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100 reasons why this movie was made by barbarians

posted 13 years ago by MrPink4
4 replies | jump to latest

1. Conan is unnecessarily violent (nose part), and does not get our sympathy as a result.

2. Conan does not have more than 10 lines in the entire movie.

3. Conan is depicted as a two dimensional brutish...well...barbarian.

4. Movie is one action scene after another, many do not affect plot.

5. Action scenes are cut too quick...three to four cuts per sword swing.

6. 90M budget went where?

7. Reliance on matte painting probably done on after effects instead of some real scenery.

8. Locations are presented as if we know where they are on a map.

9. Conan shouts to the sky with his arms in the air and the camera moves above him.

10. Conan never enlightens us on what is best in life.

11-100 GO!

"Omar be coming"
-The Wire

[–] silentbob8201 13 years ago

Yer an ass just for bringing up What's Best in Life, Why would Conan quote Gengis Khan again?

[–] MrPink4 13 years ago

Because it's a remake, and it was the funniest line in the original (maybe due to Arnold's accent?)

"Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women!"

11. The new one did not have any good lines.

"Omar be coming"
-The Wire

[–] silentbob8201 13 years ago

http://voices.yahoo.com/difference-between-reboots-remakes-5857142.htm l?cat=15

[–] MrPink4 13 years ago

Of course, reboot. My my mistake. And I learned something new today.

12. Rebooting instead of remaking

"Omar be coming"
-The Wire