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Things we learned from Night of the Creeps

posted 12 years ago by LookielouE1705
12 replies | jump to latest

1. Aliens are lousy shots.
2. When a cop tells you there's an escaped maniac on the loose, you should probably not respond by abandoning your date to go off exploring in the woods.
3. Corpses that have been dead for 27 years do not get up and go for a walk by themselves.
4. No sorority is complete without a bunch of human brains locked up in the cellar.
5. Frat boy ex-boyfriends and zombies are easily confused.
6. Campus police departments have flamethrowers locked away, just in case.
7. If you learn that alien slug creatures are re-animating corpses, you should assume they are headed to the sorority house and go straight there with your trusty campus-police flamethrower.
8. Fraternity hijinks will be the end of us all.

[–] ActionScaleHero 12 years ago

9. The phrase "Screaming like Banshees" is funny and you will repeat it until you die.

JLT
http://mythicalmicrocosms.blogspot.com/

[–] jcshetler 11 years ago

#10 stryper rules.

#11 there's always time to stop and smell the roses.

#12 as soon as you tell a story about killing a murderer he re-animates and kills an old lady...

#13 ... and when you kill an axe murderer you leave the axe with his body.

The Dumbing-Down of America
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dumbing_down

[–] JSouth1 11 years ago

#14 Den mothers houses have 1/4" paneling for their floors.
#15 a push mower makes a good zombie-killer.
#16 a bathroom stall is a good place for fortune 500 members to meet.
#17 if your dog or cat looks like it's face is torn off..get RID of it...do NOT just stare at it!!

[–] ActionScaleHero 11 years ago

#18: That's what you get for going with a f*&^ing psych major, isn't it?

I'm straight up lovable, son.

[–] realtor 10 years ago

19- Detective Cameron is easily confused with Bullwinkle Moose in dim lighting
20- . . . or Bozo the clown on the phone
21- A corpse will go from frozen stiff to walking condition in under 2 minutes
22- A shotgun is a great substitution for a requisition slip at the police armory
23- If you see a zombie punch through your floor with an axe - don't attempt to leave for safety. Just sit there, look frightened and wait to get dead
24- If they carted each piece of her out on a different stretcher, they'd be there all night
25- Cops have no future
26- Betas are better!
27- Sitting on the bench watching Steve/Chad/Biff play is a lot of fun
28- Having sex with a farm animal is preferable to dating Cynthia
29- Despite a massive gas explosion, a cigarette will remain completely intact in the charred smoker's mouth
30- The sergeant's exam doesn't include counting to two
31- Two college kids can run 40 miles an hour when really scared

[–] robert-durant-626-472948 10 years ago

32 - Cynthia is proof that you really can fall in love at first sight.

33 - It takes technologically advanced aliens nearly 30 years to find their missing experiment.

34 - You wonder why the slugs never went to the cemetery in the first place.

[–] DemonGate 10 years ago

35. The bitch went into the Beta House.

\m/ \m/

[–] robbielovestheladies 10 years ago

37. J.C. declared that he would rather have slugs from outer space go into his brain than join a fraternity. He didn't join the fraternity, did he?

[–] rship1 10 years ago

38. Policemen with clipboards do not notice blood encrusted naked zombies with with hemostats hanging off their necks. This is the janitor's job

39. When your cat comes in the from the balcony, be sure to pick it up and swirl it with your hands like a baton. Cats love this

40. Only Men's restrooms need handicap signs on them, thus all women's restrooms are already handicapable

[–] ActionScaleHero 10 years ago

41. Every time you get bad news, you must ironically say "Wonderful".

I'm straight up lovable, son.

[–] techbox14 10 years ago

42. There is no 42

43. See #42

44. Whales have radar

[–] brianpierce32 9 years ago

45. if you see a dog in the road with flashing eyes crash instead of hitting it
46. the good news is your dates are here
47. the bad news they are dead
48. slugs crawling on the ground are faster than humans running on foot.