MovieChat Forums > General Discussion > Long term relationship question.

Long term relationship question.


Asking for a friend of mine...

I have a friend who has been with the same person for 15 years, and he complains that she doesn't make an effort to spice things up anymore.

My question is, for those of you in long term (10 years plus) relationships. How do you keep the spark, the passion and the sexual desire alive and going strong? If this question is too personal, I apologize, and you need not answer.

Just curious on what worked for success stories and what maybe didn't work.

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Yoga.

It may not be something she is necessarily drawn to, but that's okay. They don't have to go to that many sessions but they do need to go together.

This is a partner thing.

If your *friend* likes yoga, forget the whole thing. But if your friend hates yoga, this will work like a charm.

At first, your friend would just participate without complaining. But after a while, he starts to interact with the other guys in the class. Guys who actually like yoga and are easily intimidated.

He makes faces at them, when no one else can see. Maybe he tells someone that his leotard is untied, does a "made you look" and scores a poke to the chin.

Little stuff.

They will begin to treat your friend like a leader and so will everyone in the class because they want to be on his side. They don't want to feel like they got sand kicked in their face. But it gets better...

One day, tired of the shenanigans, a student rises up against your friend in a way where your friend is seen as the peacekeeper, not the aggressor. Even the teacher would blush.

That's my suggestion.

Go get 'em, Tiger!

"I had a dream I woke up next to you in real life and the cyanide was still on the set."

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Communication is key. Your friend needs to tell his significant other how he feels. Keeping your feelings boxed up in a relationship is a recipe for disaster.

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Good point Padeen
'Boxed Up' ends in tears and lawyers every time...honesty is crucial

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Involve yourself with someone you enjoy the company of...especially after you climax!
Don't have kids...or atleast wait until you are both ready...
Develope common interests and/or nurture existing ones.
Have conversations
Treat meals like special occasions
Bathe together
Act as though every day was your last together
Kiss each other goodnight
Never go to bed angry at each other
View each other as incentive towards being a better person
Never miss an opportunity to say I love you or to receive a kiss
Give compliments
Be able to take criticism
Put thier needs before yours
Realize that that person is your best friend!
Don't settle for anyone that makes you feel bad about yourself
Seek trustworthiness
Exhibit trustworthiness
Be prepared to kill for them
Be prepared to die for them

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I love this DF.
Very true all of it.
I'd add,always be on each others side.

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Dazed...I feel shitty! I responded to your kind words and even edited my post to reflect your suggestion...and somehow the post did not take😡 that is the second time today...shitty iOS!

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You don't have kids ??

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No..no children...and I believe I will edit that. For my wife and I it was the right decision, but I would really like nothing even remotely negative to be associated with this post...some folks might take offense...

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You and mrs hownos have no children...or they have left the nest?

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One and he has left the nest for now.

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I think I knew that and forgot. Gotta say that I am in the extreme minority on the kids situation...glad I edited that part😊

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I don't understand the first one.

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Yoga.

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that is quite funny

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Alrighty...delicately put...make sure you are with a person that you can tolerate or better yet enjoy the company of after the intimacy concludes.

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That clarifies it. I thought there was a third person in the room.

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You and your wife bathe together ??

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Upon occasion...oddly enough...we do not sleep together...I have insomnia so we are on different sleep schedules...

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We have to remember what brought us together in the first place. Yes, things change, but relationships need working on, just like taking care of a house or car. You have to clean it, repair it, give it new paint, new this, new that.

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