Seagal - one of the greatest actors of all time

The only thing he can do well is kick some serious butt. He is no actor. He and Van Dam should hook up. They both share the same qualities.

The only thing he could show De Niro is how to wear a thousand dollar suit and still make himself look like an over-sized ape. Oh yeah, and how to speak like an eighty-year-old on a respiratory device.

Go to the loo, 'cause all the *beep* is coming out your mouth instead of your a-hole...

I'd probably never compare Seagal to Pacino. DeNiro, hmm, I don't know.

Acting reverie aside, a friend of mine is a student in Cambridge aikido school, and, when I asked him about Seagal, he told me that Steven got kicked out of his school by the school master.
I thought he meant it figuratively, but he said "No, I mean, HE GOT THROWN OUT of the school by a diminutive elderly man from a second floor staircase".

Steve is the ultimate ham actor, he makes bad acting look good, also the fat *beep* couldnt puch his way out a wet paper bag without a stunt double.

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I've never really found flaw with Steven Seagal's acting, but I think he is interesting for many other reasons.

Why does he make the films he makes? Why does he decide that no-one can really mark him in his films?

I really liked that Orange Wednesday advert where he gets to have the last word.

Didn't Jackie Chan say "I never die in my movies"? I suppose Steven Seagal said, "No-one will remember anyone getting the better of me in any of my films. I will be unbeaten."

If someone makes a slew of films, an actor should be judged by his contribution to those films. He's just a part of a team, sometimes making a greater or lesser contribution to the whole. Somehow that doesn't appaly to Seagal. He is the film.

Here are my formulae:-

n x t = m m - o = c

where n = the precise number of Seagal fans; and t is the average price they pay for the DVD of the film; o = total costs for that film; c is the capital available to the next film in the series.

I like the guy. He is always an assured master at everything. He's always been in every agency for 30 years. He has no time for people who are not on his level of mastery. i.e. everybody else. A master at things will always take down a competent villain with a face slap. The heavier he is the easier it is for him to dispose of an opponent.

There is no such thing as a good Steven Seagal film or a bad Steven Seagal film. There is just Steven Seagal in a Steven Seagal film. It's elemental. Steven Seagal is element 43. He cannot be reduced to his compnent parts without a destructive release of energy.

The next Steven Seagal film will always be set in a country where the rent is lower than the previous one.

He can really act. He delivers his lines perfectly and his face always suits the situation. DeNiro is an accomplished actor but his thespian skills would be of no avail in a Seagal film. In fact most actors refuse to be upstaged by Seagal. Kudos to Tommy Lee Jones for trying it on. The role of Hamlet is a cakewalk compared to playing opposite Steven Seagal.