why was her mom so mean to her? why did she put up with it? why was she such a loser? who was the boy the old hag referred to when she said she wished it was toni's character who died instead of him? why was the old hag such a freak about the police coming to look at the dead body? I kept waiting for them having something to do wtih the girls death, but they didn't.
also, why did she want to be raped and tied up? bizarre behavior.
Her mother is clearly unable to care for herself, so I am assuming that her son, who was taking care of her (as is common in many cultures), died and that the care-taking passed to Collette's character. Her mother probably favored the son and was embittered by his death and angered that Collette's character lived instead of him. That, on top of a life of misery, has made her mother an angry old hag. She put up with it because she has been subjected to it her whole life and doesn't know anything different and/or she feels that by taking her mother's abuse she is somehow connecting with her dead brother (it's odd but it's a symptom of survivor's guilt, look it up since I'm not smart enough to explain it).
Her mother wasn't freaking out about the police (which is what I originally thought, as well), but rather the media. Watch the movie again, if you can, and you'll notice she says something to the effect of "first they ring the doorbell like they know me, next those bloodsuckers will be walking up my stairs." Collette's character then exits the house and is immediately swarmed by media, not cops, making the reference to the "bloodsuckers" the media, which makes more sense since many people feel the media (mostly the paparazzi) are bloodsuckers.
She did not necessarily want to be raped and tied up. If her mother has verbally abused her her entire life then she will have extreme difficulty making a decision that affects another person because her mother has destroyed any self-confidence she could have had. During the scene, Collette's character is trying to feel out Ribisi's character to see what he wants her to say/do. She is constantly answering "I don't know, maybe," etc, being very indecisive. She also feels that she doesn't deserve true, normal sex and that she should be raped and tied up.
All these things paint a vivid picture of Collette's character; she is beaten, downtrodden. The turning point comes when she has the guts to tell Ribisi's character that the cuts on her hand don't hurt when he kisses them (this is a big deal because it presumes that she feels she deserves something good, namely his love). Those are the cuts she received when she crushed the now-empty glass of milk that her mother threw on her. Additionally, those cuts are nearly identical to those suffered by the Dead Girl. It is all symbolic: her mother has made her into a shell of a woman; her mother (incidentally) gave her similar exterior wounds to those suffered by the Dead Girl (matching those similar interior wounds her mother has already given her); by receiving those wounds she reaches a crisis moment wherein she leaves her mother; she takes refuge in Ribisi's character and during an admittedly awkward "love" scene she has the guts to tell him she likes her, which presumes that she feels like she deserves that love.
The Dead Girl has positively influenced Collette's character's life, though in an odd way. I hope I helped, and if you're a guy then you need to become more aware of the psyche of an emotionally injured woman (it would've helped you understand the movie better, and it will help you tremendously in life), and if you're a woman I am so glad that you are not aware of the psyche of an emotionally injured woman because that would mean you are not one.
At first I thought that in "the dead girl," she saw some sort of peace and escape.
I think she was HOPING Ribisi was the killer and that he would set her free.
She was trying to help him along and let him know she was a willing victim.
That's my take on it.
She's living in hell.
She wants to be set free.
But, knowing what I actually know about being abused and being submissive...I think that she was tired of responsibility and wanted to please and not have to make any decisions.
She wasn't used to anyone being kind to her, so she just expected violence.
Maybe she expected he would kill her, but when she saw that he was kind, she saw a different kind of escape for herself.
I don't know. It's the most complex of all the stories in this film.
People say it's the only one that doesn't fit in, but I think it fits in very well, and probably sets the tone for the rest of the film.
The film is about accepting reality and letting go and closure and people wanting to be set free.
I don't agree that the son was probably taking care of her. A male child caring for a mother, waiting on her, cooking for her? Give me a break.
I just think that the son was her favorite and probably Arden was taking care of her mother the whole time.
A thought came to me about wanting to be raped: could she have suffered molestation from the brother? Maybe that's why she shouted to her mother: "Don't you talk to me about him?" She sounded angry about something other than the fact that her mother overtly favored him..
The character was just beat down. A victim of abuse at the hands of her mother and maybe her brother.