So what's the best line?
There are so many goodies, I couldn't begin to pick a favorite.
Some of the best:
"FUBAR... big time."
"Plan A is definitely a loser."
"Good news and bad news, which do you want first? The bad! We're almost out of gas. The good! We're almost out of gas."
"My little contribution to birth control."
"Over my dead body. Deal!"
"Bad cop. WORSE cop!"