MovieChat Forums > The Virgin Suicides (2000) Discussion > The parents (especially the mom) were s...

The parents (especially the mom) were so dumb

posted 13 years ago by Its_Santana_Bitch
14 replies | jump to latest

let's not even get started on the horrible and unrealistic parenting tactics, but making lux suffer so much for doing what? being a teenage girl? ESPECIALLY after you already had 1 child commit suicide???

I'm surprised the other girls weren't taking out of that house once cecilia committed suicide. didn't anybody question what was going on in that house??

...Checking how many f#cks will be given today... Sorry, no f#cks will be given today.

[–] riot_star 13 years ago

I always found it weird that despite the fact everybody sensed something wrong was wrong in the house nobody thought to do anything...apart from the boys.

Life is only a dream and we are the imagination of ourselves - Bill Hicks

[–] patronizing_bunnyrabbits 13 years ago

You found that weird? That's how people are. No one wants to get involved. No one wants to dictate to other people how they should raise their children. In any case, there was nothing to indicate that any of the girls were in imminent danger from their parents actions.

"Sacred cows make the best hamburger."

[–] Eleanor_1991 13 years ago

I couldn't have said it better myself 'patronizing bunnyrabbits'.
To the OP, that's life and reality for you.

"You and me, You and me, Nobody baby but you and me" - Blue Valentine

[–] z_imdb-492-389923 12 years ago

It's not unrealistic at all. I know families like that. And everyone else just stands by and watches them screw up their kids.

[–] fiatlux-1 12 years ago

I thought the parents were beyond morons too. Why do parents think that being super strict is a good thing?!!! You only end up raising severely rebellious kids, who become sociopathic or otherwise severely troubled adults!
These parents were just NUTS though; not letting your kids ride in cars because of accidents?!! They rode in cars with their parents didn't they?

As for why people didn't intervene, not only is it common for people to look the other way (even more so with 'odd neighbors') but this film was set in the '60 or '70s (can't remember which) and people tended to stay out of people's business even more back then. Child abuse was still mostly thought of as 'poor people's issue' only.

"I'd say this cloud is Cumulo Nimbus."
"Didn't he discover America?"
"Penfold, shush."

[–] PurpleLemonadeDinosaur 12 years ago

It's okay to be strict, but to become overbearing is where the problem begins. You can be tough and still give your child the freedom to make his or her own decisions. Children will find out on their own what's bad and what's good. However, if you try to hide the real world from them, they won't be able to decipher between that. There's nothing wrong with telling your child sex is inappropriate, but parents need to be weary of the fact that stifling that knowledge from them will make sex appear "desirable" and "forbidden fruit." I'm glad my parents were never strict like that. They let me know about sex and all of the things that went on in this world, but firmly let me know that it was not appropriate for someone my age to get involved with those things. I think you brought up a good point about "poor people's issues." It's clear that many who have watched this film did not think the girls were going through enough to warrant their suicide. Many think you have to be ugly, poor, and unloved to not experience depression and suicidal thoughts. That's probably why many young girls kill themselves because no one bothers to reach out to them because they assume everything is going to be okay.

You love me more than sunny summer days.

[–] 12 years ago

[deleted]

[–] ilahilda 12 years ago

I think that's what the multiple boxes of tampons symbolized, female domination. The dad could have spoke up if he really wanted too. It might have saved the girls.

[–] deem714 11 years ago

this doesn't mean that I agree with the parents but I have witnessed and experienced similar discipline.

the entire thing of burning records was a form of discipline. the reason why they weren't allowed to date might be because the parents are scared shi7less of what could happen to their girls. and when they finally DO let them go out on a date... what happens.... one of the girls gets 'taken advantage of' and is left in the middle of a field. the dickwad didn't even wake her up or take her home.

the discipline of burning records [and if you take notice of the TYPE of records they were burning] was the mothers way of showing 'what did I tell you???'

the same thing kind of happened to me -- blaming the victim for how not street smart the victim was brought up/taught. in my mother's eyes it wasn't the culprit's fault for doing something but the victim's fault for 'how could you let this happen???

Oh Thank you God! Thank you so BLOODY much!Basil Fawlty

[–] ilahilda 11 years ago

It seems to me Lux consented to have sex, so she was not raped. Although the guy was a jackass to leave her there for a sicko to actually rape her, thank goodness she wasn't and had money for a cab.

[–] deem714 11 years ago

I didn't mean victim of rape I meant a victim of 'her having sex to begin with'.

parents are fvked up.

Oh Thank you God! Thank you so BLOODY much!Basil Fawlty

[–] 11 years ago

[deleted]

[–] freebird1987 11 years ago

I agree. The parents were pretty dumb.

[–] pypsqweek 10 years ago

I thought Lux was more dumb than her parents. She knew her parents were highly religious and crazy. She even had to beg them to go on the date. The moment they do for the first time, she has sex with her boyfriend and break curfew. That was just stupidity. It's not the fact she had sex with the guy but the fact she didn't plan better or be more cautious as to not get caught by her crazy family.