"Licorice Pizza," Taylor Swift's "Bejeweled" Video, and Alana Haim

"Licorice Pizza" and its star Alana Haim sent me off learning more about Alana and her "Sister Band," Haim.

I expect many of us know that the band consists of middle sister Danielle(the quiet leader of the band; its "star") eldest sister Este(the brash Bette Midler/Lisa Kudrow comedian of the band), and Alana...the little sister known as "Baby Haim" whose role, it seems is both to be the cutest member and somewhat of the sexpot in the group(hence that bikini body on display in Licorice Pizza.)

They have honed their personalities -- Beatles style(Monkees style?) for interviews, but the three sisters have the goods as musicians, the offspring of dedicated parents who kept them musically trained and "eyes on the prize" to make it in pop rock. They did.

Paul Thomas Anderson is a friend of the family -- Mother Donna Haim was his art teacher in grade school -- and eventually turned to making Haim videos and then putting all three sisters -- and mom(without dialogue) and dad(with funny accented dialogue) into Licorice Pizza.

But the deal was: Alana Haim -- "Baby Haim" -- got the lead in the movie, the over the title billing. The sisters(playing her sisters) and parents(playing her parents) got smaller parts and Alana got all the big reviews , some acting nominations and an Oscar push (that didn't pan out).

A large number of critics really gave Alana Haim the big applause --- "A star is born!" "You can't take your eyes off her!" "The knock down drag out debut of Alana Haim as a star."

But a year later...it hasn't happened yet. Alana in 2022 dutifully joined her sisters in their first big worldwide concert tour since COVID lockdown, and reinserted herself into " a team" led by Danielle and anchored for comedy by Este.

I was pondering exactly what kind of "movie star future" Alana has when I came across the recent music video for Taylor Swift's "Bejeweled."

Taylor Swift is a bigger music star than Haim, but she has befriended them personally and professionally.

So Haim is in this music video. They don't sing or play back-up. They ACT. In an opening comedy sketch in which Taylor Swift is Cinderella(without being so named), Oscar-winner Laura Dern is the Wicked Stepmother, and Haim are the three Wicked Stepsisters.

The music video is "Written and Directed by Taylor Swift" so I suppose she has to take the blame for the rather silly comedy lines given to Laura Dern(who gives her villain part her Oscar winning line reading all) and Haim. Things start gross, too -- Swift is forced to get on her knees and scrub up Este's (graphic) vomit as Danielle suggests: "Next you should clean my bed pot." So before this video can move on to sex(and it does), it starts with other bodily functions.

Here's the thing, the point, the concern: in this rather silly opening sketch in the music video, Laura Dern is given the most to do and then -- among the Haim girls -- Danielle has "the lead," Este gets the comedy, and Alana is reduced to screaming out lines at Swift like "You SMELL!" and "See you later, STINKY!"

Yes a year after delivering PTA's well written Oscar nominated screenplay lines and acting well accordingly, here is "star aborning" Alana Haim reduced to just squawking and yelling minimal lines and being overshadowed practically by everyone else on screen.

I suppose the response would be: "Oh, what's the problem, its just some rock stars goofing off in a music video mainly for teens." True. And this: I'll bet a gazillon more people have now seen Alana Haim's performance in "Bejeweled" than have seen her work in "Licorice Pizza." That Taylor Swift gal has millions of fans.

I'm sure it wasn't intentional, but the opening "Bejeweled" skit seems to be making sure that "Baby Haim" is reduced to her original place as "1/3 of a group" with another sister as the leader. No major movie star here.

Meanwhile, Taylor Swift herself rather "places" Haim as her supporting players(when the actual singing/dancing music video begins, the Haim sisters get about one second of screen time.)

For the record:

ONE: The Haim sisters exit the skit together singing their little sorority girl novelty tune, with these lyrics:

I'm gonna be hungover
I'm gonna be hungover
I'm gonna drink a lot of different drinks and
I'm gonna be hungover!

That's their "drunk theme song." Copyrighted perhaps. THAT's Haim -- for their young fans. Licorice Pizza is not where it is at. (Eventually this year, the band forbade interviewers from bringing up Licorice Pizza in interviews.)

TWO: When the singing and music begin, the actual music video ("Written and Directed by Taylor Swift") is good stuff, especially when Ms. Swift elects to team up with modern burlesque queen/stripper "Dita von Teese" for some grown up girl-near-girl action. Ms. Swift is not a teenager anymore.

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