I didn't really feel sorry for Frank. I don't think Tony was trying to push Frank out immediately. He was initially put off by Frank's man, Omar Suarez, but felt that he could bypass him and deal with Frank directly. True, he was infatuated with Elvira, and from all appearances, she wasn't happy being with Frank. Tony wanted to marry her, not just keep her as a girlfriend/coke whore.
I think the meeting with Sosa is what may have turned Tony against Frank. He learned that Omar was an informer, and Sosa placed doubt in Tony's mind as to the quality of Frank's leadership. Maybe it was Sosa's way of warning Tony that he was part of organization which was a sinking ship. If Tony believed that Sosa thought poorly of Frank, then to be too loyal or too closely associated with Frank may not have been in Tony's best interest. He could see that Sosa was far more powerful, better organized, and more ambitious than Frank. He was offering Tony a choice - and an opportunity which could lead to untold riches.
Frank made his own bed, and Tony knew he wasn't going to last. I suppose Frank could have survived if he just faded away or disappeared - which he offered to do just before he was killed, but it was too late by then. Frank was kind of arrogant, thinking Tony was just some upstart - a "peasant." He looked down on Tony and underestimated him.
It's true that Tony made deals using Frank's money, but he was certain that Frank would get an enormous return on his investment. If Frank vetoed the deal, then Tony and Frank could have severed their business relationship and Tony could have operated independently and still keep his deal with Sosa. Which is what ended up happening anyway. He didn't really have to kill Frank for that reason, though. Frank was the one who forced the matter and struck the first blow (by the attempt at the nightclub). If not for that, then Tony may not have killed Frank.
As for Tony stealing his girl, you may be right, but it's not as if Elvira and Frank were married. Elvira seemed unhappy, and Frank just seemed to use her as an "ornament," while Tony wanted to marry her and start a family. He wanted to make her happy. But that became his own undoing. A sad tale of unrequited love.
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