn it off it was so terrible. At least you finished it at least once (brave for doing it twice, IMO). It was just so boring and whoever did the editing should win a Razzie. It did not flow at all. Never mind the humor in this movie was basically nonexistent (in direct comparison with the commercial preview which is what made me want to watch this movie in the first place).

I listened to my heart. It told me to take the elevator.

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just watched it. They had a conversation near the end where she said "its been a long time" and he replies "yeah a long time" all i could think was they are not fckin lying! omg glad i didnt go see this in cinema. soooo bored!

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I agree. Horrible. I couldn't even finish the movie. I had high expectations for this, after seeing Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Oh well.

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You're right man! That movie really sucks. I want two very precious hours of my life back! They may keep the rest 5 mins... Damn it man! Literally the worst movie I ve ever seen in my life. Even "Date Movie"[which used to be the worst movie I ve ever seen] was better than this flick.

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Agreed on all counts. This movie sucks. Do not waste your time.

The plot, direction, storyline and jokes were horrible. The best scene was the cookie monster, elmo argument.

As far as 'the message'...Apparently people who live in Michigan are unruly bearded hunters with no manners or awkward alcoholic homebodies. Asians are nerdy students, Buddhist monks or girlfriends for divorced white men. Working women will kill their family and drive their significant others into veritable insanity and don't forget that their success hinges on sleeping with the boss.

Self righteous, arrogant and a horrible 2 hours, don't waste your resources.

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I agree with the OP.

It wasn't the worst movie I have seen, but was still pretty bad. The length was one of the main problems, plus a lack of chemistry in the cast.

One thing I never worked out was what became of the whipped house-husband whom Jason Seagal's character befriended after moving to Michigan? He provided some limited highlights in the first half of the movie - then vanished - until the last scene at the wedding, where he appeared no older than the last time we saw him, despite several years having passed in the film.

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I very much agree this movie is way, way too long. They could've cut at least 40 minutes out and improved it a great deal. As of now I'd give it a 4 or 5.

A day without a buzz is a day that never was.

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I liked the beginning and the end. Everything in the middle was really boring, and it occasionally got extremley weird or awkward. The whole thing left me feeling vaguely uncomfortable.

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