MovieChat Forums > The Man in the Moon (1991) Discussion > Do you think Maureen was in the wrong?

Do you think Maureen was in the wrong?


If not, why?
If so, tell how you would have handled things differently.


So after looking at another post I think she was in the wrong but only at a certain point. As stated by another post Maureen && Court hardly talked or hung out and they ended up having sex && "falling for one another"...while on the other hand Danii && Court have talked and hung out and gottenn to know each other && that age difference monster reared its ugly head....I truly think Court only lusted for Maureen because he couldn't have Dani. Maureen was like Dai only older && with more experience && Maureen maybe liked Court because he was different, nice, sweet and gentle. But whether or not they loved or lusted for another is beside the point. They both knew that Dani had a thing for him and if they felt themselves starting to fall for one another it could've at least been nice to have a head's up fro either Maureen or Court...mainly Maureen since she is her sister. I wouldn've at least told her that her && Court has been feeling something for one another.

reply

Yeah I do. Maureen was the older sister too, she knew what it was like to feel that way for someone for the first time. No one really ever gets over their first real crush. She crushed Dani.

Court and Maureen's relationship was purely lust. Court and Dani actually had chemistry. They actually knew each other.

reply

I don't think Maureen was in the wrong because she had waiting all her life for someone like Court. Maureen was in many ways in the same place as Dani.

reply

I don't think so too. Dani was young and had a crush on Court. She was new to this and didn't know exactly what she was feeling. For girls as young as Dani, they condfuse having a "crush" on someone as "love". I think all young girls and boys go through that confusion since it is all new to them. As for Maureen, I agree that she has been waiting for someone like Court and I guess has been waiting too.

reply

I think it was a lame excuse Maureen gave to Dani "I wanted to be close to you"... What was that about? Maureen chose losers and it seems to me that as Dani spoke of Cort, Maureen liked what she heard.
One scenario would be what if they were older and Dani and Maureen's man were "in love" with one another. Would Maureen be understanding? I think not. Apples and Oranges. Yes forgiving is a nice way of letting go and moving forward but ever heard of karma? Who is to know that Maureen wont be going after all of Dani's future beaus because she wants to be close to Dani?

In the end I guess I would like to have been told rather than watch it happen and the both them stand there and tell me that they didnt want to hurt me. Why because she is so young? Heads up older peeps, Dani was very mature and smart enough to know what was going on between the two of them.

DjNanci70

reply

I think it was a lame excuse Maureen gave to Dani "I wanted to be close to you"


That's not what she said. She said "I WANT to be close to you." I saw this when it was first released in 91 and many many times since, it's one of my favorite movies, and I've never heard "wantED". She was saying she still wants to be close to her sister.

"Nobody puts Baby in a corner."

reply

[deleted]

Yes, because of the speed it all happened. If he had told Dani for the last time that she was too young for him, once and for all, and then he and Maureen had spent some time getting to know each other and be friends first, it would have been all right. But Maureen says ONCE that Dani is here sister, and then she's ready to do the guy, who being a 17 year old boy, is ready to go with someone his own age.

But then, we'd have had a MUCH longer movie and it might not have been done as well.

Maureen should have not hurt her sister without giving Dani a chance to sort out her feelings. She should have given them both some time and space. He died because he was so blown away by what he did that he couldn't get his mind off it. Older guys can have sex and still go to work and operate farm machinery. I don't care if Maureen did think she'd been waiting for someone like Cort all her life. It's not like she'd been waiting forty years and then knew the guy well enough to really know he was what she wanted. She didn't know much about him at all.

reply

He died because he was so blown away by what he did that he couldn't get his mind off it. Older guys can have sex and still go to work and operate farm machinery.

Are you actually blaming Maureen for his death? It sure sounds like it. Unbelievable.

Newsflash--when you're 18, idealistic and in thrall to your hormones--sh*t happens. S*x happens. It's no one's fault. It's both their faults. It's life. Grow the h*ll up, and realize that Maureen HAD to hurt Dani, in a way. It's painful but Dani has to realize she and Court, although they have an interesting connection, are not the same as Maureen and Court. It's just not the same, at all. Court realized that immediately, as soon as he met Maureen.

As for the whole "they should've waited"--they DID wait, in a way. They were trying to hide it until they could explain to Dani. But they didn't wait to act on it, because that would've been unrealistic--sometimes your passion is so great, you simply HAVE to act on it. That too is life.

reply

True, but most people tended to like the Court, Dani chemistry as the Court Maureen chemistry killed the 'magic' feeling you had with the original pair. Sadly, I still disagree with you when you say Maureen wasn't in the wrong. I say so, because she hid from her sister. It's been my experience that when I've hidden something important, I was thinking of myself and not about the way I would affect those involved. I grew up and realized what I was doing after the tables turned on me.

reply

I think Dani was way too young for anything that serious, but I do think her sister should have had more consideration for her feelings.

reply

BUT...if you remember, Dani's momma said she was 13 when she met her husband and didn't think he noticed her and thought she was a kid.....18 years later they were still in love and happily married. Girls in the south mature and get married younger, even today. Maureen was wrong. Like their daddy said near the end, they are sisters forever....never let a guy come between you and and your sister or best-friend.

reply

Well, it's 2.5 years later, but here's my take on it. When I was 16 my older sister STOLE my boyfriend. She slept with him, got pregnant, and then they got married.
Back then I was devastated, but now, almost 50 years later all I can say is "Whew! Thank gawd for older sisters! I could have married that bum!"
:)

Life is a journey not a destination. Fear nothing.

reply

Maureen was really wrong. I mean honestly if she absolutly HAD to have Court she should have been honest with her sister about it.

" There is no normal "

reply

[deleted]

[deleted]

How can u say u cant help who you fall in love with?? I think it should be obvious to anyone that the real love in this movie was between Dani and Court...what Maureen and Court had was purely LUST..Court loved Dani but he knew he couldnt love her in EVERY way he wanted to and it was obviously something he battled within himself...it took about a minute for Maureen to decide that she didnt care that her sister was in love with this dude..and another minute for her to decide to have sex with him..that is not love...she completely neglected her relationship and consideration with/for her sister and she is the direct cause of Courts death..the whole entire movie focused on the relationship between Dani and Court and there was about 15 minutes dedicated to what Maureen and Court had..ten for the sex..and 5 for the googly hormone raging first meeting between them..im sorry but that is not love..and its definitely not an excuse for breaking your sisters heart..she is WRONG in every way possible

reply

Yes, I do. It wasn't about the love. It was about not handling business properly. Nobody can prevent the pain of unrequited love, but we can show people respect by being honest with them. I would hope that I'd have gone to my dad or my mom for help in setting the situation right with Dani before I went sneaking off with Court.

reply

You sound sick. Maureen is not to blame for Court's death. Crazy. Why are there so many self-righteous 12 year olds on this board?

Court's death is bad luck, nothing more.

reply

I'm 56, thank you very much, and as I said in my earlier post, Maureen was wrong and I feel that way due to the fact that she knew she was hurting her sister, and her sister should have been more important to her than a guy she'd known for a few days, and also because of the speed at which the relationship progressed. You can't say you've been waiting all your life for someone when you're seventeen and not sound like a moron. They did not take the time to get to know each other well enough to know if they were in like, love, or lust.

reply

I don't get it, you claim that both Court and Maureen loved Dani and yet you are only blaming Maureen for betraying her. Court didn't betray her sleeping with her SISTER!?!? Even if he didn't have feelings for her, it is in bad taste to sleep with the sister of a girl who is your good friend and you know is in love with you. That's the kind of stuff that leads to years of therapy and uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinners.

For me I consider Maureen and Court's behavior to be that of inexperienced children who do stupid stuff and don't think of the consequences. I don't think either of them intentionally wanted to hurt Dani but they did it anyway because they were both self-involved. For me I am more willing to forgive Maureen because she didn't know about what was at the heart of the relationship between Dani and Court like he did. But either way they did something stupid because they were too young and selfish to think of Dani. They didn't want to hurt her they just did.

reply

I don't think she was in the wrong. If anything, Court was in the wrong for leading Dani on their entire friendship. Court kissed Dani knowing full well that she had a crush on him and he didn't even explain to her that he only thought of her as a friend. He had a chance to during their last encounter but instead just brushed her off.

Maureen even resisted Court at first because she was thinking of Dani's feelings. However, you can't help who you fall for and for Maureen, Court was everything she was looking for in a guy; she finally fell in love for the first time.

I do think the two of them could have told Dani sooner seeing as both of them knew she really liked Court. It was pretty heartbreaking to watch Dani's expression when she saw her sister come home from a night spent with her first "love"

Anybody order a Love Burger? Well done

reply

Maureen was wrong because she slept with Court without speaking to her sister first about her feelings for him knowing how crazy Dani was about him. You don't do that to your sister. I can't blame Maureen for liking him though but she should have handled it differently.

reply

Maureen probably didn't tell Dani before hand because she knew she would feel guilty about it and didn't want to deal with that. I know she was the older sister and since Dani is the main character it is really easy to empathize with her, but don't forget that Maureen was still a kid too.

reply

Maureen was totally in the wrong. She stomped all over her sister's feelings for lust. I guess some would call it love at first sight, but that's ridiculous, you cannot love someone you know nothing about. It was lust, plain and simple.

For those saying she had been "waiting all her life" for someone like Court and therefore was more deserving of him than Dani was....please, she was 17. Since Dani was told by her father that she wasn't old enough to date at 14, I would guess the appropriate age wasn't until 15 or 16, which means Maureen had been dating for 1, maybe 2 years. That hardly equals waiting her whole life.

And honestly, what would have happened if Court hadn't died? Would he and Maureen have fallen madly in love, married and lived happily ever after? Doubtful, she was off to Duke in a few weeks on a scholarship. She may have flirted with the idea of not going for a while but she is clearly a smart, ambitious girl, in the end she wouldn't have given it up for a guy she just met. Maybe they would have tried to make it work, but probably before the first semester was over she would have met someone at Duke and forgotten all about her farm boy back home.

Feelings are feelings, no one can say Dani's feelings were insignificant because it was a crush and she wasn't old enough to be with Court. It doesn't change the fact that she was very deeply in love with Court (or at least she thought she was) and her sister (whom she already confessed to wanting to be like because she thinks Maureen has everything) swooped in and stole him away. And yeah, 14 and 17 isn't really a great age difference, but a freshman dating a senior isn't totally unheard of and they made it a point to say how her own mother was only 13 and head over heels in love with her father who was 17 at the time....they ended up married with 4 kids. So it's not like the prospect of Dani and Court being together was insanely out of the question.

Maureen knew it was wrong, which is why she pushed Court away at first. She knew it would kill Dani. But then she went for it anyway for her own selfish benefit. It happens...and is sort of understandable, sometimes its very hard to do the right thing over what you really want, but that doesn't change the fact that she completely betrayed her sister for a cheap (I mean come on, they just met) roll in the hay.

reply

[deleted]

Yes, I would agree, Maureen was in the wrong. She knew full well how her sister felt about Court, they discuss his kissing abilities, and Maureen, knowing her sister had feelings for him (regardless of her age) still flirted with him, then slept with him! She knew how her sister felt, and she selfishly went ahead anyway.

reply

Just watched this.

I've been in Dani's position -- hopelessly, helplessly crushed on a boy just old enough and just mature enough to be out of my reach. However, I've also been in Maureen's position -- in my case, blindsided by mutual attraction with a boy one of my friends wanted. I've been on the opposite side of that fence, as well. I've even been in Court's shoes, albeit in reverse, the object of a crush by a boy three years younger than me.

I thought the movie did a beautiful job of characterizing the positions of all three.

It's terrible to be in Dani's shoes. However, neither did Maureen do anything wrong. There's a huge difference between deliberately going out and trying to get a man you know a friend or sister wants and falling in love despite every good intention in the book. There was no doubt that Maureen would never have had anything to do with Court, no matter how *she* felt, if there was any indication at all that he felt about Dani the way Dani felt about him. She could turn Court down forever -- but why? You can't dictate who someone loves, and love of that quality is rare enough that it shouldn't be turned away if it comes to you. All one can ever do is act as honorably as possible.

In the end, I think Dani had a crush; Maureen was in love. And part of Dani's coming of age was recognizing the difference between the two. Court replaced Elvis as Dani's crush, but Court was the piece Maureen was missing from her life. Having finally met someone like that myself, I can't imagine being able to turn that away.

reply

Maureen and Court were not in love - it was most definitely lust IMO. They only knew each other for a few days.

Dani and Court had a real connection.

reply