MovieChat Forums > My Best Friend's Wedding (1997) Discussion > I don't like how they portray platonic m...

I don't like how they portray platonic male/female friendships


I watched this when I was a teenager and I'm now closing in on 30 and rewatching.

I an a woman and I have a male best friend and I've had lots of male friends over my lifetime and Michael and Jules do NOT act like friends. They flirt, they reminisce about sexy times together, he says "wow, you look beautiful" all doey eyed to her when she enters a room. There is a sexual and romantic aspect to their interactions and their friendship will not last. Kimmie had every right to feel threatened because neither of them acted platonic for one moment.

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Makes sense. They did have sex. And I would imagine they were "more than friends" from the get go. Just kept each other on the side "in case". Such as their promise to each other to marry, if they haven't yet by 28 wit someone. I couldn't marry my best friend.

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There is a sexual and romantic aspect to their interactions ...
That's because Jules, as she makes very clear late in the film, had never consigned Michael to the Friend Zone, though initially he may have believed that had occurred.🐭

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I agree and I'm glad to see an opinion like this. Usually the best friends you find think it's okay to be "platonically romantic" which is just odd-looking, at the least and I wonder how they would feel if their partner did this to them. But it ironically only bothers them if their friend does it to them and chooses their partner over them.

I was beginning to lose faith in love and others who think this is acceptable. It's a very strange thing though...We all have exes and past loves but why does the best friend thing make it so complicated? I can understand how exes can still want to be close but it just can't be the same...I used to think movies like this were cute but now I find it wrong...No one ever thinks of the newer girlfriend as a newer "best friend"...No, she's "just a fling", expendable, but friends? Noooo, they last for life, right? I actually know how to have a best guy friend and do it appropriately. My trick is never getting too close in the first place. But "best friend" could have different meanings to people.

Also, my situation was a little different anyway...Me and the other were both "new" to the same guy but he chose me to date while he grew closer as friend to the other to the point where it made me uncomfortable. Sorry for sharing personal crap, but if anyone knows a movie like this, let me know...I want to see it haha

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As Harry says in When Harry Met Sally, all your male friends want to have sex with you. It is biology.

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Same here. I have friends of both genders and we hang out together,in all honesty there is no element of sex or romance present.

Sometimes I feel like movie makers are not people like us which is why they do not understand that just like guys have brother from another mother , they can have sisters from another mother too. Or may be they do not believe in platonicity, which is a reality, at all.

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To me they had a Friends with Benefits type of vibe, not purely platonic at all. At the very least they felt a curiosity for each other.


Sometimes a movie or tv show plot is so stupid that only the stupid can understand it.

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You seem to be missing the entire point of the movie, it is about best friend, male-female relationship, where there clearly was something romantic or at least sexual about their relationship. I too have had serval girl friends, where that was all we ever were was friends, one of my best friends is a girl and she is very gorgeous, and I may have had a crush on her for a small time, but there was never anything romantic about our relationship.

But the point of this story is that sometimes, you do fall for your best friend, and sometimes it doesn't go both ways.

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Nope I haven't missed the point at all, I was saying much the same thing you just did.

They were never purely platonic, even if they had never had sex they at one point or another had sexual/romantic feelings for each other.


Sometimes a movie or tv show plot is so stupid that only the stupid can understand it.

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Uh yeah, that scene where he sucks the ring off Jule’s finger was so weird. Like, who does that? Very uncomfortable to watch.

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And she is obviously is very turned on by it. But for him it is just a means of getting the ring off her finger, he isn't even amused that she tried it on.

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I think for Michael she was just a tom boy he could have some fun with. Julianne isn't the type you marry whereas Kimmie is a lot more stable, even if less fun.

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