Okay, I've been warned not to respond or at the very least get a dictionary but today is a good one for me. My 19th sober Birthday. Before that..bedlam and I didn't get it right the first couple of times (I started trying to stop in 86 and it took 3 more years to "get it" but tomorrow, who knows?
At the risk of this appearing in Variety, like the last time I blogged, I had to thank the kindness of strangers..again. One of the proofs that there is some god out there.
As for the nasty comments from strangers, I guess if I really believed what they did I'd be judgement too but I'd like to clear up acouple of your "facts" (I was actually there).
1. I met Roseanne in 1983, we'd both recently started doing comedy and worked together and immediately hit it off. This was years before she moved to L.A. and famous (I think she made 300 for the week and me 250). But her awesome talent was very apparent (Read David Carr's "Night of The Gun", he was also there that night).
There is nothing sexier than a smart, funny, good mother and best of all, she thought I had talent, much to my surprise. So I began doing road gigs with her and writing jokes for her..sure, she was not a size 0 but neither was I by a longshot nor were any of the women in my family, but she believed in ME and that trumps your classic looks.
I can out to L.A. to write because she thought I knew her character and the midwestern lifestyle better than anyone..she also liked that in a big boys world, at 5 ft tall, it wasn't so bad to have a 6'2'crazy man on her side. Especially through the first couple season when they seriously tryed to change her vision (she didn't even get the "created by" credit on ROSEANNE!!!) Hence, the attitude. This was 88 and yes I was an almost dayly drug abuser.
When our relationship became more that friendly, that became a problem. So after a couple failed attempts at rehab, risking losing everything she'd given me, the chance to be a step father, work on a dream show and be loved, I finally admitted I couldn't stop, right before our big wedding. I got into a cab and went back it, stayed and did the work, for me, not to manipulate her or get my job back or my new family or the tabloid press back into my good graces..that never works anyway. I hated ME, so..I found a picture of myself when I was 4, when my mom left and decided I would try to stay sober for that kids because he didn't deserve to die that way..and it's worked so far..my stepkids went in after me and that bonded us in ways I cannot explain.
Of course, still alittle crazy but afraid of losing each other, we married (NOT RECOMMENDED) 2 days out of rehab and had some pretty good years before everything fell apart..unlike the news reports I left that marriage without a dime, no alimony, nothing. Could've had 60-75 mil, but that was my stepkids money (it's public record so it's easy to look up) but I did leave with the greatest gift of all, self confidence, she gave me something my family never even considered. I am of course grateful for the opportunity to be a real Step Father not to mention the jobs..so of course I loved her..probably still do and when you truly love someone, they aren't overweight (than good for me, too:) it's not what you think you see that counts, love is a cool pare of glasses..
Finally, the show she "gave me" The Jackie Thomas Show, had so much talent, and was so good I don't think you've ever seen it. You'd be surprised.
Sadly, she and I haven't spoken since we got divorced 15, yes 15 years ago (before True Lies even came out..are you saying Roseanne forced me on Jim Cameron and Arnold S. I don't think so..) but it still haunts me professionally...still, I wouldn't of had the opportunities she gave me and most important, I wouldn't be alive. So, thanks Rosey, I hope you're well and I root for you and the kids. I really felt loved, important, apart of a family and those 6 years were a blessing and made me grow up. (although I did make a few mistakes after, both personal and professional but I've had opportunities I only dreamed about at the meat packing plant (R met me after that, I'd started school after saving money at the U of Iowa, then on to MPLS)
As far as the crazy abuse accusations, she publically appologized, said her lawyer made her do it and it wasn't even close to true...and that was after she had a new man so...I loved her and I know she loved me. We laughed alot and took care of each other..then we, partly our fault, became a stupid public spectacle, we thought of is as performance art, or so we told our selves, but with her mental illness (remember, she was there for me) it eventually over ran the real marriage and frankly, she filed for divorce but I was already worn out...not something a man likes to admit but true and I know she tryed SO HARD too..which made it all the more sad..which turned to anger, accusations etc. but the real true is even sadder than that..we failed. I failed. L,Tom
reply
share