Jack Black is living proof that the homo sapiens gene pool has gotten seriously messed up lately. He's a greasy blob of a creature, unfit to be either seen or heard by the living. He should be chained in a basement somewhere, as humanity's dark and shameful secret. What kind of perversity could inspire someone to put this guy in a movie or TV show is completely beyond me... perhaps it's a conspiracy by some alien race to weaken our morale and sap our will?
shareThis message has been deleted by an administrator
shareThis message has been deleted by an administrator
shareThis message has been deleted by an administrator
shareOh.
My.
God.
Jack Black, cooler than Billy Zane?? Billy Zane???
If Billy Zane's little finger had a little finger of its own, which in turn had another even littler finger, there would be more talent and coolness in that littlest of little fingers than in all of Jack Black's body.
Billy Zane controls your mind. Billy Zane has treasures beyond measure. Billy Zane is an international man of mystery. Billy Zane can get women pregnant just by winking at them.
Why would you say such things about Billy Zane? Perhaps you are a representative of some malevolent alien race, I do not know. But I do not fear you, because I know that the truth will prevail. Jack Black will be cast down as the false idol that he is. Perhaps Billy Zane himself will do it, and that day will forever be known as Billy Zane Day.
Amen.
Billy Zane? Seriously? If Jack Black dropped a deuce, and that steaming pile was made of molecules, and those crap molecules were composed of atoms, and one of those atoms had a little finger, then that little atom finger of Jack Black's loaf would have approximately 10.75 times as much talent as Billy Zane on the most glowing day of his career.
shareGarbage? Ladies and gentlemen, please do not be fooled by bluemountains. He is clearly a representative of an insidious alien race. His mission is to contribute to the downfall of humanity by promoting Jack Black. The aliens believe that if Jack Black is seen as an embodiment of coolness, then foolish, weak-minded people will seek to emulate him, and thus abandon all true coolness.
We must not let this evil plan work. Reject Jack Black! Recognize him as the lumpish oaf that he is. View the new King Kong movie in horror, noticing how he sucks the fun and plausibility out of every scene that he's in. View High Fidelity with rage, and make note of Christopher Moore's immortal words: "Have you never met anyone who works in a record store? There's no greater repository of unjustified arrogance in the world." View School of Rock with utter disbelief that Jack Black thinks that he is either funny or a good musician.
Nothing less than the fate of humanity is at stake. If we succumb to the clever, seductive words of bluemountains and his extraterrestrial ilk, we will soon be a planet of disgusting Jack Black lookalikes, perfectly ripe for alien conquest.
Yes, I know that you do not yourself resemble Jack Black, because you are verily a creature from another world. Please tell me more about your mighty species! Are you, for example, a carbon-based organism like us, a silicon-based organism, or something else entirely. Are you large like a whale, tiny like a mouse, or approximately human-sized? Do you have feathers, or fur, or scales? Do you speak verbally, or do you primarily use telepathy? If the latter, how did you manage to lean our Earth language of English and post these messages on imdb? Your capacity for guile and cleverness has impressed me, and admittedly left me somewhat awe-struck, but I must still reject your alien conquest! We humans are a proud race, and we want no overlords from beyond the stars, however clever they might in fact be. Thus, I will continue to resist you and your plans to promote Jack Black. May you reside peacefully in your own solar system, and of course you may feel free to take Jack Black with you if you wish.
shareMan groww up seriously
You do know that he has feelings like everybody else ever thought of that
Your calling the jack black fans aliens rigghttto then
At least were not wierdos like youuu
Gosh how long did it take you to write this? Your wasting your time on writing this to someone you dont likee
That really shows of how much of a loser you are
WhySoSerious
Rip Heath Ledger 1979-2008
that's a bit harsh isn't it
When there's no more room in hell, The dead will walk the earth...