100 things we learned from Vacancy.
1. When you're traveling across California, it is never a good idea to go off the Interstate and drive through the middle of nowhere.
2. If the motel manager likes to watch movies of people being tortured, don't stay at that motel.
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3. A woman can actually crawl over rats without screaming.
4. A piece of cloth on a tiny broken window will fool the bad guys.
5. If you have a hot wife like Kate Bekinsale, try not to get in her 'bad books'.
6. Avoid running over wildlife.(Remember George in Seinfeld.)
7. If the first chamber is empty keep pulling the trigger. Some people have an empty one for safety.
8. Repair shops are closed at night.
9. If you break off the towel rack to smash a window, throw it away instead of keeping it as a weapon.
10. You are perfectly safe getting into a police car, even though murderers are running around the place.
11. If the first cop doesn't return, they don't send another til you ring again.
12. Snuff video customers are not likely to help out future victims.
13. Snuff video makers will even interrupt their viewing to serve people at the counter.
14. It is best to keep your guns out of reach, for safety's sake.
15. Why walk between rooms when you can crawl through a rat-infested tunnel.
16. If you are going out near the bad guys, remember to go unarmed.
17. You can crash your car to take care of two of the baddies and come out without a scratch.
18. No matter how many time a guy punches you or beats your head against things, you can always have the strength to blast the crap out of him with his gun.
19. If you are having marital problems, you can go visit and no one will ever suspect.
20. If you stay at a motel, avoid the videos without labels.
To tennis players love means nothing!
21. If they offer you the 'honeymoon' suite with no additional charge, DON'T ACCEPT!
22. A colony of rats will just chill in an area with no food for some reason.
23. If somebody offers to fix your car for free, they are probably setting you up.
24. Truck drivers LOVE snuff films.
25. A man can push a bookshelf up with another grown man leaning on it.
26. Those guns they keep over doorways? They are totally loaded.
27. A night of fighting for your lives will bring a marriage back together.
28. With experience, you will learn how to replace the rug over the trap door.
29. If your soon-to-be ex wife catches you watching snuff films while she was asleep you can just tell her you were trying to find the camera's 'blind spots' ;)
30. Nobody ever notices the windows are nailed shut until AFTER it is too late.
31. If you are going to kill people for a snuff film, by all means leave at least 1 car fully operational with the keys inside to be driven by the victims.
32. If you are going to spend money filming every room in a motel, don't bother filming the entrance or the back windows "just in case" one of your victims would run out there
33. If you are going to keep a secret tunnel so you can enter and kill people in their rooms - don't bother to clean it up, maintain it or remove the rats.
34.If you are going to kill people in a motel room, by all means don't bother making sure they don't have their phones on them (Amy dropped hers by accident)
35. If you are going to kill people by surprising them from the secret entrance, by all means don't draw attention to the secret entrance by... I don't know, putting a bloody apple from their car in there.
-- 36. When you happen to stop right by a closed up gas station / garage in the middle of nowhere and the guy that works there just happens to show up at your car window scaring you for the moment . Make sure you get your " free lit sparkler " after he attempts to help you fix your car and tells you that the town you are looking for is 3 miles back . -- 37. When you go into the motel to the front desk and you hear " terrified screaming " in the back don't think anything of it just go on in and register for a room with the very eccentric motel manager . -- 38. You know your not in a " quality motel " when the water you turn on in the bathroom sink is dark brown and the TV Guide type book is dated 1997 . -- 39. You know you are not in a " safe motel " when your phone keeps ringing twice , no one answers when you say " hello " , and the adjourning door to your room from the next room is banging all madly like a crazy person is behind it . -- 40. When your wife keeps insisting that they should leave after all the strange happenings moments before you just kick back on the bed and watch TV as if nothing has happened . ( Thanks jmarkoff2 for your subject post . )
41 When chasing prospective victims for a snuff film, the 3 male perps will be put off chasing you further, if you lock yourself into your hotel room behind your flimsy looking hotel door.
share42. City women have no clue what a raccoon is.
share43) If you're a bad guy fighting a girl, maybe it's not the smartest idea to throw her onto the loaded gun on the floor.
44) When you've been hiding for ages and finally come out, bad guys aren't going to suddenly come and jump at you at all...nuh uh...nope.
45) If you see cameras filming you, smash the damn things!
46) Don't stay in a motel or hotel room that has a random door connecting to another room...that's just plain bloody creepy!
47) Clothes form a magic barrier to bugs and bacteria found in filthy beds, despite your hands and head being uncovered.
48) Don't trust phoneboxes.
49) Don't trust anybody. Seriously. Even the one person who isn't a psycho will be totally inept. Just don't trust anyone, then you won't end up broken hearted....
50) A woman can be in a horror film without having to scream all the way through.
~ I hardly looked at his face. His knees were what I wished to see. ~
51. Ethan Embry's career is in the crapper.
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