MY REVIEW OF 'MKA'!!!
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MORTAL KOMBAT: ANNIHILATION(1997)
(Directed by John R. Leonetti)
Plot: The survivors of the Mortal Kombat tournament are surprised when the emperor of the otherworld suddenly plans on invading their realm. They must fight back, a lot.
Review:
I’ve already gotten some criticism for giving a positive review of “Mortal Kombat”. But liking that film isn’t difficult for someone who watches DTV Steven Seagal and Jean-Claude Van Damme films. Of course, with that said, I find it almost impossible to like “Mortal Kombat: Annihilation”, which I will refer to as “Mortal Kombat 2”, or “MK2”. There are so many things wrong with this movie, I’d have to go through scene by scene to get to them all. I don’t want to waste any more time on this movie, so I’m definitely not going to do that! Every sequence seems to showcase something wrong with it, such as the fact we’re supposed to believe that even if Liu turned into a dragon, he wouldn’t be able to counter teleportating so no one should be blaming him as much as they do. Or the fact that Raiden thinks that Jax’s super empowered arms are his weakness, even though without them he would’ve been killed quickly. Or the fact that the word ‘animality’ appears at all. Is that even a real word?
The first movie ended on a cliffhanger where the Emperor Shao Kahn suddenly appeared as a giant, fake CGI effect and Raiden(Lambert) said his “I don’t think so” line in a cool(yet campy) way. It annoyed me, and for once I almost wish the ending wasn’t recreated. The film ends with stock footage from the original movie, with a narrator(who I think is the new Raiden) explaining that Liu Kang(Shou) won the tournament. The movie takes place RIGHT after the cliffhanger happens, with a non-CGI Shao Kahn(Thompson, who looks like Michael Berryman and the villain from “Highlander” somehow had a creepy love child), appearing with his dopey looking generals and his foot soldiers. He makes the typical, “God created the world in 7 days, I will destroy it in 6” speech. Why 6 days? Why not now? Well, this is explained but it still makes me wonder why. We’re a bit confused because characters are played by different actors. Linden Ashby, Bridgette Wilson and Christopher Lambert are replaced with Chris Conrad, Sandra Hess and James Remar as Johnny Cage, Sonya Blade and Raiden. While Lamberts replacement might not bother a lot of people, especially as many dislike the actor, us B movie fans instantly become worried. What script could’ve been so bad that even Lambert wanted to stay away? I actually have heard that Lambert was simply unavailable, but the character seems too different for me to completely believe this, unless the script suffered severe rewrites early on. Anyway, Shao Kahn takes Sonya(Hess) hostage, because being a hostage comes naturally for her. Johnny Cage(Conrad) attempts to save her by using his shadow kick. Many complained at this as Cage apparently had no super powers like this in the first movie, but it looked a lot like the move he used on Scorpion so I think they’re wrong about that. Cage gets his ass kicked and replaces her as the hostage. Raiden then uses some attack on the Generals that traps them in some lightening barrier. Er, why didn’t Raiden just use that on the Emperor? Anyway, they make a trade but Shao Kahn is evil so he just kills Johnny. This all happens within the first 10 minutes, and I already hate this movie.
So Raiden, Liu, Sonya, and Kitana(Soto) all escape and decide to decide to split up, even though Raiden has just said they need to work together. Raiden decides to send Sonya to get Jax(Williams), played by a different actor from the first movie and acts nothing like him. This is also sort of confusing, as why would they need Jax. If he was so special, why wasn’t he chosen for the previous tournament. So Raiden and Sonya leave to do that. Raiden actually goes to visit the elder gods, who state they will do nothing even though Kahn has broken the rules. Seriously, why create so many retarded rules if you’re just going to allow them to be broken? Even George W. Bush would make better elder gods than these guys. Liu and Kitana go to do something which I don’t remember. Oh yeah, they have to find Night Wolf(litefoot; yes, that‘s the actors name) However, they are attacked by Smoke, saved by Sub Zero’s little brother(Cooke, showcasing no acting skills). Then Scorpion attacks, fights Sub Zero and uses teleporting skills to kidnap Kitana, proving that in this universe, women really suck as fighters. Anyway, the movie becomes a rescue film from here, and of course they have to defeat Shao Kahn.
If my plot synopsis seems jumbled to you, that’s because the plot in itself doesn’t really make any sense. They keep throwing in prophecies and random subplots that are never really tied in. What happened to Night Wolf’s training? If there are so many prophecies that have to do with the plot, why is Raiden so surprised that the Emperor broke the rules? It isn’t helped that someone really fractured the narrative, making the plot seem even thinner(how is that possible?). There are also some extreme plot holes, such as Liu seeing Kahn’s face even though he has yet to see it at that point. Also, I still don’t get the issue with Jade(Pantaeva). So what she part of the test or not? It seems like they’re making up the story as they go along.
The movie is just one big excuse for constant fight scenes. Story? What story! Let’s just get into the action. Why am I complaining? Well for one, non-stop fighting does get old after awhile. I learned this from Takashi Miike’s “Izo”, where the titular character just goes from one scene, kicks ass, then goes to another to kick some more ass. But even then, it’s not helped that the fight scenes aren’t very good. They weren’t great in the predecessor, but this movie relies too much on crappy wire fu and obvious stunt doubles. It seems like they tried too hard to appease fans of the games, as they only really want the action. But what about the rest of us? Most of the characters here aren’t even named. Yet we’re expected to know everyone from the games, so I guess it’s our fault. Yeah right! Another issue is how Scorpion comes back for one scene without any explanation. Apparently in the game he’s an immortal mercenary. So he must’ve only been hired to capture Kitana. They couldn’t exposit one line of dialogue to explain that?
One of the reasons I liked the first movie was its eerie locations. Lots of detail went into them to make them attractive or menacing. For this sequel, all the sets look super imposed. They look obviously blue screened and it surprises me that the director actually is a cinematographer(who even worked on the first movie!). The CGI, which looked bad in the first movie but at least was contained for only a few scenes, is exploited to even worse effect here. Why do you need all those scenes of fake CGI looking dragons? Maybe the CGI was impressive when the movie came out, but boy does it not age well. Also, I need to mention Baraka’s horrible Halloween mask. Seriously, that mask looks even worse than the goblin mask in “Troll 2”.
Alright, what else can I bash this movie for? The directing is horrible. It makes Anderson look like Orson Welles and even Uwe Boll seems more competent. The actors are poorly staged and his idea of creating menace is having the villains wave their arms all scary like. God, this feels more like a “Power Rangers” movie. Shao Kahn is also the worst villain I’ve ever seen. He kills his general for not making his victims beg. His general rightfully defends himself by stating he thought it would be a mistake for them to live any longer but Kahn will hear nothing of it. Being as Kahn gets scolded by his Father for not doing the same thing, this might have been intentional to show how Kahn has some issues thanks to his Father. But really, he acts like a little kid and I couldn’t take him seriously for it. Even the Bond villains are better villains than this guy.
Robin Shou(Liu) seems lost and confused, as if he’s wondering why the hell is he in this movie. This may have been the demon that killed his career in the U.S. James Remar(Raiden) sucks. Lambert’s performance was Raiden echoed the first films quality: Silly but fun. Remar is just wooden, boring and emotionless. Also, the character just gets his ass kicked constantly. I actually am glad they cast Sondra Hess(Sonya) instead of Wilson. She’s less bitchy and I think she’s more attractive. Lynn Red Williams(Jax) actually does the best job and is the only one to come out looking good. Talisa Soto(Kitana) still can’t act and Musetta Vander(Sindel) makes an ass of herself as the mother. She also looks too much like Vampira meets “The Bride of Frankenstein”. Brian Thompson(Shao Kahn) makes a bad character look even worse. I’d be embarrassed if I was him. Irina Pantaeva(Jade) didn’t do anything for me appearance wise and her acting flat out sucks.
On the positive side, I have to give this movie some credit for getting into the action swiftly. The movie has a fast pace and some of the atmospheric lighting from the first film returns. It has potential crowning moments of cool during a few sequences, such as when Sub Zero uses an ice clone to deflect Scorpion’s attack. Unfortunately, the poor staging and weak special effects ruin it. Everything the first film does right, this one fails. Everything the first film did wrong, this succeeds way too much in recreating. I’d say this isn’t the worst video game adaptation, which still goes to “Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li”, but only because this still has that cool theme song.
Violence: PG-13. Some.
Nudity: PG-13. Some sexual references.
Overall: “Mortal Kombat 2: Annihilation” sucks as a movie and as an adaptation. Avoid.
1/4 Stars
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