mnpls, non-self is one of the three key Buddhist principles. Buddhist nirvana is a supreme state of being and it can be attained by a living person.
The Buddhist concept of reincarnation is more of a cause and effect model of indestructible matter and consciousness.It does not believe that a unique and identifiable soul or spirit is being reincarnated.
You are right that a Buddhist is discouraged to have desires.But Buddhism is not a prescriptive religion and it incorporates and accepts all states of a person,all the time showing him or her the best way. Moreover, Buddhism prescribes the middle path, i.e. not going to the extreme either way, in the path of satisfying all desires or shunning all desires.
I know this is not a clear answer, but Buddhism is like the uncertainty principle.You will never get a pat answer,though this does not mean that the core system is difficult to understand.
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