Things I learned from watching this drivel
1. It is possible for a man to marry and murder several merry widows, without ever having been photographed
2. A man who has obtained $40,000 by murder will leave the money casually strewn about his rooming house room.
3. A dotty old landlady who finds said $40,000 in $1,000 bills strewn about said rooming house room, will think nothing of it.
4. A man travelling across the country from coast to coast will be followed by police, even though they don't know what the man they are looking for looks like.
5. If there is an article in the paper about murders you have committed, it is a good idea to draw attention to yourself by trying to remove said article, since your brother in law will immediately suspect you if he reads the article.
6. It is a good idea to give someone a ring obtained by murder, without first checking to see if there is any engraving inside.
7. It is a good idea to open a bank account, and deposit $40,000 in $1,000 bills.
8. If you suspect someone of something, perhaps murder, it is a good idea to confront them with your suspicions. It is an even better idea not to go to the police, or to reveal your suspicions when they come to you.
9. A middle-aged woman will allow two men into her home to do a "survey".
10. Bad news can kill a middle-aged woman.
11. It is possible to sabotage a stair plank, without leaving any marks on the wood.
12. When caught in a garage with a car engine running, it is not possible for a woman to kick open a flimsy garage door, or to drive the car through it.
13. If police suspect one of two men of murder, if one of them flees and is killed, they will immediately conclude that he is the guilty party.
14. If a police detective leaves several addresses where he may be reached, a woman in distress will not be able to find him at any of them.
15. A woman on a train will not notice the departure of the train until it is moving too fast to get off. She will not be able to extricate herself from a man's grasp.
16. Police will not arrest a man in a small town to avoid embarrassment. Instead, they will attempt to arrest him as he flees.
17. When discussing at dinner the murder of several merry widows, it is a good idea to lament the worthlessness of their lives, and compare them to animals.
18. A man who is unable to throw a woman from a train can succeed in throwing himself off the train.
Good grief.