MovieChat Forums > American Pie (1999) Discussion > Is sex really that important at that age...

Is sex really that important at that age?

posted 8 years ago by AdamGoMovies
4 replies | jump to latest

On the risk of sounding fake and lame in an internet message board, I want to say that I lost my virginity when I was 21 years old. In my teenage years, I was constantly involved in sports, especially swimming which gave me a good defined body. My face was alright, and I had a wide social group of both girls and boys.

Until the age of 21 however, I had not met a single girl whom I genuinely liked. I could never force myself to have sex with a girl i didn't know/ didn't like just for the thrill of it and getting rid of the virgin label. In fact I felt it was better to be a virgin and lose it with someone you care about, than the other way around.

The idea is also that in my group of friends, all throughout we never really did have a huge focus on it nor did we obsess in sex as much as teenagers do in this movie. I understand it's all in the context of a movie and that many things are exaggerated, but I really could not relate to this film at all.

I enjoyed it overall.

[–] JMRcurve17 8 years ago

I lost mine midway through my senior year of high school. Prior to that point, the opportunity had never realistically presented itself. The vast majority of my friends or people at school didn't know or care if you were or weren't a virgin, and I didn't know of anyone who had a pact or anything of that nature. I too was involved in sports, and some of the other athletes would jokingly give me a hard time about it, but I certainly never felt pressured or anything like that. My mindset was "if it happens, it happens." Eventually it did. I won't lie and say it wasn't a big deal, but it also wasn't something I obsessed over or felt like I needed to do it by a certain time.

[–] dl4060 8 years ago

There was plenty of pressure to lose your virginity where I was. I think the movie is pretty accurate about that. Also, boys that age DO think about sex that way, it is a physical need not an emotional one. If you wanted to wait until you actually found a girl you liked you were definitely in the minority. I lost mine the summer before my senior year in high school. I was very drunk and not that into the girl, but I was happy to get it out of the way. It definitely relaxed me and made me more confident around girls my senior year. In and of itself it is not a big deal, but with all the pressure wrapped up in it it can be a big deal. In a sense losing it was more important that the actual act. If there was not so much surrounding it it would not have been a big deal. When so much of your time is spent thinking about sex it is natural to be very curious about it. When it comes down to it the act itself is not all that big of a deal.

If you needed to care about someone to have sex and you are male you are definitely in the minority. I was a jock, but even the theater types I knew just wanted to lose it. It is one of the biggest rights of passage for young men. It is big for young women too, but in a different way.

[–] DusterJ79 8 years ago

most boys around the age of 12 - 19 think about one thing, and that is sex.. sure you have other things to occupy your time, like sports and stuff but ultimately when you're alone and chilling, your mind drifts back to that one thing...

[–] liscarkat (18600) 5 years ago

I did not lose my virginity until I was nineteen and I met a delightful twenty-nine-year-old mom who decided to teach me a few things (bless you, Marilyn, wherever you are). But it wasn't abstinence or being distracted by sports that kept me pure. From about the age of thirteen I was fairly obsessed with sex, it was extremely important. It was shyness that held me back.