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Is there a movie that could help me lower my beauty standards? (Details in description)

posted 2 years ago by robocop2019 (215)
26 replies | jump to latest

I have ruined my brain. I have been watching filth on the internet ever since I was a kid. After 15-20 years of pornography/nudity/insta models/YouTube chicks I have conditioned my brain and not in a good way. I am no longer attracted to average woman. Specially if they don't have large breasts.
I have given up watching porn, Instagram etc. It's only been 25 days which might not seem much, but it is for me. Hopefully that will help. But I want to do everything I can to have a normal brain again as fast as I could. I realized how much this has messed up my mind very late. I wish I had stopped myself early on.

I look at men with below average looking woman and I wonder how the hell does he get aroused by her. How is he happy? Then I realized that the problem is not with those men or those women. The problem lies with me.

I remember when I was much younger (12-13), it was so easy for me to get aroused. I didn't need to look at the most well-endowed woman out there. The standards were pretty low. But years of exposure to world's hottest women (artificially enhanced or otherwise) has numbed my brain.

I want to watch a movie/series that could shift my focus from physical attributes to other more important things. I believe people can be conditioned into finding certain attributes more attractive. For instance, people in certain parts of the worlds care about thick thighs more than anything else. In other parts or the worlds people like petite women. In yet another people like big chubby women. Because they grew up where these attributes were promoted. Their brains have adapted to it. So, I believe that conscious mind has an effect on subconscious mind and vice versa.

[–] moviechatterer (15769) 2 years ago

Shallow Hal springs to mind as a "a movie that could help me lower my beauty standards"

Women can be attractive with their personalities too you know .
I'd find a experienced 40 year old women who knows what she wants in bed far more attractive than an air headed bimbo with drawn on eyebrows and fish lips doing pointless 10 second tik tok vids

[–] robocop2019 (215) 2 years ago

Yes they can be. But the beauty is in the eye of the beholder and I am the beholder. And I am messed up.

[–] MartyDeniro (4173) 2 years ago

Why shift from one type of movie to another when you look out at the real world? Immerse yourself in reality rather than looking at a screen with hope of brainwashing you in a different direction. You just need to choose to focus on those things you know to be more important.

[–] R_Kane (15828) 2 years ago

Marty, that is excellent advice. I hope the OP is grateful.

[–] Noufa (398) 2 years ago

+1.

Reminds me of when my sister was getting ready for a concert where her boyfriend (now husband) was playing guitar for the opening act. I asked if she was more interested in seeing his band or the headliner, Metallica.

Without missing a beat, she said his band.

She then conceded that Metallica was an objectively better band. But the fact that she knew everyone in the group made them more important. Nothing "conditions" you like the nearness of a real, flesh & blood human. It can be hard to put yourself out there. But it's the only thing that works.

[–] robocop2019 (215) 2 years ago

Marty does have a point. I just wanted something to act as a seed. Like a movie that will plant a thought, an idea in my brain which would then grow the more I think about it over and over again.

[–] MartyDeniro (4173) 2 years ago

You already have the thought, the seed, or you would not have ditched porn. You expressed it here, "more important things" -- so you have the "idea in your brain" right now. You just have to act upon it, rather than hoping some other method will inject something that will relieve you of that effort. Iow, it's volitional.

[–] Otter (24464) 2 years ago

Seriously, turn off the movies and TV, definitely turn off the porn, and go out and look at real humans. Go to beaches, go to bars or clubs, wherever people go to be sexier than usual in public. Just go and look at real human females, talk to people who feel like talking. Take up running or hiking or a gym, get to know your body better, build confidence in your own physical attractiveness.

And limit your jerking off. Be a bit horny when you go out and interact with real humans, it might help.

[–] MartyDeniro (4173) 2 years ago

I think you meant to reply to him.

[–] Otter (24464) 2 years ago

Sorry! I meant to both agree with you and address the OP, apologies if it came off like I was telling you to whack off less.

[–] TexasJack (12516) 2 years ago

Quitting porn seems like a good first step, so congrats on that.

[–] robocop2019 (215) 2 years ago

Yeah. Better late than never. Porn and Instagram models are poison for brain. I know that first hand.

[–] sslssg (34313) 2 years ago

Try reading? Learn how to stimulated your brain.

I think the biggest problem with being attracted to only physical attributes is that looks change. If you can't find a way to be attracted to someone outside of their looks, then you will never be able to have a meaningful relationship. Perhaps you should try some therapy.

[–] robocop2019 (215) 2 years ago

Any recommendations? Any books?

[–] sslssg (34313) 2 years ago

I can't tell you what will stimulate your brain. Outside of porn, what sort of stories do you like? I really think that talking to a therapist could really help you. Read books or watch movies with strong female characters who are well written. Talk to females in the real world.

[–] aliensalmon (5647) 2 years ago

Maybe realize that even "beautiful" people have flaws and problems?

I kinda did that myself.

[–] robocop2019 (215) 2 years ago

Yes. I realize that on a rational level. And yet I am no longer attracted to mediocrity. I have brought it upon myself over the years. Just knowing it doesn't change the sad fact that my standards are too high. It's like drugs. You need more and more to get the same high.

[–] MonStar (12990) 2 years ago

Indian movie being released Friday 4 November 2022 in India and some North American theaters:

Double XL (2022) - The slice-of-life comedy drama explores the journey of two plus-size women, as they navigate society's beauty standards. Two women from India in the UK.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt15614274/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0

Trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQmQy-Wu72g

[–] TheMan18 (13052) 2 years ago

Maybe Lars von Trier's "The Idiots" (1998) or Mike Leigh's "Naked" (1993).

[–] Wint3rFir3 (7188) 2 years ago

Any movie that humanizes women for you. There's no specific film I can think of that is guaranteed to do that, you've got to pick based on your own personal tastes. Once you see women as human beings and are able to look beyond the physical, then you can be attracted to the person/personality, not the body alone.

Maybe try watching movies and TV shows with mainly women casts or leads, or full of women you aren't attracted to at all, where the actors aren't all models, such as Sister Act 1 & 2 (1992-1993), The Descent (2005), The First Wives Club (1996), Shrill (2019), The Mindy Project(2012), Parks & Recreation (2009) or Huge (2010)