(BTW I started this thread before and have no idea why it was deleted)
1. When Tevye thinks he always considers both hands.
2. When Tevye thinks he freezes time and if you are in the same room you will be caught in an unflattering pose (Lazer Wolf with his mouth open)
3. If you want to re-start an old argument in the village, you can make it look as obvious as you want too and your neighbors will still fall for it.
4. When Tevye is angry, even flies are afraid to fly.
5. The rabbi who praises himself, has a congregation of one.
6. There IS a blessing for the czar, & it is "God Bless and Keep the czar, far away from us."
If you love Mary and Jesus Christ and are 100% proud of it, copy this and make your signature!
7. Rich people like to Bee-dee Bee-dee boom (or something like that).
8. Tradition is nice, no wait important, no wait crucial to the survival of the community or our lives would be as shaky as a fiddler on a roof (was fiddling on a roof common practice in 1900 Russia?)
9. A vindictive wife can become even more vindictive after death, if her husband re-marries the bride has to ask, 'honey, have we been married for two or three weeks?' (I hope this wasn't the reason my thread got deleted before)
10. Not everybody is a Yente.
11. The Bible teaches that you can never trust an employer.
12. For someone who was slow of tongue, Moses sure talked a lot.
If you love Mary and Jesus Christ and are 100% proud of it, copy this and make your signature!
13. Even a poor tailor is entitled to some happiness
14. Lazar Wolfe can keep his diseased chickens
15. The most important attribute of a Cossack guard is that they have at least four Tenors and are very good dancers; military competence and horsemanship is a nice to have.
16. Tevye is aware of what The Good Book Says under all circumstances.
17. When betrothing a daughter into marriage, your word may be important but if you shake hands and have a drink you might as well have written and signed the contract in your own blood.
18. If you are getting a matchmaker to find you a match, it's better that it be a drunk, rather than sober, or he'll beat you every night.
19. A bird may love a fish, but, where will they build a home?
20. University is where they teach you how to disrespect your elders.
If you love Mary and Jesus Christ and are 100% proud of it, copy this and make your signature!
21. Having a toothache while you are filming a very poignant scene, is a very good asset.
If you love Mary and Jesus Christ and are 100% proud of it, copy this and make your signature!
22. The best way to cure insomnia is to wake your wife and tell her a fabricated dream.
23. Rabbis can talk but priests are usually silent.
24. Tailors can learn how to sew but learning Bible stories is even more important. Otherwise, how can they impress girls?
25. Weddings in early 1900's Eastern Europe were similar to Wrestlemania in 21st century America.
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33. Dancing with a wine bottle on your head is a rarefied art form.
34. A double chin is a sign of success.
35. When you hire a tutor for your daughters and he looks like Paul Michael Glaser, don't be surprised if some extracurricular activities go on.
I'm not crying, you fool, I'm laughing!
Hewwo.
36) For girls: One of the best ways to meet guys is by taking your cow for a walk.
37) For children: If you're going on a long journey, and especially if you might never see your family again, the best time to tell your parents of your destination is a few moments before you board your train.
38) For elderly women: Nothing beats the post office as a form of entertainment.
39. Peasant tailors in a shtetl in 1905 Russia have nicely shampooed and stylized hair, and have a beautiful top hat in storage.
/s/ Signature? Nah, I don't want to sign anything.
40. Of all God's miracles large and small the most miraculous one of all is giving her to him.
41. One day Yenta's head will fall off and a horse will kick it in the mud.
42. It's no sin to dance with a girl.. The Rabbi said so..
43. Up to this minute she misunderstood.. That she could get stuck for good!
44. The horse was really 12.
45. She guessed Yenta was going to the Holy land.
46. Sewing machines can cause quite a stir.
47. Chicago is very close to New York.
48. Flocks of geese and lone stray cows can often be found right outside of churches.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
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49. In 1905 Russia had huge cornfields. That didn't happen until the 1940s when Nikita Khrushchev advocated the cultivation of corn in the Soviet Union.
50. If a man's wife burns his dinner, he is permitted to divorce her.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
51. If you live in New York, America, you're neighbors with someone living in Chicago, America.
52. There is a song for every instance in your life.
53. You can enjoy an opulent house and comfortable lifestyle by slaughtering innocent animals.
54. When you spontaneously break into song, so will everyone else, accompanied with complex choreographed dance and full orchestra music. And none thinks it strange.
share55. Sociology classes in college should include lessons on marriage proposals.
56. University is where people go to learn how not to respect their elders.
57. The best way to do farm work is while daydreaming about riches.
58. A bird may love a fish, but where would they build a home together?
59. It is appropriate to display gifts, like pillows and live chickens, at wedding celebrations.
60. The best place to smooch and neck is right outside of tailor shops.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
61) To be a person, you must have a sewing machine and a baby.
share62) Don't put all your cakes out on the table when the matchmaker comes by to visit.
63) Matchmakers, in early 1900's Russia, weren't too successful in their professions.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
64) Before propping up the bar in the Nag's Head, Trigger was a russian orthodox sexton.
I know the meaning of life, it doesn't help me a bit.
65. When a poor man eats a chicken, one of them is sick.
---
Choocheechoo choocheechoo choocheechoo ya ya pow!
66. People can get rich by killing innocent animals.
67. Any problem can be dealt with by quoting the Good Book.
68. If you spit in the air, it lands in your face.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.