Barb=love/hate her


I just started watching, I'm on season two now. I struggle with my feet for barb, of the tree wives I liked her the best but have been disliking her for her choices. I can't believe she is dumb enough to put her children in a situation like this, fine for since she seems to have low self esteem issues, but I think it's unfair what's she's going to her children.

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In real life, I think her own children, especially the two girls would have deep resentment towards her and her choices. Sarah atleast knew what the deal was and could remember what life was like before the second wife was added. I think they were portrayed as too accepting to the situation even thought they had her being against it. I could totally see them choosing to live with their grandparents if given the choice, I don't know why they were soo against them though, like at Barbs mother wedding, and they acted like they were in the worse place.Ben just wasn't that bright and let his privates dictate his life and he saw his father get what he wanted without having to choose by just having multiple wives.

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"I think her own children, especially the two girls would have deep resentment towards her and her choices"

No kidding, especially when realizing they're most likely to be married off to old dudes with multiple wives already, or (at best) be the first wife of someone whom will later replace them (sorry, "complement") with the nanny or whomever else turns the husband on.

"I think they were portrayed as too accepting to the situation even thought they had her being against it."

Having a father whom was born into such a cult doesn't help much. They simply follow their mother's lead.

"Ben just wasn't that bright and let his privates dictate his life"

And why wouldn't he? Polygamy (when statistics do not call for it like say after a war when men are scarce) was made for men, not women.

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I watched, and the ending has a clear message: everybody ESCAPED the situation thanks to Bill's death.

The fact that the family broke apart shows this, the "sister wifes" sure as heck didn't stick together anymore, did they?

And as for The Church of Bill, didn't he run off his own son Ben when he started becoming competition regarding Margene? He's just as capable of inflicting onto others what was inflicted unto him.

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What I think is that the poster was saying through bills death they were free to do what they wanted. Barb got her priesthood and Margene went on her missions around the world. Bill was sort of a obstacle as far as living their lives and got in the way of their dreams. I wonder if any of them would have remarried and lived a normal life and weather Barb and her mothers relationship would have improved with Bill dead

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Everything you need to know is spelled out in the series pilot. They are miserable and prisoners of their be;lief system (Nicky), their love for Bill (Barb), and having more babies than she can manage (Margene flatly states so).

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Everything you need to know is spelled out in the series pilot. They are miserable and prisoners of their be;lief system (Nicky), their love for Bill (Barb), and having more babies than she can manage (Margene flatly states so).

Wow, I knew this information but never applied it to the big picture as you did. When you look at it all it is sort of depressing the lengths they went to convince themselves they were doing right. I think it showed the most with Nikki as she closed herself to believing anything else but as soon as she starts thinking independently she desires to be free. But , she constantly forces herself to do otherwise.

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Well that's what compounds like Juniper Creek are for: to ensure members can NEVER think independently:
- always involved in group activities from dusk 'till dawn (no alone time)
- always burdened with either manual labour or child rearing (no time to just relax and think anything over and through calmly and thoroughly)
- all personal actions (from clothing to vocabulary) are controlled and regulated by the "leader" (cannot entertain emotions/thoughts/concepts for which you're not allowed to use the words that describe them)
- always surrounded by compound members (no outside influence)

That is why it's so hard to break free when born/raised in such places, even if you actually run away or relocate:
a) Bill:
- all his family is there (so he's bound to remain connected and continue being influenced by them)
- where did he go to when looking for a loan: Roman of all people (was he really the ONLY option? Bill was already married to Barb and thus had access to other people)
- he firmly believes the compound is a GOOD place, just has issues with the current administration (he was supposed to succeed his grandaddy the previous "leader")

b) Nicky:
- Same as Bill (born/raised at the compound, family is there, believes it's a good lifestyle and even that his daddy is a GOOD person)
- Whatever moments she has of clarity (wanting to be free) are just that: fleeting moments (Bill and her mommy/daddy/brother will never allow her to break free as long as they remain in her life)
- Like most fundie women, she's 100% Stockholmed (identifies with their abusers)

c) Barb:
- She's the one suffering/struggling/resisting the most, and thus the more pathetic (forced herself to accept a humiliating situation for the love of a man to whom she's just one of many)
- No matter what she or even Bill want, it's too late to go back (in season 1 when they sneak around and Bill apparently infers he's considering/longing for monogamy with her, she ultimately has to let that dream die due to the fact that the other 2 sister wives are already part of the family and their kids are Bill's and thus Barb's kid's half brothers, so she's indeed trapped)
- I'll never understand how she got suckered into polygamy, even with the plot device of she dying of cancer and thus having Nicky replace her if she did, and never mind the nanny (Margene was the family nanny).

d) Margene:
- she's the least damaged (doesn't know/care better)
- she can clearly take care of herself if it came to that (jewellery business she started)
- she has no religious attachment and only likes the situation because it's convenient (like a sororiety)

That's why Barb and Margene make the most of Bill's death: because they're not mentally trapped like he was or Nicky still is.

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where did he go to when looking for a loan: Roman of all people (was he really the ONLY option? Bill was already married to Barb and thus had access to other people)


I have always found this part a bit odd. I can see him going to Roman to get a loan for the store, but why did he need him for Barbs health? We know Barb had come from a very well to do family and they were on good terms, even if they weren't I doubt they would refuse to help her, so why didn't they help with the cost. I wanted to know how he managed to convince her to take on Nikki as well. She may have accepted that she would step in if she died but I cant see her agreeing so easily.

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"I have always found this part a bit odd."

The eldest daughter Sarah explains it all (when asked by the lesbian friend): her dad comes from there (meaning he never truly left, kinda like "you can get the boy out of the ghetto..."), and her mom loves Bill too much to leave him (and thus has become 100% Stockholmed in identifying with Bill's desires over her own).

Everything else is word salad. That is why the family fractured and parted ways after Bill's death (despite the women being "married to each other" also, which suddenly ceased to matter all that much).

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That is why the family fractured and parted ways after Bill's death


The family didn't fracture and part ways after Bill's death. The final scene is an epilogue and shows that they are very much a family.

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What ending did you see?
- Barb went her separate way after finding herself a religion that fit her fancy (just as Frank recommended if she didn't like being a member of a religion where "God gave men the power"). Whether she remains in the same house as before is immaterial. She became a cult leader in fact.
- Margene found herself a humanitarian career, where she spends most of her time. That is in dorect opposition to what a poly fundie family would have her do, thus has also gone her separate way, regardless of her visiting (she spends most of her time away).
- Nikky is the only one whose fate we don't know for sure. She was as much a prisoner mentally as Bill was , no matter where she goes or whom she marries.

But since they didn't marry Joey or Don (as they would be expected to do after Bill's death), they clearly are not continuing polygamy (unless you can point to Bill's successor in that household). If keeping in touch in a SATC kind of way counts for you as polygamy, I got one word for you: lesbianism (as in Don's wives whom ran off).

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I also don't know the epilogue you saw but it wasn't the real one. In the epilogue,

-Barb received the Priesthood she had longed after and became the head of The Church of Bill.

-Margene committed herself to a life of humanitarianism, while being a missionary for the Church of Bill/Barb

-Nicki stayed behind to fulfill her destiny of being the Earth Mother to not only her children, but also Margene's.

-Ben married his sister's lesbian friend and lived happily ever after.
-Sarah came back to celebrate her mother's success with her own child in tow.

How did you miss the point of the epilogue? It ended with all the women being empowered.

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Empowered or brainwashed (Barb left the church of Bill and became leader of a different denomination) the fact is they are no longer a polygamous family (no husband porking the 3 of them) and are sure as heck not raising their kids to follow their footsteps.

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There were some moments in the first season when my heart ached for her. 1) When the "affair" was over, she was so sad, and 2) when she was disqualified from being "mother of the year."

So well acted by Jeanne Tripplehorn. Bill was Barb's husband, until she had to share him. I can't even imagine going along with such foolishness. Really such a ridiculous religious belief, polygamy.

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I love Barb immensely. I don't think she wanted Bill to marry other wives; it was very apparently in the episode The Affair from season 1. I felt like Bill sort of regretted marrying other wives too because in the episode The Affair, Barb was constantly on his mind and when he was spending time with the other wives, he seemed distant and aloof. Barb was definitely his favorite; I think they sort of both regretted moving into this life style.

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I think she went along with polygamy because she loved Bill so much and she couldn't bare the thought of losing him. She wasn't never into polygamy in the first place and I don't believe she ever liked it. If you watch the episode "The Affair" from season 1 and the episode after that, it would help you to understand her true feelings on the matter.

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Been a long time since I watched it, but I recall Barb changing by the end of the show she seemed to have fully (or at least partially) embraced polygamy... or am I forgetting things again?

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You are probably right; I haven’t seen the last season in a long time.

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