Just re-watched the show...
...and it's just as good as I remembered it! I'm finding myself as mentally fixated and immersed as I was 8 years ago! (Damn, has it been that long??) And the wound still feels as fresh too...
I've been thinking about how deep an impact this show had on me back when it was on, just like so many others I've read comments from on this board. I picked up the show when the pilot first aired. I watched the first season rather casually the first time around. I really didn't pick up on the underlying story until much, much later. I think I was drawn in by the atmosphere and feel of the show, the time period and the surface story just based on the characters themselves. I remember the season 1 finale was really amazing and gripping and I hoped there would be a second season. Then the wait was FOREVER until I finally began to see commercials promoting the next season of Carnivale. I was excited so I made sure to tune in. I still watched rather casually until The Road to Damascus (BIG Ben and Sofie fan, as you might be able to tell from my profile ID :). After that it was all I could think about, I started searching online for discussion groups and then realized that I had no clue what I had been watching. I was like, "What the *bleep* is an Avatar??" "What are these people talking about??" Apparently, even though I liked the show, I had been watching it in a fog. So I bought the first season and began to re-watch it, REALLY paying attention this time and finally realized just how deep and layered this show really was. I was glued to the final 6 episodes of season 2 and then began the waiting game with everyone else as I HELD MY BREATH hoping to hear that the show was going to be renewed for a third season. Well, everyone knows how that turned out...
I have never felt such true and utter heartbreak over a TV show being cancelled before. I literally grieved. I was an active member of the Yahoo! group at the time. I sent HEAPS of letters and tarot cards to HBO pleading for them to reconsider. In my grief, I funneled some of that energy into making a few fanvids that are still on YouTube under the same profile name as here. I participated in online auctions and purchased one of the Flora pictures used in the show (I was able to find my picture in the show and Nick is actually holding it!), a plastic "Ben" trench knife complete with blue paint stains, and several of the scripts which I poured over. I attended CarnyCon in LA and still regard that as one of the best experiences of my life and am so grateful to everyone who made that happen. I lent out my DVDs to EVERYONE I KNEW! I even purchased the DVDs for some people (and if you recall, when they were first released they went for around $100 a pop!) I got SO MANY PEOPLE hooked on the show. Unfortunately, this was after the cancellation, but still... It became the main topic of conversation at my office.
It's been a while since I lived in that world. But re-watching it over the last week or so brought it all back. I loved it so much. I know I will be able to re-watch it for the rest of my life and always find something new I hadn't noticed before. We didn't get the whole story, but I'm grateful for what we did get. I will always hold out hope that HBO will finally allow Knauf to complete his story in some form.
"Everything's impossible, 'til it ain't..."
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